i dont really have this problem- the girls in my class are in university, and one is in jr high, but they are all very disciplined etc- save one, who is in high school and very giggly. i just try not to get partnered up with ms giggly and it makes it better. as for sparring... i tend to be really aggressive, but when i fight the girls i tone it down, but i really prefer fighting the guys. i havent had a problem yet about them not hitting hard because im a girl- i just hit them hard, and they hit back. just stick at what youre doing, or maybe talk to your sifu if it really becomes a problem