Inner circle in the dojo

[c-prime]

Has anyone ever experienced joining a new club and noticing a "inner circle" of people within the dojo? What I mean by this is basically a group within the group that really doesn't associate with other people, especially newer members. I have, and I have just tried to do my own thing and not worry about them. But my only complaint is that I feel that it becomes a sort of intimidation factor for those new to the martial arts and when you don't feel like you are welcome, you usually don't go back. So, has anyone else experienced this? What did or would you do?

[longarm25]

typical human behavior

[shotochem]

We have a core group of people who are quite close knit. They are friendly and warm to all. It's just that we have all seen so many people come and go that it takes a while before a newer person feels a part of this group. When you train with dedicated people for years they tend to stick together more closely than those who have not been together as long. I would not take it personally. If you train hard and take it seriously

 

they will warm up a bit more.

[dear john]

you are new. most new people are going to be looked at as an outsider. you should remember though, eventuallyu you will no longer be new. after a while they might warm up to you. but if they dont and you are always stuck on the outside, i wouldnt stop going just because of that.

 

look at the system. is it any good? are the teachers good teachers?

 

 

 

what type of style is this dojo about?

[c-prime]

well it isn't exactly me im referring to, ive been there for over a year..im just talking about what I have seen lately thats all.

[Shorin Ryuu]

It's usually my experience that the people that have been there are probably closer due to shared experiences. However (in the places I have been, however), that does not mean in anyway that they are "cold" or treat anyone as an outsider. If anything, the effort to reach out to the newer members is large indeed. In martial arts training, you are sharing something very special with eachother, and that promotes a closeness. But this closeness isn't something to be hoarded, it is enhanced by having more people involved. Sure there is a worry that the beginner might leave, but it certainly won't be because you didn't try hard enough to keep them as part of "the family".

 

Bottom line: No, not in my experience.

[Shane]

I've seen this in some places, but the situation seems to vary from place to place. I've seen it where it is not a good thing and they are closed minded about outsiders, and then I've seen it to where it is a tight click and basically like a team environment but these types of groups are more welcoming to new students.

[italian_guy]

I agree with Shane, it changes from place to place and depends on several situations like for example age....

 

I have two completely different situations in the schools where I go.

 

In my TCC class the atmosphere is very friendly and I took very little to socialize, however in that school people have ages starting from 26 to say 55 and I'm 43 so no big problems here.

 

In my karate class instead I'm the oldest by far, I think that few people reach 30 and there are guys around 15-16, except the instructors that are slightly younger then me (around 39). There I socialized only with the instructors and another women student because we prepared the yellow belt test togheter. All the other seems to mix quite well but for my age maybe they see me as a strange object, sometimes when we do execises in pairs I hardly find somebody that wants to do the execise with me but I do not care too much because the style is great and (at least) the instructors are friendly.

[foreveryoung001]

I have to agree with Shane as well, that it varies from school to school. I have noticed though, that the "outsider" feeling has been a little more intense for me with the "McDojo" type clubs that I've had the pleasure of working out with. My theory, with absolutely no proof to back me up, is that with the quick testing, and lack of true Mastery in their art, the students at the "McDojo" have not learned humility to the same degree as some of the other, I'll say More rounded schools that I've visited.

 

It may just be me, but I find it very hard to associate with braggarts, and I find them to be a little more prevalent within the schools that most would label as "McDojo". Just a thought.