Kirves Posted January 25, 2003 Posted January 25, 2003 He'll wake up and smell the coffee when you go to a real dojo for six months and then kick his sweet aft.
KickChick Posted January 25, 2003 Posted January 25, 2003 Hey girl ... I've been "listening" ... I am just surprised first of all that your relationship has survived training in the same dojo ... perhaps you are not willing to give the relationship a chance for it to survive training in different dojos. IMO if it is "strong" enough .... it is strong enough period! But as you said.... you probably should have had a "talk" with the instructor. Communication is the key in getting what you want ... then you open the door to the possibilities! Hey crosstraining may be the answer in meeting your BF halfway ... if it works for you then fine. But I "heard" the happiness in your posts when you found that new school. Be honest with yourself and have no regrets ... both in and out of the dojo!
Kensai Posted January 25, 2003 Posted January 25, 2003 Umm.........funnily enough nope, none of us has. Whats Brazilian Jiu jitsu. We have never ever heard of it before. (sarcasm) karatekid1975 asked about her dojang and boyfriend issue, this is no place to be plugging BJJ........ OH PLEASE!
karatekid1975 Posted January 25, 2003 Author Posted January 25, 2003 Ok, all. Don't turn this into an arguement. Yes, I have heard of BJJ, but I never done it, so I can't say anything about it. I was asking for advice about dojangs and how it would affect my relationship, not styles. Please try to keep on the subject. Anyways, thanks Kickchick I knew you would have good advice. Yes, we do have a strong relationship. That's why I decided to cross-train and still train with him. Maybe I am a sucker for love hehehehehehe. But I believe it will work I also "voiced my opinions" to my instructor (about the self defense, ect). Suprisingly, he totally understood. I was shocked. They are changing stuff in the dojang, so I will give them another chance. I'll keep you posted Laurie F
karatekid1975 Posted January 26, 2003 Author Posted January 26, 2003 Mr. Clark, That was un-called for. I, for one, got him into the traditional arts. I have no desire to change my style, or my boyfriend. For another thing, we do not accept your type of attitude on this board. We do not allow "flame-wars" or "style bashing." You are entitled to your opinion, but you were out of line. If you wish to start a "flame-war," there are the rec.martial arts boards. Enjoy Laurie F
Karateka_latino Posted January 26, 2003 Posted January 26, 2003 Oh geezz, don't ever get a girl in-love upset!!! Specially if she knows martial arts Good you talked with your instructor.... not to be a jerk.. but what did you expect?? Duh, obviously he's going to say anything to keep his students, I don't think he'll like to lose two more students, you say already he have lost some students. Since you decided to stay, i advice you to give a couple of months, not more than 3 to start to see the changes..if its all the same, then get the heck out of there. Honestly. You seem to be really happy with the other Dojang, its a shame you don't go there to train. Well, you are doing it for your boyfriend, but lets be realistic.. what happends if he gets tired of martial arts??.. then you will end wasting valuable time in a dojang you didnt like it. Love is beautifull, yes. But Don't make important decisions in life just out of love... I just hope you are happy with whatever decision you take, but be carefull on not making a decision you may regret later. I wish you the best
karatekid1975 Posted January 26, 2003 Author Posted January 26, 2003 Sub, thanks man I know, and agree with you, but I'm willing give it a try for him Laurie F
karatekid1975 Posted March 4, 2003 Author Posted March 4, 2003 I wanted to bring this back up again. I re-read Sub's last post. Dude, you were so right. I did stay at the McDojang. I'm still not happy. Judo has been fun, though. 3 classes isn't much (Judo is only once a week), but I learned more there than I have in TKD as far as self defense related stuff. I was driving passed the good dojang I found and my heart just sank I wish I did go. I'm stuck in a "rut" again. I was thinking about quiting TKD all together. Just do Judo for now. I know I thought about that because I am frustrated. I feel like I'm "stuck" there (the Mcdojang). Laurie F
larryjf Posted March 4, 2003 Posted March 4, 2003 There is more to life than the martial arts and your relationship with him should me more important. Also, the greatest act of love is self-sacrifice. I think one can learn more from practicing love than all of the martial arts combined.
ninjanurse Posted March 4, 2003 Posted March 4, 2003 I think you have gotten a lot of good advice here , but everyone seems to be focusing on this McDojo idea and that paying money for something you don't like is stupid. While I basically agree with that (think alot of schools are in it for the money), consider this...YOU LOVE MARTIAL ARTS and it seems to me you are in a position to get the best of two worlds. First, train with your partner and enjoy growing in the martial arts together-maybe someday you can open your own school and run it the way you want (like Mr. Lafler... ); second learn the other art and grow in that to supplement YOUR own "style". Take the good things about each one and discard the bad. You will find things that you don't like about any dojo that you train in... it all comes down to what you want out of it. I guess you could say I trained in a McDojo but I never saw it that way at all, I wanted the training and I definetly got what I paid for because I WANTED it. Not all students in "mcDojo's" have this want-they are in it for other reasons. As far as changes in your dojo go, why not become part of those changes (I plan to try my hardest to ) and offer up your own ideas...your instructor should be open to you expressing yourself and welcome new ideas...and may even appreciate the help. I know that some of the changes he is thinking about will be a good thing-he seems passionate about TKD, but remember his interest is Olympic style and I see that reflected somewhat in the school now (durring my visit with him he talked alot about it). Now I am not trying to speak for him but I think he realizes that not all students want to go down that road and he wants to change to offer other things...and to make more rounded students (that is just my first impression...time will tell if this is a correct assessment ). Ultimately it is about what YOU want and given your dedication to both martial arts and your man, I think you have made the right decision for what you want now....however, as hard as change may be there is always room for it and you may want it someday. I hope this makes sense and I didn't ramble too much... "A Black Belt is only the beginning."Heidi-A student of the artsTae Kwon Do,Shotokan,Ju Jitsu,Modern Arnishttp://the100info.tumblr.com/
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