Accepting back past students to the dojo?

[Shotokan-kez]

I will try and cut this story as short as possible . I have always trained in shotokan. A year ago i decided to go back to karate and bring my son along, the nearest club was shukokai. We trained there for a short while but i wasnt doing so well as i had a high rank in shotokan and in shukokai i had to start from scratch and wasn't reaching my full potential. I decided that i would get in touch with my previous sensei and he allowed me back on the grade i left on a few years previous, and also accepted my son on his yellow belt he earned in shukokai on the condition he didnt grade for a while until he got up to shotokan standards.

The thing is i have settled very well in my old shotokan club and im now 1st kyu, but Ryan has been having difficulties adapting. He had made loads of friends in the shukokai club and seemed to be much happier. Unfortunatly the shotokan club is small and there is no-one there he can talk to. I know training isnt a social thing but he is only 9 and he was having real difficulties going from shukokai to shotokan.

So i called the sensei and asked if Ryan could go back training at his club, and he point blankly refused! Personaly i think this is wrong. He is just a child and judging him for leaving in the first place is wrong (as it was me who changed it..not him!). The sensei said that because he had left before there is a chance he will again. But surely kids do this? If you teach kids on a daily basis like this then you should understand a little that kids don't always put 100% into it.

I dunno and i'm not even sure im wording it right. I'm just annoyed at this sensei for refusing him, simply because he had been at the club before. What does everyone else think, particulary it would be interesting to hear what other sensei's feel about this.

Cheers

[New Beginner]

Hi Kez, I hope you're getting used to that 1st kyu by now!

Ultimately it's the sensei's decision who he or she admits for whatever reason, I suspect that he is fully aware that you took your son back to your old club with you and is perhaps 'making you pay' for your 'mistake', which seems very petty to me. In Kyokushin people come and go all the time, because it has a tremendously high drop-out rate, unless someone has been expelled from the dojo for misconduct which is almost unheard of, they are always welcome back, my dojo has its share of floaters and it's never been an issue. It's a shame for your son but if the sensei is minded this way he may be better off looking for somewhere entirely new as he's not enjoying himself at your dojo. If this sensei refuses to take students because he thinks they 'might leave' then he may as well close up, because all students leave in the end!

[Brandon Fisher]

Thats was very petty of that Sensei, personally I would not want my child in a dojo like that. Been there done that.

[bushido_man96]

Well, I think you have good reason to be annoyed. As an instructor, I would always welcome back a student who left on good terms. I don't understand this instructor's reasoning. Sometimes it is difficult to motivate children, but good instructors can get through this.

Hopefully he can adapt to the new classes you are taking, and will begin to have fun with it. Best of luck to the both of you.

[Shotokan-kez]

Yeah i thought it was just me so i'm glad you agree with me. I thought he may have been better in the saturday classes which is specially for kids but he see's his dad on a saturday and his dad won't take him.

hehe new beginner. I will get used to being 1st kyu, i aint even got my new belt yet, hopefully sensei will have them at training on monday.

[alsey]

that's just ridiculous. are there any other dojos around with kids classes or something?

[Shotokan-kez]

that's just ridiculous. are there any other dojos around with kids classes or something?

Which part Alsey? If you mean his dad not taking him then yes it is..he is! I guess i could find somewhere for him just that it would be nice for him to stay with the same sensei, also i like that fact that we train under the same sensei and in the same style.

[alsey]

sorry, i meant its ridiculous that the shukokai sensei wouldn't let him back. training without lots of other kids can have advantages as well, mainly less distraction from training, but you have to decide what's best, i don't really know anything about kids

[Fairfax_Uechi]

Yeah i thought it was just me so i'm glad you agree with me. I thought he may have been better in the saturday classes which is specially for kids but he see's his dad on a saturday and his dad won't take him.

hehe new beginner. I will get used to being 1st kyu, i aint even got my new belt yet, hopefully sensei will have them at training on monday.

Well I'm sorry to hear about your situation. But as others have said, if the Sensei won't take him back you're probably better off. I can understand that it causes him administrative work, but you can never have enough good will when you're in business. Something this guy must not understand.

Anyway, congrats on 1 kyu, and good luck finding a dojo for your son. As you figured out, you and your son are different people and your needs can be different, hence the need for different dojos and/or styles. I'm glad you're not forcing anything on him, and hope that you used this as a lesson to teach him that some things are beyond his and your control (the instructors decision). While painful, it's a great chance for him to learn about how life works, and that things aren't always right.

[MisterRadley]

Your former Sensei is being petty, and you're better off not training in his dojo.