MMoudry Posted April 14, 2004 Posted April 14, 2004 Another one, proclaim youself as the great master of the style you are practicing in front of everyone, immediately promote yourself to the 10th dan and start giving class using yin and yang clichès. 1.st kyu Shotokan Karate1.st dan Aikido
aefibird Posted April 18, 2004 Posted April 18, 2004 How about... Refuse to talk to anyone but orange belts for a whole class. The next class talk to everyone else BUT the orange belts. Keep asking for 'help' to tie your belt (only works if you're not a beginner and actually do need help to tie your belt!!) If you do more than one style keep saying, "well in my other club we do it this way..." Ask everyone to refer to you as 'san' after they say your name, in the manner of 'Daniel-san' (from Karate Kid). Declare yourself to be a 10th dan in a secret style only known to one other person in the world and claim that you're really a martial arts master but you like 'slumming it' with the plebs in the lower grade classes. Challange your instructor to a fight and pull out at the last minute by telling him you don't want to fight because you don't want to hurt him... Crack your knuckles loudly at every possible opportunity (could be substituted for any other annoying bad habit). Keep asking in the middle of class if you can go to the toilet. Declare loudly to your fellow students that you think "Sensei's technique has really gone downhill lately". Turn up to class without your gi and say that you sent it to Japan/China (wherever your art is from) to learn the secret techniques of the Way of the Gi. "Was it really worth it? Only time and death may ever tell..." The Beautiful South - The Rose of My CologneSheffield Steelers!
aefibird Posted April 18, 2004 Posted April 18, 2004 Just thought of another few - Kiai at the end of every sentence.Kiai! Perform your kata like it is being shown in slow motion on the TV - with a long slow drawn out kiiiiaaaaiiiiii. Rush out suddenly in the middle of a class decalring that you have to get back to the psychiatric ward for your medication or else you'll turn into a werewolf. When using a heavy bag stop all your kicks and punches a couple of inches short of the bag. Claim you're doing this because you don't want to hurt it. "Was it really worth it? Only time and death may ever tell..." The Beautiful South - The Rose of My CologneSheffield Steelers!
monkeygirl Posted April 18, 2004 Author Posted April 18, 2004 I'm liking the flying-sidekick/rolling/screaming/barechested guy thing Girls should probably go with a Chun-Li look a la Street Fighter. http://cps2burn.emuunlim.com/rips/pfchunanim.gif 1st dan & Asst. Instructor TKD 2000-2003No matter the tune...if you can rock it, rock it hard.
GrrrArg Posted June 20, 2004 Posted June 20, 2004 "Monkeygirl, Nah I don't mind if they don't mind.... slober slober slober." Quote taking from "How to get kicked off KForums" by Grand SuperSoakey Doakey Master NinjaMonk GrrrArg
vertigo Posted December 14, 2004 Posted December 14, 2004 wow, for some reason, i just discovered the humor board a few days ago... where do you guys come up with some of this stuff?? I wouldn't necessarily say our dojo (i.e. university club) is really laid back, but I know its definently not dead serious.. (even though I've never been to another dojo , as i only started 3 months ago) ...if asked to spar then say no your not worth my time i only spar 7thdan and above lol this one would probably be asking to get my a** kicked though, as our sensei is a 7th dan... and I have a pretty safe guess my 8th kyu blocks wouldn't last long "Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go." - T. S. Eliot
eggdropsoup Posted December 18, 2004 Posted December 18, 2004 iim not sure but maybe you can go and fart on him. if you want to get demoted thats a good thing to do.
eggdropsoup Posted December 18, 2004 Posted December 18, 2004 iim not sure but maybe you can go and fart on him. if you want to get demoted thats a good thing to do. it will also piss him off pretty badly!
Goju 4 Life Posted December 18, 2004 Posted December 18, 2004 I'm envisioning doing some of these things to my instructors. And now I envision myself lying in a growing pool of blood If i had to choose between karate and everything else, I would choose karate so i could beat up whoever made me make the decision and have everything else
KarateChick06 Posted December 19, 2004 Posted December 19, 2004 My senseis are very relaxed and friendly. I've shaving-creamed and TPed their cars on 2 separate April Fool's Days, and all they did was laugh and threaten to get us next April Fool's Day. DORKS HAVE MORE FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Savvy?
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