Karate for my fiesty boy..good idea or not?

[Shotokan-kez]

Hey guys i'm looking for a little advice. My little boy Ethan is very fiesty and lively and has lots of energy to burn..he is also a little rough with his brother at home and the other boys in the playground at school. Today after picking him up from school his teacher came out to tell me that he had hurt a fellow pupil in the playground, it was totally unacceptable to the point that the boy had bleeding to his ear.

Of course Ethan has been punished by school and by myself but i am wondering if allowing him to take part in the kids classes would help channel his energy in some way, on the other hand i don't know if it will make him worse.

Another reason why i think it may be a good idea is because when i train he always wants to come and watch. He sits with my partner at the back but he copies everything we do at the back of the class. It's quite sweet really watching him do this, as he always asks to take part but i always say no because of his age (although we do have kids of his age in the kids class). Ethan will be 5 in January.

Any feedback on this would be greatly appreciated. Thanks guys.

Kez x

[tallgeese]

I've had good luck with mine training. She is 5 as well and pretty rough and tumble; of course, she's been wrestling with dad since she could crawl. One of her favorite games with me is "escape the guard".

It's actually been benifical for her and she's taken it to heart a bit. So far, no problems with her hittting other kids at school. At that age, it's important to stress restraint and place restrictions on when they can be hitting things. It's really more like a game to them at that level anyway.

You canalways give it a go and see how he handles it and go from there. It's worth a try.

[joesteph]

My little boy Ethan is very fiesty and lively and has lots of energy to burn.

Sounds completely normal--and fun to be with--to me.

[H]e is also a little rough with his brother at home and the other boys in the playground at school. . . .

He has yet to learn the boundaries. Children who reach out and find the boundaries, often by getting into a bit of trouble, usually grow up with healthier outlooks on what they can do than self-limiting children, who are those that set where they think the boundary is--well within a safe zone.

. . . i am wondering if allowing him to take part in the kids classes would help channel his energy in some way . . .

An excellent idea. Have Ethan in a setting that is dynamic and yet encourages self-discipline. He'll work with others while expending youthful energy, and he'll find that there is a way to be his energetic self with a positive outcome.

Another reason why i think it may be a good idea is because when i train he always wants to come and watch. . . .

[H]e copies everything we do at the back of the class. . . .

[H]e always asks to take part . . .

Shotokan, you've got to let Ethan give it "the old college try." (I know, he's only five, but a little hyperbole now and then won't hurt.)

Have fun, Ethan!

[Shotokan-kez]

Aww thanks for those replies We have a kids class on a saturday afternoon, although they do train there is a real fun element too, i think it will be beneficial to him. I can always help with the teaching too if needs be to keep an eye on him.

[bushido_man96]

Use it as a tool as well; tell him that if he can demonstrate some control at school with the other kids, then you'll let him start training.

At any rate, I'd say let him start. Just see if you can get him to understand to control himself some more, especially if he is going to be learning some more moves.

[BLueDevil]

First off, my son is also named Ethan! *High five* lol He just turned 6 months old =)

Back on topic: I would let him try, also like Bushido_man said use it as a tool, if he acts up no training. Though I really think how you described him he has alot of energy and probably needs an outlet so this IMO would be great for him. It should also help with the roughhousing.

Also another fun activity for him would be swimming(enrolling him in lessons etc), gets alot of energy out as well, plus its good exercise that will wear him out a bit.

[Shotokan-kez]

Yay Bluedevil "high five" to the Etan's!

Ok i will take him to saturday class and see how he gets on. Swimming is a good idea his dad takes him sometimes but unfortunatly he's in the army so he cant help out as much. I will have to see how much swimming lessons are and put him on the waiting list. Thanks again guys

[tori]

Shotokan, I hope you did take Ethan to classes. It will definitely benefit him. He will learn when he is allowed to use force and when he is not allowed. Just one suggestion, I would not participate in assisting in classes. Let him have his time with the head instructor. His focus will be better and his response to the instructor will be more appropriate. Ethan is very young and he will not seperate mommy at the dojo from mommy at home. We have had parents teaching or assisting with their own children at our dojo and 9 times out of 10, those kids would not listen to anyone, including the head instructor. The children see mom or dad there and when confronted by another authority figure, the child thinks, "you are not my mom/dad." My instructor has actually now prohibited parents from taking or assisting in classes that their children take. I didnt think it would make a difference in the behavior of the child, but is really did.

[Shotokan-kez]

I haven't had the chance to take him yet because he has been spending the saturdays with his dad. Thanks for the advice Tori i will keep it in mind.

[white owl]

Shotokan, I hope you did take Ethan to classes. It will definitely benefit him. He will learn when he is allowed to use force and when he is not allowed. Just one suggestion, I would not participate in assisting in classes. Let him have his time with the head instructor. His focus will be better and his response to the instructor will be more appropriate. Ethan is very young and he will not seperate mommy at the dojo from mommy at home. We have had parents teaching or assisting with their own children at our dojo and 9 times out of 10, those kids would not listen to anyone, including the head instructor. The children see mom or dad there and when confronted by another authority figure, the child thinks, "you are not my mom/dad." My instructor has actually now prohibited parents from taking or assisting in classes that their children take. I didnt think it would make a difference in the behavior of the child, but is really did.

I do agree with Tori on this one. I have also seen this with children to, they look to their parents to get there ok before doing anything, or just having parents interference, (I use to be one , until I seeen that he does better if I leave him alone and I had it happen to me when I instructed class I found out that it is pretty rude and it feels awfull and I have appologised to my sensei 10 folds now I bite my tongue an boy does it bleed)and as a parent we seem to be hard on our kids when we help or instruct class, so I recommend you not to help, at least for a little while.