Keep an open mind, my suspicion is that by the time you get to Shodan that you will feel differently. An adage that we like to repeat, both here and as Karateka in general, is that Shodan is just the beginning. Testing anxiety does suck, but we all feel it. I've been doing Martial Arts for 19 years and a I just tested for gokyu (green belt) and I was anxious. I've been a gokyu before, I've been a Shodan for over a decade, I practiced, and I new I had nothing worry about; but I was still worried. A good sensei does not test students who they don't know aren't ready to move up. It's possible I could change my mind, I've been known to do that. And I agree that we do not test until we are ready.