Afraid to spar.

[ps1]

This whole story is very strange to me. Someone makes accidental contact so you got a free shot? With a knee strike? You need to leave this academy immediately. Your instructor isn't qualified. That's my professional opinion.

To allow anyone who is new and has very little control throw a knee strike into anyone else as "payback" is neglectful at best.

Next, learn your anatomy. You're thinking you hit in the ribs. But what should concern you is what's under the ribs. Most people move to their opponent's right side and bring in the knee. This is because most people naturally carry their right side in the back (right handed). This means your knee strike, while connecting with the ribs, would actually be a liver shot. This is one of the most painful things a person can experience.

It's not on you. You didn't know. But it's clear that your "sensei" doesn't understand the importance of taking care of training partners and students.

Leave immediately and find another place to train.

My $0.02

[DWx]

It's hard with these types of posts for any of us to say what happened... we weren't there. However from what you are saying, I would agree that her groin shot was probably accidental and made light contact? As she too is effectively a beginner this seems pretty likely to me and it doesn't exactly take much to cause someone pain in that area.

I also agree that it was wrong to knee her in the ribs. An eye for an eye doesn't really work in the dojo. Again without knowing much about your sensei it's hard to say, but if he told you to seriously get her back, that's IMHO a bad school and a bad teacher. If it was a lighthearted comment in jest, you shouldn't have attacked her.

That's my 2 cents anyway.

[Kanku65]

This is a tough one... My Sensei always says that if someone strikes you too hard in class you have every right to strike them back just as hard. He'll then say "you're not allowed to hit them back, but technically it is your right." This being said, if someone strikes you hard, and you strike them back in vengeance, there will be consequences. An issue of accidental hard contact is one thing, repeat offense is another. So, instead of hurting someone back, push their boundaries, challenge them to go faster, scare them in a way, and in doing so you push your own boundaries. You should always be out of your comfort zone while sparring, if you aren't, you won't learn anything. As a brown belt, I've been light freestyle sparring with the yellow belts quite often recently. By the end of our matches I usually find that they've become comfortable enough to challenge offensively and mix up their striking combinations. This for me is the best feeling ever. I've been kicked in the testicles 4 times in the past year, all by brown belts and above. This for me is the worst feeling ever.

[TheGrim123321]

This whole story is very strange to me. Someone makes accidental contact so you got a free shot? With a knee strike? You need to leave this academy immediately. Your instructor isn't qualified. That's my professional opinion.

To allow anyone who is new and has very little control throw a knee strike into anyone else as "payback" is neglectful at best.

Next, learn your anatomy. You're thinking you hit in the ribs. But what should concern you is what's under the ribs. Most people move to their opponent's right side and bring in the knee. This is because most people naturally carry their right side in the back (right handed). This means your knee strike, while connecting with the ribs, would actually be a liver shot. This is one of the most painful things a person can experience.

It's not on you. You didn't know. But it's clear that your "sensei" doesn't understand the importance of taking care of training partners and students.

Leave immediately and find another place to train.

My $0.02

About him not being qualified his primary student has won Nationals 3 times. My sensei has won countless fights. And that dojo is the only place within a 6 hour drive were I can train. And theres only 3 kids in my class me the girl and a guy the rarley ever goes. Theres a brown belt and my sensei.

[Wastelander]

About him not being qualified his primary student has won Nationals 3 times. My sensei has won countless fights. And that dojo is the only place within a 6 hour drive were I can train. And theres only 3 kids in my class me the girl and a guy the rarley ever goes. Theres a brown belt and my sensei.

There is more to being a good/qualified instructor than winning fights and having students who win fights, and looking out for students' safety is part of it. Of course, as DWx said, we weren't there so we don't know how your instructor said it--it may very well have been a comment made in jest. Either way, though, I stand by my assertion that beginners shouldn't be sparring each other until they've learned to control themselves by sparring with more advanced students. You say you have a brown belt and your Sensei in class--spar with them.

[bushido_man96]

This whole story is very strange to me. Someone makes accidental contact so you got a free shot? With a knee strike? You need to leave this academy immediately. Your instructor isn't qualified. That's my professional opinion.

To allow anyone who is new and has very little control throw a knee strike into anyone else as "payback" is neglectful at best.

Next, learn your anatomy. You're thinking you hit in the ribs. But what should concern you is what's under the ribs. Most people move to their opponent's right side and bring in the knee. This is because most people naturally carry their right side in the back (right handed). This means your knee strike, while connecting with the ribs, would actually be a liver shot. This is one of the most painful things a person can experience.

It's not on you. You didn't know. But it's clear that your "sensei" doesn't understand the importance of taking care of training partners and students.

Leave immediately and find another place to train.

My $0.02

I tend to agree here. An accident shouldn't warrant a free shot like that, nor should it be encouraged by an instructor. I agree with ps1 here, that it is negligent on his part.

With that said, the Martial Arts are, by there very nature, a contact activity. At some point in time, you will receive a little present like this again, and likely even from someone who has exhibited excellent control on a regular basis.

The only response should be, "My, bad, you ok?" after the technique is finished. If they drop and cry, then stop your technique. Otherwise, finish it, and when you are done, mea culpa all you want. Otherwise, you get into a habit of stopping after you hurt someone; not a good habit.

About him not being qualified his primary student has won Nationals 3 times. My sensei has won countless fights. And that dojo is the only place within a 6 hour drive were I can train. And theres only 3 kids in my class me the girl and a guy the rarley ever goes. Theres a brown belt and my sensei.

Winning nationals doesn't equal good instruction. There is more to being a good instructor than being a tournament winner. Being able to teach is a gift in and of itself, and not everyone can do it well. Now, I'm not saying he doesn't teach well, but if he tells you to take a shot back after an accident, it raises questions in my mind. Maybe he teaches well otherwise. But if this becomes the norm in training, then rue the day that you accidentally knick someone in the nuts....because who knows what's coming back at you, right? Just something to ponder.

[Archimoto]

This whole story is very strange to me. Someone makes accidental contact so you got a free shot? With a knee strike? You need to leave this academy immediately. Your instructor isn't qualified. That's my professional opinion.

To allow anyone who is new and has very little control throw a knee strike into anyone else as "payback" is neglectful at best.

Next, learn your anatomy. You're thinking you hit in the ribs. But what should concern you is what's under the ribs. Most people move to their opponent's right side and bring in the knee. This is because most people naturally carry their right side in the back (right handed). This means your knee strike, while connecting with the ribs, would actually be a liver shot. This is one of the most painful things a person can experience.

It's not on you. You didn't know. But it's clear that your "sensei" doesn't understand the importance of taking care of training partners and students.

Leave immediately and find another place to train.

My $0.02

I tend to agree here. An accident shouldn't warrant a free shot like that, nor should it be encouraged by an instructor. I agree with ps1 here, that it is negligent on his part.

With that said, the Martial Arts are, by there very nature, a contact activity. At some point in time, you will receive a little present like this again, and likely even from someone who has exhibited excellent control on a regular basis.

The only response should be, "My, bad, you ok?" after the technique is finished. If they drop and cry, then stop your technique. Otherwise, finish it, and when you are done, mea culpa all you want. Otherwise, you get into a habit of stopping after you hurt someone; not a good habit.

About him not being qualified his primary student has won Nationals 3 times. My sensei has won countlesbs fights. And that dojo is the only place within a 6 hour drive were I can train. And theres only 3 kids in my class me the girl and a guy the rarley ever goes. Theres a brown belt and my sensei.

Winning nationals doesn't equal good instruction. There is more to being a good instructor than being a tournament winner. Being able to teach is a gift in and of itself, and not everyone can do it well. Now, I'm not saying he doesn't teach well, but if he tells you to take a shot back after an accident, it raises questions in my mind. Maybe he teaches well otherwise. But if this becomes the norm in training, then rue the day that you accidentally knick someone in the nuts....because who knows what's coming back at you, right? Just something to ponder.

This, along with a few other posts, hits the nail on the head. Your dojo, or dojang, or studio is a lot like your family. You're there to learn and grow together and the environment should be one of nurturing and development. If someone makes a mistake, step back and learn from it. For example in this situation: 1. Invest in a groin protector, 2. Ask your partner to be more careful, and 3. Learn to get over it until it happens again. Then if it happens again perhaps it's an opportunity to talk with your classmate about it. Regardless, I'm a big believer in training hard and practicing at a high level of contact when it's mutual or part of the drill. However, you should NEVER strike a classmate as payback for a mistake. It's disrespectful to your classmates and to the process of learning in general. I actually feel strongly about that. Just my opinion tho.

[guird]

I see two problems:

A: no groin guard. Even if you're sparring light, groin guards are a must. Bruised bits are no fun, and I actually know someone who had their testicle ruptured by mistake during point sparring.

B: Get Payback? It was an accidental strike, and paying back something unsafe with something unsafe is simply twice as unsafe. Are you sure your sensei didn't just mean that you should best her at sparring rather than inflict pain?

[ps1]

This whole story is very strange to me. Someone makes accidental contact so you got a free shot? With a knee strike? You need to leave this academy immediately. Your instructor isn't qualified. That's my professional opinion.

To allow anyone who is new and has very little control throw a knee strike into anyone else as "payback" is neglectful at best.

Next, learn your anatomy. You're thinking you hit in the ribs. But what should concern you is what's under the ribs. Most people move to their opponent's right side and bring in the knee. This is because most people naturally carry their right side in the back (right handed). This means your knee strike, while connecting with the ribs, would actually be a liver shot. This is one of the most painful things a person can experience.

It's not on you. You didn't know. But it's clear that your "sensei" doesn't understand the importance of taking care of training partners and students.

Leave immediately and find another place to train.

My $0.02

About him not being qualified his primary student has won Nationals 3 times. My sensei has won countless fights. And that dojo is the only place within a 6 hour drive were I can train. And theres only 3 kids in my class me the girl and a guy the rarley ever goes. Theres a brown belt and my sensei.

As a general rule, the number of students in a school is a good indicator of the quality. Of course, there are exceptions. There are some out there that truly don't want a large school and only accept a few students. Those instructors usually teach out of their homes and not in groups.

"Winning nationals" is a very subjective thing these days. There are literally hundreds of tournaments throughout the US each year that call themselves "Nationals." If I counted all of them then I am like a 30 time national champ. I was young once and bought into all this kind of hype, but 30 years of martial arts training has taught me better. I'm just handing you a piece of my experience.

I don't know where you live, and there's no reason for you to divulge, but martial arts schools are very common. Even in very small towns, there are usually two or three. But who knows, if you live in a very rural area, he might just be the only game in town...which draws further suspicion as to why his school would be so small.

I'm sorry that my posts about this are negative. But there's no way I'm going to agree your instructor is a qualified teacher, or even a well adjusted human being, if what you described in your OP is the full story. My recommendation is to get out and try wrestling until such time that you are able to find a better place to train.

At this point, your instructor has taught you that assault of a weaker person is okay. It's not. It's bullying and it's wrong.

Again, my $0.02

[mal103]

Lots of good advice given, hope it helps.

I have said something similar when teaching but in total jest! I was trying to get students to lift their legs in the first part of the front kick so I got their partners to kneel down in front of them, I informed them that if they didn't raise their legs enough and kicked their partners then it was their turn next...

I haven't won trophies and train under extremely good Sensei that haven't won trophies, makes no difference.

Personally I will only get lower grades to perform Kumite drills that will only give them sore forearms or maybe shins, never to aim at vital or soft parts of their partners body. Even later on there are still targets that are off limits, it's tricky as in a real situation you would want them to hit these areas first.

Keep training but DO NOT retaliate, even if the guy with the Black belt says it's okay - this goes against the grain of MA full stop - or period for the US!

Keep all Kumite under control, can you imagine if you were testing each others stomach muscles by punching in the gut, then found out that your partner lost a baby? Shocking thought maybe, but hit a punchbag hard, try the techniques on a partner with FULL control but hit an attacker the hardest.