I'm torn between two decisions...

[FangPwnsAll7]

At class yesterday, my dad asked if I could test early to save money. My instructor said that he will watch me in class and then decide. He kept calling out my mistakes and making them obvious. He said, "What makes you think I'll let you test early if you can't even do a low knife hand block?" It was embarrassing to me that he was calling out my mistakes. I feel like the instructor is treating me different because my dad suggested that I test early. I really was upset that he was calling out my mistakes and telling me that I can't do any of the combinations. My dad is letting me choose to go to this one with the instructor or the other dojo. I do like the instructor better at the one I started back at today. I have friends at both dojos. You're probably asking yourself why I am torn between the two dojos. Well, there are students who were a bit mean and disrespectful when I used to go there. Yes, I attended both dojos... I just can't decide if I should go back to the old instructor or stick with the one I transferred to. I'm kind of leaning towards going to the old one I started at originally. I went to one class at the old one (I haven't been there for four months) and I liked it. I really liked it. I am really leaning towards returning to the one I started at, but I don't want to regret it later. Any help would be appreciated. Like, what would you choose to do and why?

[Nidan Melbourne]

First off how old are you? Just so I can vary my answer. Sounds like you are fairly young since your dad gave you a choice.

Did you feel ready to test or not?

Do you pay to grade or is it in your tuition fees?

Realistically I have found if you are torn between two dojo's then go with the one that you trained at secondly. BUT if you feel uncomfortable training at both then leave both and train somewhere else. That way you don't have to choose between the two.

In the past i have trained at two dojo's but at one i only did once or twice every couple of weeks, due to the cost.

If you have to choose one of the two schools maybe go with the one you like the most and learn the most at but still won't break the bank.

[FangPwnsAll7]

I am 16. I didn't feel as if I was ready

[Nidan Melbourne]

ok. Did you try explaining to him that you didn't feel ready?

I get why he suggested it, but seems like he didn't think of how you felt

[mal103]

It is the Sensei's job to tell you when you are ready to grade, your dad was wrong to ask and the Sensei made their point (probably too much) by calling out your mistakes.

Cost is a big consideration but you should try to choose the Dojo that offers the best standard and that you feel comfortable training at. You may be treated better at one but that doesn't mean it's the best Dojo.

It sounds like they are both open to you training where you want and returning, this is something that you can do at any time, trying to train at both early on may be confusing so wait until way after black belt before trying that.

If you want to go back to the old Dojo then you need to address the problem of mean and disrespectful students, bring it to the attention of the Sensei as they may not be aware, most would stamp out that behaviour immediately. If they allow it to happen then move Dojo.

Maybe also have a word with Dad as well....

[guird]

If you don't like either of them you should have a look around and see if you can find some other place you can train. Most places let you try a lesson first, so you can keep training where you are now until you decide.

If there aren't any more Tang Soo Do dojangs near you, you could look for similar styles (japanese forms of karate or taekwondo for example), and if you don't find one of those that you like, cast your net a little further.

[Zaine]

If there are reasons that you don't want to be at either then I would suggest a new dojo all together. However, given the two choices you presented, I would go with your original dojo. Problem students can be handled by bringing it to the attention of the Sensei. Big egos are going to be around regardless of where you go. However, a Sensei who is the problem probably will be less likely to change their attitude.

[Wastelander]

I remember when you were debating leaving your old dojang, and I believe it sounded very cult-like. I don't see returning to that environment as being a good idea, unless things have changed a great deal. This particular situation sounds like the instructor was trying to illustrate that you aren't ready to test yet, and shouldn't be asking to test early. Probably a little too bluntly, but some instructors are that way.

[sensei8]

Yes, it maybe the Sensei's job to tell you when you're ready for the next testing cycle, however, it's your journey, and not your Sensei's. If you feel that you're not ready, respectfully refuse to test UNTIL YOU FEEL that you're ready. Any instructor complete in their totality will not have a problem with your refusal to not test as suggested.

I've never been forced nor have I ever forced one of my students to test if they felt that they weren't quite ready. Yes, students will refuse until they feel that they're ready, and when they're feel that they're ready, and end up failing for one reason or another.

Calling out corrections is the job of the Sensei/CI, however, there's an appropriate way of dong that without demoralizing a student. One of the things that need to be consistent in calling out corrections is to not attack the student personally, instead of addressing the corrections that need to be done and how...in a professional manner!

Choice which one increases your MA betterment!!

Hang in there, you'll be fine!!

[Lupin1]

I remember when you were debating leaving your old dojang, and I believe it sounded very cult-like. I don't see returning to that environment as being a good idea, unless things have changed a great deal. This particular situation sounds like the instructor was trying to illustrate that you aren't ready to test yet, and shouldn't be asking to test early. Probably a little too bluntly, but some instructors are that way.

Exactly what I was going to say.

I remember that you were incredibly unhappy at your old dojo and it seemed like a harmful environment for you. Have things changed there since you left? New instructors? Certain students leaving? If so, maybe it will be different, but if not, you need to really consider why you left in the first place.

Maybe speak to your new instructor about how it embarrasses and discourages you when he calls you out in front of all the other students and how you would appreciate it if he would speak to you in private about what he thinks you could improve upon. Does he do this to all the students, or is it just you?

I also agree that it may be a good idea to start trying some other dojos and seeing what else is out there.