Assaulted and Knocked out!

[white owl]

I am so sorry kez that this happen to you but this is not your fault and you need to quit blaming yourself, I know it is easier said then done, but you do.

As a martial artiest we try to train are self for every scenario possible and hope that when the time comes that we will be able to pull it off but sometimes it does not always work that way. Being a martial artist is always a learning experience just like life. But you live, you learn. What I mean by this is that you take this experience and use it as a teaching method so maybe you can help some one else who might be but in a similar situation as what you were in.

[bushido_man96]

Lastly, and this is so elementary that it really dosn't need said, but you'd be suprised how often it's overlooked, this is not an action on your part that hurt your friends. Nor any act of omission on your part. It's purely, as far as I can tell, the actions of those who you walked up to. It's on them, not you. As you're doing your own de-breif on the incident remember that.

I'll second this, for sure. Never take the blame for someone else's actions. That gets you no where, and leaves you accepting blame that you don't deserve. If you start down this road, its a long ways bad, and you'll never do anything again without taking into account the guilt that could result, even if you can't control it.

With that aside, I am glad to hear that you are ok, Keri. Seeing as you blacked out, things could have ended up a lot worse. I'm glad that it didn't.

It sounds to me like you were blindsided. Not much training can help prepare you for the blindside attack.

Like some of the other have mentioned, working more on situational awareness can help to prepare you for these things better. Keep an eye around you, looking to your flanks to see if someone else is coming in to the fray.

Lastly, don't feel so ashamed to not return to Karate, let alone test. Keep going, keep training, and keep fighting the good fight. Learn from it, and you will get past this, I am positive.

Keep your chin up, Keri.

[Shotokan-kez]

Thanks a lot everyone, means a lot to me. Brian i see where your coming from, i think i was blindsided, because i literally saw nothing...just felt pain and this is why my statement to the police is a little weak. We do have witnessess but the police haven't said what they saw, weather they saw all three attacks or just one. We are hoping that the CCTV was pointing in the right direction at the time.

I managed to drag myself off to karate last night, i had to have someone drive me there and bring me home because i couldn't face getting the bus alone. Just goes to show how important karate is too me because i let rip, i worked really hard...unfortunatly giving myself a headache. My sensei was really good, he was making fun telling the class that it's drunken kung fu tonight for a change and Kerry was going to teach it.

I'm still feeling very fragile, and cried again last night after waking from a bad dream. Seems i only feel safe in the dojo. Everytime i feel a twinge from my injuries it reminds me. I'm just so glad the police have caught these guys, and im keeping my fingers crossed that they get proper punishment and not just a fine and community service.

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate your input and support.

Kerry x

[white owl]

I also agree with tallgeese and bushido_man and I am so glad that you return to karate. I hope they get the proper punishment that they deserve, also.

You are most diffidently welcome and any time.

[RW]

Kez... you are a small woman.

What are 3 guys hitting on a woman doing? They're thugs.

You should not question your skills for not being able to take out 3 thugs. Hey, maybe not even an MMA fighter would have done that much better than you, considering that what you described was basically a sealthy, cheap shot.

Your MA training will make you the best fighter you can be. The best Kez you can be. There is no reason to leave that. Be the best you can be.

Don't risk yourself next time, though, I mean, martial arts or not, a woman fighting as man is never a good idea. And even if it was, just to make an analogy, you won't take a bullet just because you got a bulletproof vest that can protect you, right?

Feel good knowing that your skill is a thousand times better than it'd be without the training, and it will keep improving to unsuspected levels.

[RW]

Kez... you are a small woman.

What are 3 guys hitting on a woman doing? They're thugs.

You should not question your skills for not being able to take out 3 thugs. Hey, maybe not even an MMA fighter would have done that much better than you, considering that what you described was basically a sealthy, cheap shot.

Your MA training will make you the best fighter you can be. The best Kez you can be. There is no reason to leave that. Be the best you can be.

Don't risk yourself next time, though, I mean, martial arts or not, a woman fighting as man is never a good idea. And even if it was, just to make an analogy, you won't take a bullet just because you got a bulletproof vest that can protect you, right?

Feel good knowing that your skill is a thousand times better than it'd be without the training, and it will keep improving to unsuspected levels.

Let me rephrase myself. I you were a 7'0 man proficient in Karate, Jiu Jitsu, Muay Thai and Krav Magna, you should still not think about taking on 3 goons on the street just like that.

[joesteph]

I'm now trying to move on but having difficulties forgetting....i just keep asking myself why why why??

I feel you're asking the philosophical question, "Why do bad things happen to good people?" It's like when my son David was born, was in the NICU with his brother Patrick, and both were receiving IVs. David received an IV burn. Why? Why this helpless infant, who bears the scar till today? There will never be a satisfactory answer as to "Why?" because we live in a complex world with so many variables that, unfortunately, we find that life has a harsh and random side that even good people run into.

Why us . . .

Life is strangely impersonal. You were not selected to encounter this. It's part of the randomness of life. None of you did something to "deserve" this. You are all free of malice, something your attackers cannot claim about themselves. They live by the sword, and I am certain that, one day, they will die by it.

You need time to heal, Kez, and, speaking as someone very familiar with anxiety, you must work to avoid creating a habit of negative thinking about this that has you blaming yourself for the crime, and attacking your self-worth, your self-esteem. Persons who experience anxiety are not only highly sensitive individuals in dealing with others, but are often quite hard on themselves--harder than an objective individual would be.

You enjoyed class before. You can enjoy it again. I'm no psychologist, but sometimes just driving by, walking by, stopping in to visit, deciding to sit and watch, putting the gi on at home and considering . . . all these "baby steps" can be surprisingly helpful.

Good luck with your recovery, Kez.

[Kuma]

It's unfortunate that things happen like this sometimes, but in this situation from what you told us it sounds like you did nothing wrong. You and your friends were just having a good time, you got a bit tipsy, and were sucker punched by some jerk from the sound of it.

Being sucker punched or even knocked out is nothing to be ashamed of. We all are martial artists here and have skills the average Joe does not, but that still doesn't make us invulnerable or superhuman. Sure some people are tough and can fight well, but there's always someone tougher and badder.

Where to go from here? I don't think you should necessarily give up MA now due to one encounter. You have an edge many MAists don't: you realize violence CAN occur to you and it doesn't matter if you're a black belt or an untrained person, you can still get defeated. Knowing this, you have a big advantage as now you have motivation. Motivation to know that the next time you might not be quite so lucky. I apologize if it sounds a bit extreme, but I'm hoping it helps some.

[nacal]

Sorry to hear bout the incident Kez, its not pleasant, I have been king hit a few times before as well.

It sounds you have a great dojo and a caring and understanding sensei, which would be the best place to get back on your feet.

If you train hard, focus on your training you will not be able to think about what happened that night.

your life may seem pretty dark right now, but martial arts will make it much more bearable.

[Shotokan-kez]

Thank you everyone. I'm in much higher spirits now, i guess i'm just left feeling a little angry now. Although i am managing to train well, everyone has been really cool and supportive.

My head is still a little sore in the places i was hit. Sometimes i forget and i will have an itch or when i wash my hair, it's like 'ouch!'

Anyway my Nidan grading is next sunday and i'm focusing on that, thanks again guys