Kieran-Lilith

I'm back. Went to King's Island today. I hurt so badly...oww...oww....Feet, legs, back, shoulders, neck, head, everything but arms and hands. Ouch.....Advil is wonderful. The Face/Off is evil, I tell you, evil! EVIL!!!!!!! IT GOES TOO FAST, and I couldn't see where I was going, and it spun around and around and the pooor friend I dragged with me tried to kill me. I think I'm going to go collapse now....

I am a very big reader. Poor English teachers don't know what to make of me. Thank you, though, I have to go find those once I'm done with these. *indicates large pile of books on her desk*

We're off 12 weeks, though I think it's down to almost 10 weeks. It's sad, we're celebrating that it's getting closer to the end. But thank you for the ideas, I think I might actually have to go steal my brother's game systems....hehehe....

We don't spend ALL day on the internet....just most of it. We do eat and sleep and take bathroom breaks every now and then.

Ummm....I just realized it might be wise to mention I can't drive. I'm still too young.

You know, I think the scientists are rather slow on the uptake...

It's a pity I'm not good with patience, then....but Star Wars? In the dojo? And dancing? I still can't believe it. But, on the bright side, I got out of having to teach again by somehow getting sucked into a group that was learning the kata I'm on. Yes! Score! No teaching the midgety brats! Sorry, but a lot of them really are little demon children. I think half of them are there because their parents said so, not because they want to be, so it makes it very hard to teach when I have to. But Star Wars?

I don't make any secret of the fact I do martial arts, but I don't mention it unless it comes up. Usually the only reason the topic comes up with strangers is if they make reference to my brother, who has apparently gone off and made it known he's a karate student. Of course, then they find out about me in martial arts....none of them will just leave me alone, either. So what if I'm a girl in karate? *sighs* The horrors of high school....Although I do generally now have a response to "show me karate". "I am, I'm not bashing your head in from anger, am I?" They don't like me very much, it hasn't helped since I was already labelled freak and made very unpopular. Oh well. Such has been most of my life.

I know this won't include everyone, not quite, but summer break is finally here! The big problem being....I suddenly find I loathe summer break. I've gotten so used to the world of high school, where there is structure and learning going on, and what's more, my family...or, close friends, I suppose, are there. Every year before this I have been content to let my brain turn to mush. I don't feel like having that happen this year. So, the question being, does anybody have any sort of ideas to keep me busy (besides the dojo, which is closed this week. Tragic.) and keep my sad little sophomore brain on? Thank you.

I dunno, I kinda hafta agree with whoever said highschool is the best years of your life. Though, I can't say I'd know much about it, I am naught but a lowly freshman...but I will say, that I don't wanna get out for summer. I'm to the point where I even like the homework....oh well, guess that means I'll just have to train more in karate.

Music....ummm....music.....Marching Band....music....anyone catching a pattern? Ummm....other than that....nope. I'm obsessed with karate and music, and dedicate just about everything I have to those two things.

No splitting of ladies and men in our dojo. I wouldn't have it any other way, either. I'm bigger than all the other girls by a few inches, not to mention I'm just built bigger than they are. The guys are far more fun to spar. Except the other orange belt, but he doesn't like me anyway. Oh well.

A point I should have clarified: C feels this way because we drifted from her during my ordeal. I chose not to include her because I didn't want the whole school to know within the week. Even before that though, we had not been very good friends on either count. elila-I'm sorry for exploding at you. I did not mean to blow up, but there are several things I'd like to clear up. First off, the two situations are very different. C and I are very, very different people. She, in most cases, will do nothing to help herself, she waits for others to take control and rectify it for her. She has no initiative. She won't simply do things. She lets her emotions take control, rather than think about why she feels this way and do something to correct the situation. Even at my worst, to the point where I could not sleep at night, felt sick with grief and worry, fell asleep in class, didn't pay attention, even started losing it at the dojo, and nearly broke into tears every five minutes, I never felt the desire to end my life. I thought about what if I did, but everytime I thought that, I knew I could never do it because I love life. Anyway, yes, I would care if she ended up dead, which is why I feel so guilty about not wanting to be her friend or be around her. aefibird-I wish she would take up some new hobby, but her parents wouldn't let her. She already does a ton of stuff, and probably stretches herself too thing as it is. Besides, she says she'd suck at karate, and to top it off, she has no initiative to start anything, do anything, to become better. She's quite content to sit around and do nothing while she whines about how she has nothing to do. The counselor did talk to C's parents, and we did talk to the G.C. once alone. Essentially, she told us to give C another chance and wouldn't let me get a word in to explain how we felt about that. The Phenom- As I have said, she won't do anything. She has no focus in life other than to become a vet. But other than that, nothing really. She's involved in 4-H, baton twirling, and her church, and it consumes huge amounts of time. But she insists she has no friends to share life with, yet she's been sick all this week and we have lots of people wondering "Where is she?" They care. They are her friends. Yet she clings to us. ninjanurse-I think her parents know. Our great fear is that she will go suicidal on us moreso if we try to be other than what she expects us to be. She expects us to be her best friends, like we were last year. The problem being, none of us really remember who we were last year, and that part that we do remember, we don't act like anymore. Thank you for the advice so far, and I apologize again, elila.

You-You honestly think we haven't realized this?!?!?! HOW COULD WE NOT REALIZE IT!!!!! Sorry. Lost a bit of control. I know we're her last hope. We all know. But we don't fit with her, and all she does is cling and whine. She doesn't grow up. She doesn't make any effort to change things for herself. You know, we have grown up a lot. I don't claim to know everything about the world, because I don't. None of us do. We helped her out how we could. We lie to her to try and make her feel better. We act around her to make her feel good. How is that supposed to make us feel? We helped her, we brought her to the counselor, just as my friends helped me. But these are different. One involves a dead body, the other involves a broken mind. C has never had good self esteem, nothing, ever. We haven't been her friends all year, which is what brought this on, and we can't keep acting and lying for her sake, because it's hurting us! We won't suffer so someone else can live a lie!

Well, as my friends and I don't know what to do, I thought I'd pose the question here to see if I can get some new views on this. We have a friend, who will be called C. Our friend C was a very good friend last year. This year, if you will recall from an earlier topic of mine, I got into an abusive relationship, which, thankfully, my friends helped me through. Friend K was not one of the friends I chose to include in that serious of a matter. So she had already been discluded from school, because our schedules were so different, but then I chose to keep her out of this. We all grew up, a lot a lot. I know a lot of grown ups would disagree and say we're still just a bunch of kids....but we're not. We don't think like children anymore. Our concerns are centered outside ourselves, and not on such worthless, trivial things such as make up and models. Besides the point. Point being, C didn't grow with us. She was suicidal a while ago (as in two weeks), so we dragged her off to the guidance office at school. The Guidance Counselor, despite our protests, told us to give her another chance. We agreed, out of guilt. None of us want to be her friend. We still don't. The problem being, she clings to us, and whines, and we don't want her to go suicidal on us again. We just don't like her personality, it doesn't fit with ours. She whines, complains, and laughs about nothing nonstop. We don't whine much. We laugh when there's a reason. C doesn't like what we're involved in, and won't join. We're all karate kids, as the school named us. She knows she doesn't fit with us anymore. So, the question is, what do we do?

Lesse...5-7 year old dog named Treat. She's mutt, half Australian Kelpie, half Japanese Inu.

Hmmm....I made mine southpaw because almost everyone else in the dojo is left leg forward. It confuses them still, and gives me a slight bit of help.

Oh, the giggling morons? They'll always be around. Just fight hard, they won't goof off long after that. I swear, I have seen 7 year olds with better dojo behavior than them... And on the topic of guys saying they don't want to hit you....I know the feeling. The guys in my dojo are almost all bigger, stronger, and have been in karate of some sort longer. So, they don't want to hit me. I hit them. They hit me now, hard, enough to give me bruises and split lips. I am very happy.

Well, my sensei told us his reasons, and they make a lot of sense. When these people were making their katas up, they had to be practiced exactly the same, perfectly, every single time. If they weren't, you would lose the techniques hidden in the kata. For example, we were looking at Pinan Shodan kata on Thurs. We were doing what appeared to be lower level lock, gedan-barai. It could actually be turned into arm bars, throws, of course the block, and many other things. All that was hidden in just the one move. If someone changed it, then they could lose different moves. On some kata nights Sensei can be very, very strict. We have to do the kata, no little add ins of our own. As he puts it, wiping our noses is not part of his kata. How does wiping our noses teach us to defend ourselves?

Oh, the first test. I remember. I remember I hadn't learned a single bit of terminology. So, thankfully, my friend who also goes to the dojo with me goes to my school, and he proceeded to drill me as frequently as possible until it was all drilled firmly into my head. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't have passed. Good luck, don't freak, and remember to bow before kata.....heh....my one big mistake....Ouch....

.33 .52 anywhere around those...*is getting addicted to this thing*

My name is apparently Kaila.

Building on what opaque333 said, it reminds me of something we do in our dojo. It's not necessarily fun, but it gets them to concentrate and practice....and, in the process, most end up hating the exercise, but that's okay, it's good for them. Marching lines. They all line up, two or three or more rows. They do one technique down to the other end of the dojo, on the count. They line up at that end. During the process of sending them down there, like when they're on count 5, start the next row. It works. We all learn the techniques effectively. And you could do something to make it entertaining, I bet....I dunno, give prizes? Hmmm....or turn it into a race, I suppose....You could have them bounce on one foot down there to improve balance, maybe?

Ummm....well, my first time around with karate, I had never joined a sport team. I was there for a year, quit, then I've picked it up again after abuot 4 years, and no sports or anything in between. I pick a lot of physical things up quickly, even though my first dojo was a McDojo. The part I really love, though, is the philosophical aspects of MA. Not the point of this topic, but oh well. But no, I don't think it makes overly much difference.

My. Whole. Freaking. School. Is. Obsessed!!!!!!!!! You can't get through one class without hearing a quote, and then that sends all order out the window! Some of us are there to learn! I HATE THAT MOVIE!!!!!!! Okay, I'm good now. But the Rex-Kwan-Do scene is funny.