delta1 Posted March 30, 2003 Share Posted March 30, 2003 Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering who to invade next when his telephone rang. "Hallo, Mr. Hussein!", a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!" "Well, Paddy," Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?" "Right now," said Paddy, after a moment's calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Sean, my next door neighbor Seamus, and the entire dart team from the pub. That makes eight!" Saddam paused. "I must tell you Paddy, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command." "Begorra!" said Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!" Sure enough, the next day, Paddy called again. "Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!" "And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Saddam asked. Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm tractor." Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to 1-1/2 million since we last spoke." "Saints preserve us!" said Paddy. "I'll have to get back to you." Sure enough, Paddy rang again the next day. "Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified Harrigan's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four boys from the Shamrock Pub have joined us as well!" Saddam was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 1,000 bombers and 2,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!" "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!", said Paddy, "I'll have to ring you back." Sure enough, Paddy called again the next day. "Top o' the mornin', Mr. Hussein! I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war." "I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?" "Well," said Paddy, "we've all had a long chat over a bunch of pints, and decided there's no way we can feed two million prisoners." God Bless the Irish!! Freedom isn't free! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kiddo Posted March 30, 2003 Share Posted March 30, 2003 Lol. A few Irish inventions. (No offense Irish people. Just picture it as blonde instead) A helicopter ejection seat and a Solar powered light Black belt- Shotokan Everybodies going Kung-fu fighting. LMAO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ninjanurse Posted March 30, 2003 Share Posted March 30, 2003 The Iraqi national bird..... Duck! "A Black Belt is only the beginning."Heidi-A student of the artsTae Kwon Do,Shotokan,Ju Jitsu,Modern Arnishttp://the100info.tumblr.com/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red J Posted March 30, 2003 Share Posted March 30, 2003 Anyone ever hear about the submarine with the screen doors? I had to lose my mind to come to my senses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superleeds Posted March 31, 2003 Share Posted March 31, 2003 Or the new swedish lightweight swizz-cheese boats? Read a book! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeygirl Posted March 31, 2003 Share Posted March 31, 2003 I'm straining VERY HARD not to say anything about the ducks.... 1st dan & Asst. Instructor TKD 2000-2003No matter the tune...if you can rock it, rock it hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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