DisgruntledGirl

I would concider doing this if I 100% knew that I wanted out. I do not know for sure that I want to outright quit yet. Also I do not know how he would react to something like that but I do not want to start a confrontation with the man if I might want to come back later if he gets his act together. I think it all depends on how my "conversation" with him goes. If he gives me enough of a good vibe after talking with him about how frustrated I am I might even concider hinting to him to give me/us a discount for the next training period "contract" but that is an issue I will not push. I will tell you this much though, no more three month "contracts" for me. I will only be paying monthly now so that if it continues or if he starts again I can just take a month or two off, see if he gets his act together and then possibly come back. Typically when he would miss a class (whether class was canceled or even if there "technically" was a class but he just wasnt there) I tried to "take it on the chin" and wouldnt react too much at all. Last night was my first time actually reacting. I told the other Sensei quite openly of my frustration and she seemed to understand where I was coming from and felt bad for me (I am the most "dedicated" adult student they have right now... not that I'm any good mind you, I just show up to *every* class they have scheduled for the adults since I started a little less than 5 months ago which noone else can say they have). Maybe she will relay this to him somewhat, I dunno. I have concidered this option, but the other place I was thinking about, the time class starts gives me very little leeway if I have to stay a few minutes after 5:00 at work. Pluss the fact that I really should eat something substantial before going to class (I'm diabetic) to safely maintain a certain blood sugar level throughout class... though I'm sure something like a protein shake could probably acheive this as well. Then there is also the fact that I do not want to be always compairing the new teacher's methods to my old teacher's methods which I truely liked... not sure it would be fair to him, though there is of course no certainty that this would happen. The decision would be so much easier if I didnt like my current teachers teaching methods

yes I do intend on doing this... had intended on doing it tonight... had actually intended on doing it Wednesday (the first and only class he was at this week) but his daughter was hanging around too much and I didnt want to say anything "bad" to or about him within earshot of his daughter so I let it be. His reasons for missing classes are many. Twice he has apparently had car trouble, often it is because his daughter got sick real suddenly, she apparently has very bad asthma (so I cant fault him for those times). Last week I think he was assisting in a Seminar in the States (I am not in the USA) so in times like that I think he could just at the very least tell us before he goes so we at least might be prepared for a missed class. Ther are many other "reasons" I have been given and often I feel them to be legit though avoidable if you *really* wanted to (guess he doesnt). He keeps in all honesty a rediculous schedule... I dont think I could deal with the kind of working schedule that he has without feeling overworked (which I'm sure he is, though never lets it show when he is there). I guess what it boils down to is that I can "understand" that he is going to miss a few classes, I really can... especially when he is the *only* teacher... I just mainly wished that I could be kept in the loop more the times that he *knows* that he is not going to be there. Heck send out an e-mail at 4:00pm the very day that you are going to miss class... I'll check before I leave work or something. I just want some warning to not bother wasting my time/gas to get there for nothing. Also its the expence of the classes... he is EXTREMELY expensive... but also extremely worth it if he actually came from time to time. Dont mind me.. I'm mainly just venting.

I love my Sensei (no, not in "that" way). I find him to be an absolutely brilliant instructor. I find his teaching methodology to be top notch. He is good at showing you what the technique is supposed to look like, letting you do it a number of times to see if you will figure out on your own what you are doing wrong at first ('cus as a beginner you will almost never do it right the first couple (dozens/ hundreds of ) times and after you discover some things on your own he then refines them. This is only one reason why I like him. His personality is exactly what I would want in a teacher (firm... though quite often funny) and once class is over I feel remarkably comfortable talking to him. You are never made to feel "stupid" for not "getting it" and he is very encourageing when your confidence starts to falter. I find he takes the "art" very seriously and genuinely wants you to get it right, but he does not take himself too seriously, which I find to be great. So anyway, here is the problem: He is a brilliant instructor right? But he is almost never there (Ok so I'm exagerating but he misses a rediculous amount of classes IMO). He is the only "Karate" instructor at the school (it is his school) but there is another Judo/Tai Chi Sensei who primarily runs the office type duties untill the school is prepared to let her start teaching there as well (though she has taught some of us Karate students a little bit of Judo (I find that I actually *hate* judo (just isnt for me, nothing "wrong" with iti, just isnt for me) though find it very good for me to learn what little bit she teaches from time to time) and a tiny bit of tai chi (which I outright suck at) on occation when the Sensei was (once again) missing a class). BTW when I say he misses a lot of classes... that usually means that class is outright cancelled because of it, not always but often, so I drive there for absolutely nothing a lot of the times. I was going to tell him of my frustration when I went to class tonight... but guess what? That's right, he wasnt there! At no point had I really started contemplating quitting untill tonight just because it was kinda like the last straw (boy am I glad I didnt pay for a year... though have a little less than two months left on what I have already paid for). I *know* that I intend on going to all of the classes offered untill my current (3 month) contract is up... but after that, I'm not sure what I intend to do. I *want* to study under him! I like him as a person and as a teacher (when he teaches) but I am just starting to feel finacially cheated and taken advantage of!!! I *could* always just take a different Karate class somewhere else (at less than half the price I might add!!!) but it is no where near in as conveniant a location and I just seriously doubt that I would like another teacher as much s I like my current Sensei (have had the opportunity of being "taught" by two different Senseis in his absence and I found that they couldnt even compare... though Ii'm sure someone could... its just not likely in my limited pool to select from. I do NOT *want* to quit. I am so surprized at how much I actually like karate itself and most of that is to do with him... but... What would yall do?

My Sensei charges $85 per hour of private training... and oddly enough, he gets it. But I think that is because he feels the way that some others in here have stated... its his free time and if they want to take it from him... well they gotta pay for it, if people dont find the cost worth it then thats ok by him too, more free time for him. I myself wouldn't pay that much for private training... heck, if I'm already paying for "regular" training I wouldnt pay an additional $20/hour... but... I am cheap. I think most of the people who he trains privately either do it simply because the time the regular class happens does not fit into thier life well or for more of a crash course in Self-Defence (While he does teach self-defence in regular Karate class, it is not always the main focus so it will take a little more time time to learn enough stuff for just defending your life in multiple situations, rather than becoming a good "well rounded" karateka).

Well, I figured I'd add my own lil bit of ignorance to the mix (I've only be doing any type of MA for a lil less than 5 months) But many here mention the "respect" that the 12 year old shodan should have when competing... and I agree, to a point. But in a competition setting (which I have never been in btw) I would think that it should also boil down to "fairness" for both competitors. You have on the one hand the fact that the girl was 12 years old so "probably" smaller than any 18+ adult she would face. A dissadvantage some might say, which might very well be the main reason why she was put with the kids, whether she could whoop the adults or not she was judged beforehand to try to make it "fair" for her (this obviously was not needed in her case) But then you have the adults. Oddly enough many adults might be rather intimidated by a little 12 year old girl, blackbelt or not, and might initially go way too easy on her so as not to hurt her (probably) small little body, and by the time they realise they do not have to go "easy" on her, they would have already lost. Also there is always the fact that a trained blackbelt 12 year old will *usually* always be lighter on their feet, more agile ane more flexible than most 20+ year old martial artists. Its just the advantage of youth. Is this also a fair advantage for the child to have over the adult fighter? Possibly, but its not my place to judge that. So while I do think it worked out in the best for the girl, I completely understand the compentitions position in puting her with the kids initially. They allowed her to fight with the adults after she complained but at least that way it put it in her court to decide if she really wanted to. They were smart IMO just my $.02

Ahhh I see. Well then that is pretty cheap for 3 months + a gi. Also glad you found out a lil more info. More than likely once you watch a class you will hopefully be able to gauge a bit more whether it is worth it or not. Good luck

Are you SURE its NEW World Martial Arts Association or just World Martial Arts Association? If it is instead the latter then I found this http://www.wmaa.com/ and a few other links. $105 seems steep right off the top for most areas in the USA I must admit... though may not be depending on the cost of living in the area, quality instruction and class size... I actually pay slightly more (I do not live in the States). Hope that helped.

Oh I understand that... I dont really expect to be able to beat the man or anything. Its just even *I* know that he (purposely) left some openings that I just didnt take advantage of. I just couldnt bring myself to "hit" him... on occation I would like "pat" him ... but we were supposed to be going for something a little harder than that (was a situation of sorta self-defence and sorta "Karate" sparring together. So some traditional "rules" of karate could be broken but it wasnt like a light tap point sparring situation) and I just couldnt bring myself to do it. I'm sure I'll do better next time though. I think I just need to establish a little bit better with him how hard is "acceptable" before we get started.

Good point to the both of you. I'd have to agree here. I think that maybe because it was my first time he went rather easy on me so therefore I never really felt in any danger of even being minorly/temporarily hurt or hit hard. He seemed to just be messing with me a bit but never "truely" hitting me either. I'm sure when my opponents get a bit rougher with me... i will probably then return the favor, but will probably have a little difficulty untill that finally happens.

I'm still a bit of a beginner and in our class we dont really free spar unitll weve gotten a few basic techniques down and have gone through some very rehearsed 3 point sparring type things (so basically not untill you are yellow belt) etc. Well last night was my first night of what I guess you'd call free sparring. I think I evaded pretty well... but I found that I hardly ever even *tried* to hit the man (my Sensei). I have a mental block that "I dont wanna hurt anyone!!" even though I know that I am probably really not gonna hurt the sensei all that bad, I still couldnt get over it. I think I would handle myself a bitt better/differently if it was against someone who I didnt care for or was actually trying to hurt me (woulda hit a lot more to the groin)... but against someone that "hasnt done anything to me" I just have a hard time. Any tips on getting over this mental block or is this just one of them things that will just come with time and practice?

Aint it though? I really dont find it a big deal if I get a lil embarrassed in class when I mess up something I should very well know... it was just the "in front of people who are not a part of the class" part that had my nerves in a knot. I do try after class sometimes, I dont find that I get all that confused/messed up if I'm facing a different direction than I am used to... on very rare occation what I have found happen is I start to go in a bit of a continuous loop because I forgot where I started, so my directions etc are usually done in the right way... just perpertual

Went to my very first Belt Ceremony the other night.... I was the only adult there (even though I think 3 passed) so that in itself was kinda odd. Anyway, while giving me my belt my Sensei said some nice and encourageing things about how I'm an "Inspiration" yadda yadda yadda. All good stuff right? Then came the humiliation. What I hadn't really thought through before going was that we might actually have to do our kata during this ceremony... and well, I hadnt exactly been practicing all that much lately (was almost a month since the test) due to a lot of other stuff going on in my life at the time. I guess I was just hoping that it would have been voluntary. Lets just say... I didnt do well. Worst Ive ever done the Kata since I fully figured out what exactly to do where. I only really remember one big mistake with wrapping up with the wrong arm, realising it, getting a lil flustered and rewrapping up with the correct arm and continuing.... unfortunately however I went on autopilot after that so from then on while I know I did the right techniques at the right times... I have no clue how well or poorly I executed them. Felt like I embarrased not just myself but felt like my Sensei shoulda bin embarrassed too... even though when he saw my mistake and he saw the lil twinge of fluster he just said "its ok!" so I dont think it was as bad as I think it was. Lesson learned.... Always be prepared... and if I happen to not be prepared... then i'll just skip the ceremony

Before I get started I figure I might explain my usage of certain terms. I'll use the term like "the bone popps out" or "the bone popps back in"... when I think those are probably severe terms for what is actually going on... they are just the closest way to describe the "feeling" that I'm getting cus I would assume the bone "popping out" would be *a lot* more painfull than what I am experiencing. Ok these days whenever I try to do a simple chudan or jodan mae geri often times it will feel as though my leg bone will pop out of socket of my right hip (and only right hip the left one is always fine) during the actual kick and will sorta pop back in at the landing. This I feel from both a slight popping sound during both the kick and landing and also the feeling of the bone moving around and then settling back into place. Sometimes I will not actually feel anything out of place untill the next kick's landing in which I will feel slight discomfort and will then have to wriggle my hipps around a bit until I feel the sensation of the bone aligning properly again and then all is well. There is never any real "pain" during this whole process, at the most some slight discomfort from time to time especially in the cases where I actually have to purposly do something by wriggling to get things feeling right again. Any exercises anyone might recommend to maybe strengthen that right hip joint to hopefully prevent any serious type of injury from occuring? Cus really thats all I'm worried about... if it perpetually did this for all my life I could deal with that, but I dont want to one day dislocate something if there was anything I coulda done to prevent it. TIA

Glad you got started! I'm a bit of a newbie too and I know the feeling, from the first two weeks especially, of *really* soar thighs. While I will still have some minor soarness from time to time it gets much better. But what I find about doing this, (if one of your reasons for starting is a goal of "fitness") as opposed to just going to the gym.. I get much more mental stimulation which makes me keep going whereas if I were to get *that* soar going to the gym... I probably would have stopped long ago. Also I know about the distraction part too.... here I sit almost 4 months from getting started and I still find myself comeing here and brousing around/posting and going to other sites while i very well should be working!! I hope this will eventually pass Good luck

Gotcha. While I honestly do not even know yet the exact protocol that we are to use when asking a question (except that on rare occations that I have mentioned, I am almost sure I have gone outside of it) I do not think it is quite the problem as it would be in your class seeing as yours is so large. The largest I have seen my class be is 8 people... but that was only like once. Typically it is 3 - 5 sometimes 6 people. In my class its a little weird though... I have seen some ask a question quite informally immidiately after the Sensei has told them what to do or after they finish doing what they were told to do and not being treated sternly over it... as I have also seen others go about it quite formally with the usage of the Japanese word (that I know how to say but not how to spell so I wont try it here) and the sensei acknowledgeing them and then they ask their question and say the other Japanese words that I am not gonna bother to spell (aragato goz......) when they are given an answer. So he does not appear to be entirely strict... but there is deffinately a line. I just kinda went wrong in that I asked my question very informally immediately *after* the sensei was trying to correct me, which I understand to not be good... but it just slips out. It was only after the last class that I did this that I started to become aware that a.) its not entirely appropriate and b.) I was the only one who did it.

Agreed... and I think that some might be missinterpreting my initial post in thinking that I dont take discipline well... I have no problems with the act of being disciplined... its just the fact that I needed the disciplining at all (and the first time not even realising that I was being "disciplined" at first) that some seem to have a problem with?? Meh. How do you know untill you are told?

yep.. most deffinately in your case you wouldnt wanna argue with that man. 'course... fair or not I'd think *most* senseis would be ever so slightly less apt to try to totally maim a female student the first time or two of her second guessing what she is supposed to be doing.... then again, I'm sure some wouldnt think twice about it either. In the end though I dont think it was ever made perfectly clear to me when I first started what would be "expected". I think he tends to guage people before he starts "demanding" (wrong word but still basically the same) any kind of respect from them... and really, even though I do intend to "fall in line" so to speak now, I think my respect for him now is actually more genuine than if a feigned level had been forced from the get-go. Also I have a tendency to be *very* quiet and shy untill I get to know people.... and once I feel comfortable enough I kinda *leap* out of my shell. So because most of my focus in the beginning classes were on basics and kata... I really had to reason to talk at all... but recently the "sparring" stuff has started becoming more frequent I've learned that I'm gonna have to learn to zippit a bit more Oh and good luck with your child bearing potential

Oh I'm sure. Its like I'm just now clueing in to what may be "expected" of me. But correct me if I'm wrong but it seems by your post that your instructor doesnt even allow questions durring the actual class? Is that right or have I just overanalyzed what you said or something?

Yeah, I think it was just a matter of missunderstanding on this one... I may not have worded my question so clearly during class... y'know cus I was busy rubbing my neck and gasping for air (kidding). Also I dont think "self deffence" was actually his "main" focus (though I'm sure it was one of his goals) for this particular lesson. I do believe he just wanted a good example to practice a very particular basic move on... as it turned out though it just wouldnt be a move that someone my size should use for self deffence IMO. Cant take that the wrong way... it is "usually" true. Sensei did go into this very same lil speach in fact during that very class. I will probably only take it the wrong way if too much focus is put on that lil fact to the point that some think women can't do what they are perfectly capable of... "slightly" weaker or not. He did show me some technical problems with what I was doing, so its not like I was doing it perfectly fine right off or anything either... and while his hands wernt wrapped around my neck, I agreed to his corrections .... so it very well might still be that I simply wasnt doing it right and even though I "tried" to incorporate his suggestions I may have still just *spazzed out* (for me it seems being joint locked, punched, kicked or thrown to the floor doesnt even compare with being choked) when the moment came... Guess it'll take a while for me to really know.

I'm not sure of the exact break up of classes but Im pretty sure there are at least four age brackets with the last two being 12-16 and 16 and over

Oh... sooooo true. A few classes back we were working on getting out of a choke hold and there were two other white belts that were working with me (guys) who were taking turns "choking" me... well of course being human, they didnt want to hurt me so they never got me too hard... Sensei of course told them to do it "almost" for real so that I got a feel for how I might truely react in such a case... while they did go slightly harder.. not near hard enough. So, sensei decided to show them what he meant... on me of course. When he grabbed hold of my neck it scared the absolute bejeezus out of me the first time and I barely even tried to do what I was supposed to... second time I really tried... and third and fourth... as it turns out, I am either just not strong enough in my arms to get out of such a hold with the move he wanted me to... or I get a little too freaked out to do that particular move (while running out of air anyway). I did try to ask what I should do about it and I think he missunderstood me or something and he just told me different ways to strengthen my arms instead of telling me an alternative move, but I just let that one go. Which lead me to believe that I'd probably be a lot better off just kicking the "attacker" in the groin instead (though I chose not to do this to the sensei of course )

Bwahahah

Oh I see. Yes its more of a second or two after it leaves my lips and especially after I see the senseis facial expression where I realise that oops maybe I should have, at the very least, worded it differently... if not, not said it at all.... and times like now were I look back and analyze it a bit more, which lead to the initial post. Ah yes. I do believe that to be a big difference between "children" students and those that have "grown up" in the MAs" and adult students that have just started. Children will find most teachers of anything a tad intimidating... I know I did (was a very shy child) especially Teachers who they know can beat them up but as adults we tend to be less frightend... and in the end know that "hey, if we dont like being talked to or treated a certain way, we can always just quit!" so we go into it with a slightly different attitude... even if unitentionally so. Which is not to say that I have had any problem with the way I have been talked to or treated. I hope so anyway.

I actually agree with your whole assessment of the situation. I am a girl who never really got involved in any kind of sports as a child due to a few different physical problems/lazyness (diagnosed with diabetes at 3, appendectomy at 13, spinal surgery at 16, dislocated shoulder 2 weeks after the spinal surgery, kidney stone at 21 (though I guess thats not really a big deal) and dislocated the other shoulder at 23) so I tended to stay away from any kind of organised sports and therefore I am slowly understanding the idea of being "coached" (wrong word but I think you get my point) now because its really not something Ive ever experienced befor now. Though I believe MA demands a little more "discipline" and etiquette along the lines of respect than most other sports. I'm getting there... I'm just having a rocky start

glad to know I am not alone. Though you are correct in that because of the personal relationship you have with your "instructors" it does indeed make the situations quite a bit different.