Male VS Female sparring matches-PLEASE advise

[Rychi]

When I was in karate class, They partnered me up with a girl, she was around my age but she was also about 4 belt grades higher (doesn't really mean much though, I was yellow belt and won against red belted, taller, bigger men...) I just stood there, I didn't want to punch or hurt her, but she had no problem hitting me! haha I got taught to never hit girls.. unless she's coming at me with intent to do harm, I'm going to stick by that!

But if you have to, just try roundhousing :D:D

[Lee M]

Always awkward - countering is a good strategy and just working on skills rather than trying to win.

[kiaikid]

As a girl who does BJJ and stand up karate, I can say at first, it can be a bit awkward. But, if this girl wants to continue martial arts, she better get over it lol. I learned that pretty fast. Obviously, if someone is intentionally doing things you find awkward, then mentioning this calmly would be a heck of alot better than yelling and all that- I mean, where I do martial arts, yelling is NOT a virtue

It's just a part of martial arts. You WILL get hit, grabbed, and put in close proximity of others- and if you're a girl, more often then not it will be by a guy.

[UselessDave]

When I was in karate class, They partnered me up with a girl, she was around my age but she was also about 4 belt grades higher (doesn't really mean much though, I was yellow belt and won against red belted, taller, bigger men...) I just stood there, I didn't want to punch or hurt her, but she had no problem hitting me! haha I got taught to never hit girls.. unless she's coming at me with intent to do harm, I'm going to stick by that!

But if you have to, just try roundhousing :D:D

Oh no no no.. That is not the best thing to do. How in the world would a person help that girl to train by giving no opposition at all.

[MasterPain]

Coddling anyone is disrespectful and counter productive. Go easy enough to not cause injury and hard enough to have realism. I was taught not to hit girls. That's why I never beat any of my girlfriends. Sparring is entirely different. In sparring you are learning to defend yourself against violence. To hit someone like a sissy hurts their skill development. So by being too easy and not providing a decent simulation of an assault, you are in a way responsible if she is ever hurt in an act of violence.

[shudokaratemomma]

As a girl who does BJJ and stand up karate, I can say at first, it can be a bit awkward. But, if this girl wants to continue martial arts, she better get over it lol. I learned that pretty fast. Obviously, if someone is intentionally doing things you find awkward, then mentioning this calmly would be a heck of alot better than yelling and all that- I mean, where I do martial arts, yelling is NOT a virtue

It's just a part of martial arts. You WILL get hit, grabbed, and put in close proximity of others- and if you're a girl, more often then not it will be by a guy.

As a female, I totally agree. She needs to get over the fact that she's gonna get hit in the chest, or anywhere else. Punching the chest and grabbing the chest are different, obviously. My advice would be to spar her like you would any other student of the same belt rank as she is. Martial Arts is a close contact sport at times. And as for her temper tantrum (or at least it sounds like it to me), she should be made aware that its not acceptable behavior.

[FangPwnsAll7]

It's always male VS female at my school, for some reason. No matter the gender, the sensei said you should go 'all out' and don't let them attack you.

[Nidan Melbourne]

The previous posts are all correct on this one. I especially agree with the last post from Lordtariel. The instructor may be trying to calm an easily offended student from making waves later. However, it is still not your fault. I would hesitate to punch a girl in the chest without a chest protector. But your opponent had one on. The whole point for this is so you do not have to fight differently with her. I think she's a big baby and will not do well in sparring if she does not change her attitude.

Also, I would tell the instructor (very soon) that you fought her as you would a guy since she had the protector and explain that you did not know the shot was not allowed. Then ask for an explanation of any rules he may have on sparring girls (or kids or lower ranks, etc.). This will keep you out of trouble plus it will let the teacher know this was just a mistake and not something mean or intentional toward the girl.

I agree with you on this.

I find it really strange how she expects you to avoid her "private" parts when sparring.

Its a martial art for crying out loud. every student of a MA expects to be hit everywhere. The girls in my classes that i train in don't care if they get hit in their 'private' parts aka breasts. and no one wears chest protectors in my school unless they have a chest injury.

I understand guys hesitate to hit girls because it is perceived to be wrong. but in martial arts how are girls going to learn how to defend themselves if they don't feel comfortable about being hit. and when they are hit they throw a massive tantrum.

But most females who do martial arts understand it is something they have to be comfortable with. especially if guys do try and feel them up and they have to learn how to prevent it from happening. and if they are getting attacked that they need to know what being under such pressure is like so they can perform their techniques well.

In Martial Arts everyone is equal so you can target wherever you would strike. I am a guy and i expect to be kicked in the groin when sparring (hence why we still wear cups to protect them) and that i should be able to protect them if i wasn't wearing a cup. so for girls you should be able to defend your breasts. Besides it helps you with distancing.

everyone don't forget that it isn't 100% of men will attack women. even if the percentage leans more against men who assault women, there is still a fair percentage of women who attack men.

I fight females majority of the time in class (as in my class there are about 6 females and 8 males) so we fight girls a lot. and they understand that when we punch we might do a movement that might graze their breasts but it isn't intentional.

many of us senior graded students in the adults class have two distinct fighting styles. one is our usual fighting style for logic and to figure out what works really well. the other is more realistic when we do self-defense simulations that we attack like an assailant on the street would. for the senior gradings (Blue belt and above) all students will be matched up with a senior student that is physically bigger than they are and have to survive and we see what their reaction would be.

some of the females who have gone through it used to go to my sensei and say "he hit me in my private area and i don't like it" and now then they realized that they were stuck in their preconceptions that attackers won't attack their breasts and they changed and learned from it.

But we don't do this with juniors as there aren't enough junior black belts to do it, and that they aren't old enough to know how to do those self defense situations just yet. But many of the juniors started to train from when they were 6 years old they will grow up being comfortable being hit all over.

[guird]

When you say 'chest' did you mean mostly solar plexus/stomach etc. with some accidental shots to her breasts or were you actually aiming pectorally as a target. I generally don't aim for the pectoral muscles against a male target, and though probably effective against a woman, it's bad etiquette towards your sparring partner in the same way as a kick to the groin is.

If it was the latter, then I do see where she's coming from, it would have seemed like you were aiming specifically for 'private places'.

[Nidan Melbourne]

I spar with girls in my karate classes all the time. one or two of them always make a fuss when punched in their breasts. but when they arc up about it, my sensei always tells them that they should expect it. Especially in a real self defence situation the attacker will want to go for any part of their body.

The rest of the girls in my classes are cool with being hit anywhere on their body.

Its like when a female kicks us in the gonads. and we arc up I wonder what your instructor would have said.