Help!

[Cactus_Gazz]

I got a person in my group of friends who never leaves me alone, espacialy about my weight. i'm 16 years old 167

 

cm tall and i weigh 91 kilo's, i'm tryed diets heaps of them, i'm tryed gyms too, nothing sems to work., but anyway my main concern is putting a stop to this kid, and i feel the only way is to smack him one. But i recon if i do it wont hurt him and he'll beat me (this kids not big and strong its a confidents thing with me) my dad always tell me i hit hard, i always seem to hurt him when we spar ( he was a boxer when he was my age) i've been doing karate for 7 months and i feel that my punches are extremly weak, anything i can do to improve these problems?

[monkeygirl]

I have to question your reasons for training, or for wanting to increase the power of your punches. Just because someone makes fun of you, doesn't mean you can beat them up. If this person were actually physically hurting you, that would be a different story. But as it is now, you need to be the better person and walk away. If anything, that is perhaps the best lesson martial arts can ever teach you...how does that saying go? "The true master never fights" or something like that.

 

Besides, what kind of friend makes fun of you like that? My friends and I nag each other all the time, but it's never serious or cruel. The next time he makes fun of you, you may want to tell him how much you dislike his "kidding". Do it in front of your other friends...if they're true friends, they'll support you when they realize how much he's hurting your feelings.

 

In any case, I don't think that violence is the answer.

[battousai16]

i like the avatar, monkeygirl

 

anywho, yeah, i wouldn't reccomend beating the tar out of the guy everytime he makes fun of you. my friends and i make fun of each other all the time. however, when one of us takes it to far (as we often do, being young and spry as we are ) we usually lightly tap the offender on the nose. they get startled and confused, but never hurt. worth a shot, anyway

[kchenault]

Give him a verbal warning. If he persists, pop him one. He will then know you mean business. People who don't have weight problems can't understand the emotional turmoil you go through. If words will not persuade him to lay off your weight, to me that justifies a physical warning.

 

If you do this though, you must be willing to commit if he retaliates. Put him in his place. My son, who is 8, has a weight problem. He weighs 118 lbs. He is tall for his age and when he gets older, we believe he will be close to 6'4". He has asthma and takes a steroidal inhaler for maintanence of his ailment. I feel this contributes to his overwieght condition. Not all but enough to make it difficult for him. People tease him as well and it takes its toll on him emotionally. I fear for the kid that finally makes him snap when I am not there to help him control his temper or intervene for him. My point is, people are idiots and do things that hurt others. Just look at the playground sometime. Talking doesn't always cut it.

 

The true master never fights because he already gave his licks to people on the road to mastery. Example....Hee Il Cho.

[Cactus_Gazz]

I think i may have worded my origanal post wrong. i wasnt looking "beat him up" i just felt that a little smack would make him realize i'm not to mess with, and he's not a friend he's friends with my other friends and he hangs around in the same group that i do. i dont want to nor will i ever beat someone up without being hit first

[Martial_Artist]

Knock some sense into the punk. I have always advocated that people need to learn the boundaries of acceptable behaviour. The parents of this kid have obviously failed in rearing a healthy component of society. Somewhere he must learn that such behavior is not to be tolerated and that consequences follow such behavior. It is this very p*ssyfooting around certain problems of our society that have let those problems grow exponentially.

 

As a young man, every bully got what was his. Did it change him? Did it make them a better person? I don't think in any one single case that happened. Instead, it showed them that they will not always be the bully and it is best to use discretion in their useless acts.

 

Tell him to stop. Give him the verbal warning. If he persists, SMACK HIM UPSIDE THE HEAD. IF he wants to continue stand firm and let him know that you will not tolerate being verbally abused. Because that is what it is: verbal abuse.

 

You sound young, this doesn't sound serious, but it does require, no it demands action.

 

Violence is not an answer it is a tool. And in this sense it is not mere violence it is a tool of discipline and justice. What a perfect world it would be if everyone just treated others like they want to be treated! Sadly, that world is not this world. Violence, in the sense of the word, is unwanton, senseless, but defense. Defense is justifiable, necessary, and righteous. THERE IS NOT A SINGLE PERSON WITHIN EARSHOT THAT NEEDS TO HUMBLY BOW THEIR HEADS AND TAKE A VERBAL TONGUE LASHING. Every single person deserves better than that. All men created equal. All men treated equal. If this guy doesn't stop when you ask him sternly, then WHACK him when he does it again. You don't have to kill the guy, just hit hard enough to let him know that you mean business and that you don't appreciate being degraded like that.

 

I would hope that every single martial artist recognizes the need to defend the weak. We do not live in such a pessimistic world so that the needs of our neighbors are irrelevant or useless.

 

I would also hope that every single martial artist who sees someone being picked on, abused, beaten, etc., has the sense within them to do something about it. Rather than "tuck tail" and "not get involved."

 

You may think that when evil comes knocking at your door that your fellowman will come to save you. Reality says otherwise. Why? Because good men do nothing.

[kchenault]

Amen brother! Love that line of thinking.

[Reklats]

Knock some sense into the punk.

 

Damn straight.

[Breakdancer]

yeah but dont do it in school...

 

you'll get busted