Budderfly Posted June 11, 2003 Share Posted June 11, 2003 The following transcript helps to paint a better picture of what a McDojo is; ******************************* A big sign greets the customers. It says "McDojo’s Over 99 Million Promotions Served!" Instructor: Welcome to McDojo’s! How may I promote you today? Customer: I would like a Black Belt, please. Super sized if possible… I've had a few too many hamburgers lately. Instructor: Would you like a stripe with that? Customer: Hmmm…sure…why not. I haven’t had one in a long time. Instructor: What about a title? Customer: Do you have any Grand Masters? Instructor: Why yes…hundreds in fact. That's our most popular title! Customer: Excellent. I will take one of those. How long will it take? Intructor: Well, it used to take a lifetime to prepare one of these, and only the most devoted could afford the sacrifice. But now we have them pre-packaged in almost every style. A few old holdouts wouldn’t give us their style's recipe. But we have some guys working on that right now. Customer: Well those three in the poster look good. I’ll take those, and don't skimp on the patches! I love pretty patches. Instructor: Ok sir…Coming right up. 5 minutes and 20 customers later... Instructor: Here you go sir. Customer: Umm…I think there is a mistake. I paid for a red stripe. That’s a white one. Instructor: The board of directors decided that the traditional red stripes reminds them too much of blood. They don’t want to project a bad image. Customer: But red is the color you have used since you opened so many years ago! Everyone I knew grew up on red stripes! It’s traditional to have them with the Grand Master Combo. Instructor: There’s nothing I can do sir…Oh sir, you owe us an extra fee for the stripe upgrade to white. Customer: Okay that’s it. Let me speak to whoever runs this place. Great Great Grand Master Pan Zie: I am the one you seek. What do you wish to know? Customer: Why can’t I get a red strip with my black belt? Great Great Grandmaster Pan Zie: Red was no longer cost effective for our traditional training paradigm. Customer: So you're saying red costs too much to make? Great Great Grandmaster Pan Zie: Your insights do you well, young Grasshopper. But you would do well to keep these secrets…secret. Customer: But you charge more for the white even though it costs less to make! Great Great Grandmaster Pan Zie: I am sorry…there are many more contracts and promotions I have to dispense. Customer: That’s it! I've had enough of you guys. I am going to take my business to Burger Kwon! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tibby Posted June 11, 2003 Share Posted June 11, 2003 I think the 2 best ways to find out: 1. Ask him for a list of requirements for black belts. Some schools just require you to know a few moves, other require things like board breaking, times mile runs, and things of that nature on top of that. I know a school that require 20 hour survive training! Your drops off in a National Fortess with no shoes and no tools for about 20 hours! You know they are not handing out black belts! 2. Ask them what Ryu/Kwan they are a part of. Most of the posers will not even know what you are talking about. Butterfly- you forgot to add the complementary Asian mysticism to hide that fact that you don’t know JACK! lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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