Quitting at Black Belt

[sensei8]

I just can’t reiterate it enough that we owe our students our complete respect, whatever their decision is, no matter how much we might be disappointed.

You know, this might seem an unfavorable thing to say but you know what?? MA is just a thing…a want…not a need, like shelter or food. Our MA journey can’t be our students journey or even similar.

Does a CI want what’s best for their students or what’s best for the CI?? 

[bushido_man96]

12 hours ago, sensei8 said:

I just can’t reiterate it enough that we owe our students our complete respect, whatever their decision is, no matter how much we might be disappointed.

You know, this might seem an unfavorable thing to say but you know what?? MA is just a thing…a want…not a need, like shelter or food. Our MA journey can’t be our students journey or even similar.

Does a CI want what’s best for their students or what’s best for the CI?? 

I'm not trying to force students to change their minds.  But I think we do ourselves and our school a disservice by not prepping students early on for the idea of being a post-1st dan student.  If a student tells me they want to quit, I'm not going to beg them not to.  But I am willing to ask "why?" and have a discussion to figure out what I could have done differently to perhaps retain the student longer.

[Spartacus Maximus]

It is natural to feel great disappointment when one has spent the time, energy and dedication teaching someone a skill; seeing potential in them only for them to quit at the very time when their efforts begin to show results. 

[sensei8]

22 minutes ago, Spartacus Maximus said:

It is natural to feel great disappointment when one has spent the time, energy and dedication teaching someone a skill; seeing potential in them only for them to quit at the very time when their efforts begin to show results. 

That’s what’s great about a door. It opens to let people in and let people out. Meaning?? When one student exits out the door, a prospective student comes in the door.

Please don’t misunderstand my coldness, but I can’t be affected either war because if I’m affected by whether a student stays or quits, then I’m not giving my all to the students who’ve chosen to remain on the floor.

[Spartacus Maximus]

Perhaps the disappointment might be less important when there are less students. The matter of fact is that it is a normal thing to occur, even just for a fleeting moment.

It does no good  to dwell on it, especially when students and prospective students are abundant. That could hardly be considered coldness.

It’s just how teaching works and, a wise instructor knows from the beginning that most students will probably quit well before the 4-5 years(average) required to even get to shodan(or equivalent). Never mind beyond that.

[KarateKen]

When it's time to go it is time to go. 

[crash]

Hi guys, been a while....... i think for most getting their blackbelt is a sign of completion in this type of activity. it dousnt become a lifestyle so much for most, especially if the dojo is focused on mainly self defense or competition. for fitness purposes a gym is in most ways better and less expensive. it also depends on the style and the atmosphere of the dojo in question. is it run as a business (do students feel only like a number on the floor?) or does it have that "family" feel to it?. retention of students can be hard after B.B, people go on to other things or ways of staying in shape. teaching or bringing up 2nd or 3rd or higher levels is OK but in all honesty its just a way for the dojo to make money on testing. once someone reaches blackbelt they should know how to create their own forms, have the basics perfected and be able to perform more advanced techniques or movements on their own with a little thought...(if they cant then perhaps they were given the BB too soon. sometimes a diagrammed "plan" or curriculum isnt the best way to go... or at least it needs to be fluid)  after blackbelt one thing that may retain students is pricing, be competitive with the local gyms, even it if means 25 dollars a month (if the biggest competition is workout anytime, planet fitness or such), for those who've earned their B.B... but building a comradery and friendships is key to retention, go out to dinner, (pizza huts used to be perfect for this...lol), the movies, have a bar b q once a month in the warm months, whatever it takes to build a "family" unit of friendships......

Edited Friday at 02:24 PM by crash

[pandaGIRL]

I am nowhere even close to a black belt, ...if I do get to that point I'd like to stick around and help other students, but we'll see.

 

[crash]

6 hours ago, pandaGIRL said:

I am nowhere even close to a black belt, ...if I do get to that point I'd like to stick around and help other students, but we'll see.

 

you will get there. dedication is all it takes and it soon becomes a lifestyle. of course life changes and interests come and go but this is one that can and will follow you throughout, even when those times of other endeavors come along this is something you can always fall back into. ive been in this since 1980, moved from coast to coast. tried different styles and dojos along the way. built memories ill never forget and friendships and acquaintances that will always bring a smile to me. as the years pass you will learn more that it is as much  about growth and life in general as it is about sport, or self defense. a continuing journey of realization and learning..... good luck on your journey. and may you too one day be passing on what you have learned along your path.

Edited Sunday at 10:22 PM by crash