Eric_

Then you don't practice enough. Techniques serve a dual purpose: to exercise basic concepts in different applications, and to provide a quick response to an attack. The technique should allow for variables in the attack, such as the angle from which the attack originates, the size of the attacker, and your body position at the time of the attack. If you cannot perform a self-defense technique with these variations, then either it is a poor technique, or you have serious problems with your basics. Also, techniques should not be thought through while being performed, they should be practiced until they are a reaction. If you're going over a technique mentally step-by-step while a punch is coming at you, it is due to insufficient practice, so grab a partner, and get some more repetitions in.

My art of choice is Chinese Kenpo. It is very self-defense oriented, the techniques are practical and effective, and our system is open and continually changing as our environment and new ideas dictate. But, mostly it was more the school that decided me, rather than strictly the style. Our instructor insists on training that is extremely practical, and our organization (IKCA) really takes the subjectivity out of learning and testing processes.

Personally, i don't believe that breaking should be included in ANY test, child or adult. It is just too irrelevant to skill in a martial art. I do, however, see it as a good training too, when used conservatively. In adults, it helps condition striking surfaces. I agree that children should break rebreakable boards only, as these offer the most consistand resistance and breaking pattern. It's incredible how encouraging such simple, but very visible, accomplishments such as breaking the next strongest board in the set can be, especialy to children. It's a sense of progress that will keep a young child focused and motivated. It also helps illustrate (notice, i said illustrate not develope) the effects of confidence and a determined mindset. I can not tell you of the number of people I have seen (and not only children) who were convinced they could not break a specific strength rebreakable, but with encouragement, not only break that one, but the next three or four as well. So while I agree that it should not be required, and that children should not be alowed to break a board with a punch or chop, I don't feel that breaking should be entirely avoided.

Competiton-style sparring is really a lot different from a "street" fight. In competition, you are both in stances, often waiting for the other person to strike, you are limited on your targets, you can't hit hard enough to stun your opponent, which means that you need to be looking for counter strikes, and, most importantly, your average Joe Drunk isn't going to be a stylized fighter. How you fight, and, subsequently, where you look, will be much different. Generally, though, while sparring i try not to look at anything, but to just point my eyes toward their center of mass and let my peripherial vision do most of the seeing. Remember, though, sparring is mostly for building reflexes, targeting, etc., and for fun. Don't try to relate any more than the general mechanics of it to a real-life fight.

There should be no problem with that at all. My instructor's wife, for example, is a green belt in our system, and when she is in his school i never even hear her call him by his first name. But the problem of training exclusively w/ your girlfriend is really no different than it would be if it was just a good buddy. I have that very problem, in fact. When a particular friend is in class (incidentally a female, but we aren't dating) we are almost always partners for drills, which I really need to fix. I once dated a fellow martial arts student, though, and because the thought of distraction was conciously on my mind, I never had that problem with her. On the plus side, it's great to have someone that you talk to often outside the dojo to get your butt in gear by saying "We're testing on Tuesday. Be ready. Practice!"

Hehe, yeah, i occasionally tell a friend of mine to punch me so i can practice blocking strikes that i know won't be pulled . . . he usually quits after 2 or 3 . But what you're talking about is reflexively blocking a mock punch. DON"T try to get rid of that! a good martial artist shouldn't have to think about blocking a punch – that's what the countless repetitions are for. just this morning a guy at work yelled behand me to try to startle me. it worked. instead of the typical jumping into the air, i snaped into a fighting stance, leading w/ my hand (which happened to be holding an aerosol can) as i turned . . . lol, he's lucky he didn't get clocked w/ the can! Anyway, my point is that that sort of reaction is exactly what you're working to achieve, so your friends will either get used to the bruises, or quit messing around like that!

Why did he tell you to shut the hell up? Did you somehow intentionally piss him off? If not, then what you did was right, just poorly executed. remember, FIGHTING HURTS, better get used to it now while your biggest problem is still "bullies." Also, have confidence in your abilities. Now, you are still a yellow belt (if your display is current and correct . . . by the way, if anyone could tell me how to change that, i was by much obliged!), so maybe you DON'T have the skill to win a fight with someone that much larger than you. That's okay. Evaluate youself objectively, and be realistic about what you think you are capable of. Maybe now is still the time to avoid violence as best as possible. Even if you can beat him, don't think about what you will do to him when you se him next, think about what you could have done. If a fight is truly the best solution to a problem, then fight with total commitment, but NEVER seek an opportunity for one, especially after the conflict has passed.

Paying monthly, particularly by EFT, can be a great convinience. no papers, no forgotten payments. I pay monthly at my school, and have never had a problem. Of course, i know my instructor to be an honest and reasonable person, so just make sure you aren't dealing with anyone "shady." it's testing fees that i have a problem with . . . but i'll complain about that on another thread!

i think that it was a very effective method of changing an agressor's attitude. there are few targets on the human body that elicit such massive mental reactions. if a vicious-looking dog comes bounding toward you, how do you react? by bending over to protect your testicles, regardless of the fact that it puts your hands, face, and throat in the dog's reach. a tap to the groin was probably his sureest method of preventing a physical fight. as for the church, does it have any doctors as members have any those doctors ever given a prostate exam? i assume that the church would have no problem with that, so they just need to get the sticks out of their butts (pun intended).

yeah, that way she wouldn't get bored with me talking about martial arts constantly, or try to get me to skip class to spend time with her (i need my karate fix, dang it! )

where to begin . . . bathroom, highschool classrooms, various convinience stores, kitchen, and, of course, my girlfriends bedroom . . .