shortyafter

Thank you sensei8. I also appreciate your thoughtful and encouraging feedback.

Quick one tonight. I was quite happy with tonight's training. Relaxed body, relaxed mind. I think not thinking too much about it is good.

Missed Wednesday night's training because I came down with a cold that ended up being bad enough to where I figured the healthy decision was to stay home. Just got back home from Friday night's training. When I came in my instructor informed me that we had a new adult student start on Wednesday - a blue belt that had been out of action for awhile. In my humble little dojo I have been training exclusively with teens except for my instructor of course. It's crazy but one of my first reactions was some sort of jealousy, like, oh this guy is gonna be competition for me and for my instructor's time. Quickly I realized, that's foolish, but it kinda stayed with me. Until the moment the instructor was using me as an example, and I decided it was up to me to do my best tonight. Why? Not to prove to this guy or to anyone how tough I am or how good at karate I am... but rather because this guy is new, and if he sees good karate being performed, he is more likely to stick around. And if he's more likely to stick around, the dojo grows. So I did my best tonight, but not for any kind of glory to my name, but rather for the good of the dojo. Selfishly I will reap the rewards of a stronger dojo and a new training partner, but, it's a selfless sort of selfishness. I felt good having this realization. There was a moment where I was working with this new student and had a bit of trouble with a new self-defense technique. My instructor corrected me and I almost slipped into some kind of mentality like "agh man I can't do this"/"woe is me" kind of thing. Seriously. But I literally realized - you choose to slip into that. And you can choose not to. So I didn't, and listened to my instructor's corrections and successfully performed the technique. That also felt good. We did some intense stretching in class the other day that I posted about here. I realized that if I want better flexibility and higher kicks, I have to take up my stretching a notch. Well I've been doing that for about a week and I'm already noticing a difference. Instructor also told new student that about a year ago my flexibility was nowhere near where it was now. That also felt good. Finally, we did some jyu kumite. This new adult student is a big guy (he's hoping to lose weight by training), older than me, and a working class guy. I'm bookish and quite thin in comparison. Well, he was hitting me harder than the teens (nothing crazy), and honestly I felt good about the way I was getting in and out in our little bout. Felt like if this sort of situation happened IRL I would have a chance at defending myself against a bigger, slower guy. Thanks to my karate. Anyway folks, have to run but it was a good night all around.

Sensei8, thanks as always for your feedback and encouragement. I feel spiritually and mentally I am much further along than I am physically. I feel an inner strength, but I can't always make that translate into proper technique or physical power. But, from my understanding I think I have my priorities straight. Was it Funakoshi who said spirit before technique? As you said, I am doing my best to respect the process. Thank you.

Hey there, thanks for the wonderful post! After my great weekend of "karate revelations" I kind of went into the dojo last night with expectations. Needless to say, I sort of let myself down. But, I realized, that's not really an indication of me doing poorly - it's more an indication of me being in a hurry to "arrive". We did some intense stretching, too, and I realized besides performance I also have a long way to go in terms of flexibility. But then I also saw that, I have already come so far. Perhaps the journey is always like that, no? So much gained, but with so much left to attain. You're right, I want to enjoy every step of this journey. Your words were exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks.

Met a new young couple today while I was visiting my friend (who is basically like a mother to me, in my new home overseas). She was telling them that I do karate, and the guy asked me what belt I had. I said "green" and he said "Oh, green", as in like, he was expecting black or something and that green isn't really that advanced. He said he briefly did karate, but stopped, and has a friend who is a 3rd dan. Honestly didn't take that negatively, because that's not what it's about for me. He also said, "do you do kumite? You gotta do kumite!" The woman who is like a mother to me stepped in and said, "yeah but that's not why he does it. Explain to him why you do it." And, I hadn't necessarily thought about it before, but at the prompting of this woman, I kind of knew intuitively what I wanted to say. "I do it because it helps me to have a clear mind, and a relaxed body". And like, that was a really cool answer. I guess somewhere deep down I knew that, that's why it came out - it was just kind of the first time I had expressed it verbally. I liked that answer, and I like that my karate is going in that direction. Thanks folks.

Sometimes I wonder, like, am I really getting anything out of my karate? I've only done one (30-second) full contact fight, and actually that went very well for me. Besides that, I've seen my kata improve, I've gotten more flexible, spiritually I'm much more up to challenges. All that for sure. But like, does the fact that my kata have gotten better really mean anything for me physically speaking? This is gonna be funny, but, I was just walking my girlfriend to her car and we were playing a little impromptu game that I will call "try to slap my butt". Beyond being hilarious I also noticed that, wow, I'm really good at avoiding her slaps, and at finding an opening to slap hers. This may sound crazy but it was all related to my karate. I could feel it. And all it was was me being in the moment enjoying myself. When I'm able to use my body in new, more agile ways like that without even thinking about it, that to me means some kind of serious change has gone on at a deep level. I also know that this kind of thing would also be useful in a self-defense situation. But besides that, I have to say, what happened tonight for me is what karate is all about.

Did some kata in class and then some application which involved some hand grabs (I'm not sure the name of that to be honest), like when the opponent grabs your wrist and you grab his hand and twist it to remove it/immobilize him. Nothing difficult at all but I was happy that I was able to watch my instructor closely and execute all of the applications correctly. It may seem small but IMO being able to follow directions and replicate simple maneuvers is actually a big thing (I've been in the position of messing these things up many a time). Did some kata on my own after class and was also happy with the way they looked. Much more snappy. One thing I was missing however was a certain sense of precision - at times my snappiness was too forced and I kind of (or completely) lost my balance. But the underlying principle felt good. Happy with tonight.

My experience and knowledge would agree that training in Kyokushin is generally more intense, but that really depends on the dojo and instructor. Also depends on which day you train within the very same set of dojos. Also depends on how you define intense. In any case, I'm not sure how that really changes the issue. Regardless of the intensity level they are still very much the same art, especially in the eyes of a layman. As I said before, I am a beginner in both but what I have learned in each style is absolutely valuable when it comes to training in the other. I'm sure as you train up the differences may be more pronounced, but on a fundamental level they are very much the same art which is karate. Not nowadays in the age of the internet, and 30-50 years since karate has become an art that is known and practiced worldwide. But here we're talking about a video produced in the 1950's for a largely ignorant American audience... I have to agree that you seem to dislike Shotokan, or else I can't really see the need to make this argument. As others have said, to me it's all karate.

Bahrain, I won't claim to be on expert in any style, I've only been training karate/martial arts in general for 4 years. I must say though, what I learned in my first dojo (Kyokushin) gave me a great idea of what to expect in my second one (Shotokan), even though there were obviously some adaptations I had to make. If I had walked into my second dojo without ever having trained Kyokushin, I would have been much more lost and really wouldn't have an idea of what to expect beyond what I had seen in films/media. I also did a 9-month stint of Japanese Jiu-Jitsu, after having already trained a bit in Kyokushin, and it was different enough that I was really missing my "karate". I couldn't find a Kyokushin Dojo in my new hometown, so I went to Shotokan, and my craving for my karate roots was more than satisfied there. As you really dig into the styles I could see there being much greater differences, of course. But like I said, it's just an analogy - feel free to play around with it. If dialects of the same language is incorrect, you could think of it as Spanish vs. Portuguese. Both different languages, although also quite mutually intelligible. So both would fall under the broader category of "Romance Languages" or "Iberian Romance Languages". Draw the lines wherever you please...

Had my second training since the events I described above (with my school in Spain, NOT the people I had this problem with). Like I said, I'm kind of confused, because my teacher here is tough, too. And that's normal, right? This is karate, this is a martial art. I wouldn't want a teacher that was some kind of big ol' teddy bear that had no semblance of strength to him. Which makes me think, maybe I'm exaggerating about the other people? It's honestly a tough line to draw, but all I know to do is trust my gut. And I was very happy with training tonight - a consistent pattern I've had with this teacher (coupled, of course, with progress in my karate). With the other teacher there was progress, but a also a constant pattern of feeling crappy and walking on eggshells. So IMO it's clear. We did some kumite training tonight. I've had what someone called the "relaxation epiphany" before, but it's quite often difficult to actually apply it and be in that mindset. Well tonight I was in that relaxed space, and I was thinking about the idea of control. Being controlled and aware of my body at all times. That's the only effective way to actually deliver techniques. Not everything was smooth but overall I was happy with my performance tonight. I think control is key, and actually a part of relaxation. Both feed into the other.

I'm a foreign language teacher (and learner!) so I always like to make this comparison. Shotokan and Kyokushin (for example) are both branches within the larger art that is Karate. Just like American English and British English are both varieties within the larger language that is English. Despite the fact that you will find drastic differences between them in pronunciation and vocabulary, and there may even be some confusion between native speakers about certain slang, both are without a doubt completely mutually intelligible. Just like this video, it's perfectly acceptable to say "I speak English". If you want, you can specify which variety you speak, but there's no intrinsic need. (And within those two sub-groups you have all kinds of fun accents, like Southern English, Boston accent, Cockney, RP, etc.!) Now take the case of English and Spanish. The truth is you will find about 20-30% lexical (vocabulary) similarity between both languages. The grammar is even quite similar. The alphabet is obviously the same. That said, you clearly wouldn't say they are the same language. Just like you wouldn't say Kung Fu is Karate, even though they have many, many things in common. I remember watching a video of the Shaolin monks and thinking - "this reminds me of karate!" There's a reason for that. Then you have fun cases like Portuguese and Spanish, for example, that are two different languages but quite similar. Maybe the Kung Fu / Karate metaphor would be more appropriate here? And English / Spanish could be something like Judo and Karate. Who knows. You can play around with it, but I think you get the point. At what point does a variety of a style become it's own style? There's no definite answer, but, I think when you see it, you know.

Hey JR, thanks for your response. It could be true that he was preparing for black belt and needed extra training to get there, etc. I'm not totally sure because I was overseas when most of this went down. That would have been more reasonable, yeah. But the ultimatum still doesn't make sense. It would be one thing to say - "come to extra trainings, or I can't give you a black belt". That would make more sense in my mind. But "come to extra trainings or you can't train at all?" It's like holding somebody hostage. I also think student in question was quite dedicated, but maybe not ready to take the leap that Sensei wanted him to (which is his right, no?) Also, no, I wasn't exceptionally close with said student. We got along very well, and he's my friend on Facebook but beyond training we didn't really have any contact. But I did find it odd when he suddenly dropped off the dojo map. I didn't ask him anything at the time - it was only when I started getting a weird vibe that I decided to investigate a bit. I'm sure there is some good intention in the instructor's mind, and I did learn a lot of good lessons about strength and perseverance from him. I think he really thinks he's on to something, and if you just listen to him, he can push you to a new level. But as a teacher myself I know you can't force a student to do something he's unwilling to do... A shove, a push in the right direction, tough love - yeah. But at the end of the day I think this CI is too forceful, too controlling. And you're absolutely right. I do feel like I'm walking on eggshells with these people, and I do deserve better than that - thanks for saying that.

Hey MatsuShinshii, thanks for your reply. Let me see if I can give you more detail, from what I know about the situation. I don't think it has anything to do with money, from my experience, plus because the student said he offered to finish paying his yearly contract but the teacher cancelled it because "they don't need money from someone with such a negative view of the organization". It sounds really strange (which is why my mind is sort of blown), but I think it's more of an ego trip and above all a control thing. Me and this student started on the same day, and he advanced to brown belt quickly - I thought he was a very good karate student, and my impression was that he was actually one of the CI's favorites. I'm pretty sure he was training at least 2 nights a week (which is the specified minimum for advancement). Beyond that, at this school they started doing 4-6 hour trainings on weekends as an extra option for those who were very dedicated - but that was obviously supposed to be extra. Mind you the student in question is a father of 3 with a full time job... Again it sounds strange but it keeps coming back to some weird control thing. Hate to say it but the word "cult" even seems somewhat appropriate. As for the Japan trip. I started thinking about and to be honest it's totally possible that they didn't even want me going, hence their reluctance to get back to me. Why wouldn't they want me going? Well, because I'm not really part of their inner circle and have showed reluctance in the past to get too close to them. Or maybe they're just inconsiderate like I originally thought. Maybe a bit of both. And yes, I agree, and I tried getting them as direct as possible - getting the wife (head of business affairs) face-to-face, trying to reach CI on the phone - but from day 1 they've shown great reluctance to fill me in. And I thought about trying to get in touch with the both of them one more time, which would be the normal route in these kinds of situations. Problem is, this behavior seems indicative of a larger pattern, a pattern that is negative and that I honestly want no part of. And that view was confirmed by the ex-student we talked about above. Appreciate you getting back to me and curious to hear if you have more thoughts. Like I said this is all very strange for me and it's left me feeling a bit confused. But happy that I trusted my gut and made a positive decision for me.

TL;DR (Too long, didn't read) at the bottom. So earlier I posted about "more big news" coming soon. Then I posted I had successfully executed a yoko-geri, which wasn't what I meant by that, but was a good surprise none the less. Anyway, the big news was that my karate school was organizing a trip for a kata tournament in Japan in late April of this year. I was feeling good about my karate, and life in general, and figured - this is once in a lifetime, let's do it. Quick note - the school in question here is the school I started out at. After about 3 months with them I stopped training there because I moved to Spain, but I would still train with them when I went home, about 1 month a year. Here's the story: I tried to get in touch with my CI, who would be organizing the trip, before I would be returning to Spain. I didn't get him face to face because he wasn't there my last night training before flying out, so I talked to his wife (who handles business affairs and also trains), and she was really not a lot of help at all. So I tried calling my CI, twice, and he sent me to voicemail. Finally got a response via Facebook messenger that answered a couple of my doubts, but totally left me hanging on a couple of big questions (namely: which city is this tournament even in? I have found no info online...) I think maybe I sent him like less than 3 paragraphs of text? So it's not like I was blowing him up or anything, and it was certainly an important affair. Anyway, I figured I sort things out with my boss, which I did, and he gave me a green light yesterday. So I sent a message to the CI's wife, and she saw it but did not respond. It was only 2 simple questions, one of which, again, was which city is this tournament in? No reply. Someone told me "maybe they're not detail-oriented" but to be honest that's not it. I'm getting resistance on their end for some other reason, which is strange for me. I thought about it and thought, maybe they don't like the fact that I'm kind of independent and do my own thing (I only train with them 1 month out of the year). With this CI it tends to be his way, or the high way. I guess I kind of forgot about that until I started trying to get more involved with them. So I decided to message a friend of mine who I noticed stopped training there about a year ago. I asked him why he stopped training, and oh boy did he tell me. Basically they gave him an ultimatum - do extra trainings on the weekend, or be expelled from the dojo. He wanted to take a few days to think about it, but they gave him another ultimatum - decide now, or be expelled. So he took the ultimatum and stopped training with them. Honestly seems like crappy conduct to me, and it bears a clear resemblance to the way they've been treating me with this Japan trip. But there's more. We are both of the opinion that some of what goes on there isn't just "tough", but also at times humiliating and borderline abusive (or straight up abusive). Nothing where like, cops need to be called, but enough to the point that I don't want to get too close to those people... and definitely enough to not want to spend big money to take a trip with them. Again, I sort of got this vibe from them before, and myself have walked out of there mildly injured as an 8th kyu. So I made a point NOT to get too close, but I did go back because "tough" karate does have it's benefits, right? Well, now it seems those pros have been outweighed by the cons, especially in regards to this trip. Part of the reason I'm doing karate is because I'm learning how to stand up for myself - to say no to things that aren't good for me, and to say yes to things that are. It looks like now I'm going to have to say "no" to this trip, and this school, because of the bad vibes I'm getting from them... There's an older gentleman who started the same week as me, who is now a brown belt there. Physically, he seems more apt. But emotionally and such, he still seems kind of beat down. Like a victim of sorts. In fact a lot of the people there kind of seem that way. And that's kind of the guy I was, but don't want to be anymore. Maybe these people are more physically apt, but, for me karate is deeper than that. To be honest this has screwed with my head, because now I'm second guessing everything. They say everyone has their side to the story, and the truth is somewhere in the middle. So maybe thinking these people are an evil, abusive cult is somewhat of an exaggeration. I'm sure they have good intentions and obviously the CI is quite an apt karateka. However, I must be honest with the fact that I get a sour vibe from them... At the end of the day it's not about who's wrong or who's right, who's bad or who's good - it's about what works for me. And the way these people do things doesn't work for me. Luckily I have a great teacher here in Spain. I saw tonight that he too can be a bit harsh with his tongue, but it's not anything like this guy back home... And like I said, everybody's got their flaws. It's just about choosing who I want to be with, who I want to train with - what works for me, basically. And at the end of the day if I'm doing best by me I'll have more to give back to the people in my life. I really like the Funakoshi quote, "Karate is in everything. That's the beauty of it." And this has been an important part of my karate journey. Having the courage to trust my gut and shake off something that doesn't suit me. Still a bit shaken up, like I said, but I feel good about my decision and my direction. Let me know what you all think. Thanks for listening folks. TL;DR - Ugly realizations about the karate school I train at 1 month out of the year, and one that I was planning on taking a trip to Japan with. I'm sure their intentions are good, and the truth is somewhere in the middle, but these don't seem to be the class of people I really want to be associating with. Especially not when it comes to dropping a lot of money to spend time with them.

Thank you bushidho_man96 and sensei8. It's crazy to think this is actually happening, but it is! It was definitely an "a-ha!" moment and it's good to hear from others that my MA journey is being properly nourished. Also great to have this community here to be able to share, get feedback, and get support. I really appreciate it guys. Thanks.

Big night tonight. I posted previously that I was feeling really good about my karate - only one problem, my yoko-geri looks really ugly, and I'm not executing properly. I'm sure you can all relate, but in the back of my mind there was a voice whispering to me (sometimes yelling) that "I can't do this". For me, as a chubby kid who got picked last for dodgeball growing up, sometimes I get the feeling that my body isn't as good or functional as other people's. This is actually one of the #1 reasons I'm doing karate. There it was again rearing it's ugly head, and, no matter what your circumstances - as martial artists (and human beings) I'm sure we can all relate to that idea of "I can't do this". One of the biggest concrete things I've overcome (actually outside of karate, but hey, it's all karate, right?) is learning how to roll my R's. I'm an American living in Spain, so Spanish language is very important to me. I was convinced "I couldn't do it" but through persistence and lots of practice and searching, I finally got it. Now I can roll like a champ. But it was very similar to what I described above - I felt my body / tongue couldn't physically do it. I was wrong. So today my karate instructor was explaining the yoko-geri again, and he mentioned something that just totally "clicked" with me. You know that feeling? he said, try launching it from "behind" - in kosa-dachi. Sometime from all my efforts I knew that was important for me. So I tried that, and after class I showed my teacher - "is this it?" And he said. "Yep, that's it!" I did it! I can do it. Now it's a question of being able to launch from other positions that aren't necessarily kosa-dachi, but the idea is the same. I feel the mechanism and I know what my body needs to do and where it needs to go to execute this kick. And I showed myself now that I can do it. A big victory for me. Thanks folks.

Indeed! Thanks for the comment, sensei8. Pleasure hearing from you. More big updates coming soon...

Hi folks. First of all, I read your comments about taking notes / not taking notes / only writing important things down and going back to them, and I appreciate all of those tips. Thank you. It's been awhile, but my karate journey has been going pleasantly (although not without bumps). I live overseas about 10-11 months out of the year and spend the rest of the time at home with my family in the USA. This gives me a unique opportunity to train in two styles without "cheating" on my dojo (lol!) In the USA I train Kyokushin, and in Spain, I train Shotokan. I examined for my green belt a couple of weeks ago in Shotokan - I passed, and I felt really good about it, and my instructor seemed to feel really good about it. All of my techniques look and feel much better, and I really appreciate a certain gracefulness I'm learning from Shotokan that I did not develop in Kyokushin. I'm more comfortable with my body and I'm more relaxed in training. My kata look and feel much better than they ever have. The only stumbling block is my yoko-geri. I'm still not executing it properly or in a pretty way, but I am stretching every day and hoping to develop the flexibility and knowledge to execute properly with the help of my instructor. The yoko-geri is ugly, but everything else has improved by leaps and bounds. I suppose perfection is not to be expected - otherwise we'd have nothing to work on. The best lessons I learned from Kyokushin are strong spirit, persistence, and intensity. These are elements that are not present at my Shotokan school, or at least not strictly enforced by my instructor. It's kind of up to me to hold myself accountable, and I'd say, most of the time I do. I guess sometimes it's nice though, to be able to grow at my own pace without a drill instructor type of situation to worry about. It's all OK as long as I'm able to be honest with myself. As I began to dedicate myself to my Shotokan school, I remember posting here asking if this style of karate was "real" karate, or if I was doing some sort of McDojo thing. You all assured me that as long as I felt challenged, and that my training helps me to meet the larger challenges of life, it's valid. And both of those criteria are met by my school. So I went for it with a new drive and clear conscious in me. As I said before, a couple of weeks ago I received my green belt. Fast forward to last night, and I was back training at my Kyokushin school since I'm home a couple of weeks for the holidays. I am a blue belt (which is the equivalent of an orange belt in Shotokan, Judo, etc.), and I was in a small class that included my Sensei and 2 Senpais. We were working on advanced kata, and also training kata with the bo staff. I was able to follow along very easily, and the emphasis my Shotokan instructor had placed on stances was invaluable. My Sensei noted as such - "Your Shotokan training has done you well. You're a quick learner." This is high praise from this man, who I respect very much and will not hesitate to call you out if you're not performing to the dojo's standard. I think the gracefulness I learned in Shotokan was also becoming evident. Tonight I trained again and had some personal issues jumping around in my head, that kind of blocked me up in our kata training. It did not go as well as last night but I fought through it and did what I could, and by the end of training we did a bit of kumite technique training. I have not been doing much of this at all at my Shotokan school but I was pleasantly surprised to see that my kicks looked and felt ever so slightly better. I think it's about being more comfortable with my body in general, and also that gracefulness I keep mentioning. It really works. I must say, I see the beauty of a kata, and how learning it correctly and mastering it can spill over into all areas of my karate. We don't do much sparring at my Shotokan school, and of course no full contact, so I think power might be one area where I'm lacking when it comes to applying my karate to a real-life self-defense scenario. But I think that too will come with time, especially if I stay close to my Kyokushin school whenever possible. And, in the end, as we all know, karate is not about fighting anyway. I will continue to train as if that were the case, but I know that the real valor is in learning how to avoid the fight all together. I recently saw this quote from Sensei Funakoshi, which I believe is drawn from his 20 precepts. It is the following: "Apply the way of Karate to all things. Therein lies its beauty." I'm beginning to see the meaning of this more and more in my everyday life, and it's a feeling I do enjoy. Thanks folks.

Hey folks, Thanks for all the great feedback. I have absorbed it all and have started taking it into account. Special thanks to Tempest for starting it off and giving me the major pointers. Unfortunately I pulled my lower back at the gym yesterday, nothing serious, I'm already at about 60-70% a day later, but bag training hasn't really been my priority. Anyway. I did give it a go the other day, doing what you all said, especially taking it slow and easy and focusing on one thing at a time. It didn't look great or especially flashy, but it FELT good. It felt like the right path, it felt like something I could build upon. I remember I started running again a few months back - my "go get em tiger" "strong spirit" personality told me to push it super hard. Needless to say I was completely wiped out in 5 minutes. Lol. Started taking it little by little and nice and easy and now several months later I amaze myself at my speed and endurance. No different with the bag right? Thanks again for the great tips.

Hey there folks, Was just doing a tad bit of bag training after class finished and had some things come up that I thought I could bring here. My karate journey has been going on for about 3 years (with some periods off time off, but lately very consistently) and in that time I haven't done much bag training. When I hit the bag I feel weak and clumsy, and it's almost like I'm forcing a lot of unnecessary effort or something. It's funny because when I do partner work or a kick mitt or even one of the full-contact fights I've done, I feel much stronger. It's almost like I'm scared of the bag because it doesn't quite give like a human body. So I tense up and try too hard, as if the objective were to split a hole in the bag or something like that. Another thing - I usually get bloodied up in between my knuckles when I train on the bag. My Shotokan instructor tells me to target only with my knuckles when I punch. My Kyokushin instructor has said nothing on the topic. But I think this is another reason I'm scared of the bag - I don't want to get scratched up hands. Put simply - I'm kind of scared of the bag and don't know how to approach it correctly. Any tips?

I know it can be tough when you hear the negative all the time. But its perhaps your instructor's way of telling you to never settle, to never be satisfied, to always strive for even just a little bit of improvement. The key for an instructor, in my opinion, is the delivery, though. I think its important that the students here the positive along with the negative, but some instructors don't do it that way. Its just the way some are. Its important to just keep driving yourself from within. Keep your head up. Some time when you are at a tournament or some other event performing, you'll probably hear some compliments from some other instructor, someone who doesn't see you everyday. That'll feel really good. Hey there, that's a great point. Since I posted that I've been feeling a lot better and I've been getting some positive feedback from my CI. He's kind of a stern guy so it's not in his nature to be handing out compliments. Which can be bad on the one hand but on the other when he gives you one, you know he means it. I live overseas but when I visit my dojo back home it's nice because my CI gets a fresh look at me, and the phenomenon you're talking about here sometimes happens. Good point, thanks! Hey there sensei8! It's good to hear that some people do, and some people don't. I suppose in my case I'm still figuring out what works for me. That's what being a beginner is all about, right? Still a lot of uncertainties (and it may be that way forever!), but I at least have some things clear - patience, persistence, and strong spirit. Lately I haven't been taking notes but who knows. Thanks for this!

Been awhile folks but time for an update. My progress has been spotty, some days I see it some days I don't (that's quite normal, right?). This week has been a tough week for me for outside reasons and today I was feeling especially crummy when I hit the dojo. Then my CI announces we are going to do a mock exam for our belt exams that we have next month. We were going to start with my exam, which is for green belt. My first reaction was, "ah man, not today!". But I quickly caught that and said - "Take this as an opportunity. Overcome this." I don't know where that voice came from, but it worked. The only feedback I got from my CI was that he was "content" but I knew I had done pretty damn good. Definitely some spotty parts but my spirit and attitude were strong (stronger than they've been in awhile) and it showed in my technique. I'm happy. Thank you singularity for your encouragement. You are absolutely right. And thank you MatsuShinshii for your words as well - I will keep that in mind when watching videos.

“There is no first strike in karate” doesn’t literally mean “you should never throw the first punch” (or kick). It means don’t start the fight. If you’re certain there’s no way out of an imminent physical altercation, a pre-emotive strike is quite often the best defense. So long as you’re certain there’s no other resolution. For example... I was walking to my car late one night after work when I worked in the Bronx. A few feet away, a guy walking towards me asked if I had a light. Once I responded I don’t smoke, it became clear that what he was pulling out of his waistband was a gun. As he was pulling it out, I punched him as fast and as hard as I could in the jaw, dropping him to the ground. I soccer-kicked him a few times while he was on the ground to ensure he wouldn’t get up, then I ran faster than I ever ran in my life (and hopefully will ever have to run again). Did I violate Funakoshi’s precept? Nope. And if I did, it’s a pretty stupid precept. Side note: After I settled down and thought about what happened, I thought I did the stupidest thing I could’ve done. I thought I should’ve stopped and did want he wanted. My boss at the time put it all into perspective: I didn’t know what he actually wanted, although it was probably money, and how do I know he wouldn’t have shot me after he got whatever it was that he was after? How do I know he didn’t just want to shoot me for no reason? I’m alive and unharmed, so it wasn’t the stupidest decision. It would’ve been the stupidest decision if I knew for certain he was only after the $8 in my wallet and I got shot over it. That's an interesting situation. I agree that you did right. I think you would have violated true karate spirit if what you did to that guy was overkill or intentionally left him more screwed up than he had to be. Yeah, you got the soccer kicks in to make sure he was down. That was a good idea. And hell if in your attempt to make sure he was sufficiently incapacitated you broke an arm or something, that's OK too. As long as you weren't looking to intentionally break an arm or kill the man, what you did was OK. The dude probably walked away with a bruised face and and maybe a missing tooth. And hey I'm not here to judge but he wasn't exactly a saint or anything. Cool story (although I know it wasn't at the time!), thanks for sharing.

Hey guys. Part of this journal was to kind of, keep track of important insights and revelations and such. Well to be honest, I'm not really sure if that's the right path for me. Do I really need to write down every little thing my instructor said in class? Probably not. In fact, fretting over little details might actually be counter-productive. Fellow poster JazzKicker mentioned that above. So I don't know. I've kind of put this on the backburner as well as my personal journal. I got really disappointed like 1-2 weeks ago because I thought my yoko-geri was looking good but my instructor told me it needs a lot, a lot of work. What!?!?? I thought I had improved so much. Really disheartening. I thought, perhaps it was a quick fix, and after working on it a bit he says my kekome looks OK. But the keyagi still needs a lot of work. Still kind of disheartening. Especially since I thought most of my progress had come in my legs. Now I'm wondering if I've improved at all in the last few months. All I can think to do is keep showing up, keep listening to my instructor and keep looking at videos and other resources. Keep training. I'm far from happy with my technique, but, I know that after these 2 years and change I feel much stronger mentally, physically, and spiritually. That's gotta count for something. The technique will come. I know it will.