Conflict-Struggle-Arguments

[Alan Armstrong]

We have all had them, one time or another, conflicts, struggling and arguments.

It seems how we deal with these moment "sensibly" can be more important than the issue itself.

With very trivial things, one does need to ask oneself the question, do you want to win or be happy?

Ceasing to struggle and to accept those things you cannot change is another option.

While in other cases the option to, agree to disagree, is always available.

Stop Calm-down Talk Compromise, is very useful in most instances.

When tempers boil over, it really is a time to listen more than to talk, as in these times, both sides stop listening.

Don't compete for promotion or higher belt ranking, enjoy while you can where you are, struggling and causing internal conflicts, isn't going to make you or anyone else happy.

Look at it this way for a moment-

As students are like plants and the CI is like a gardener, when a plant is too big to grow in a pot the gardener transplants in into a bigger pot, giving it more room to grow; happy plant happy gardener.

The plant gets a bigger pot and the student gets a promotion, pushing the issue as a student, will only cause a conflict, struggle or arguments with the CI.

A small happy wise plant however, is constantly making its roots stronger by soaking up the moisture from the soil, preparing for the next promotional bigger pot and also soaking up the sunshine, till the next move arrives.

If the plant happens to be a tree, well that plant is going to bust out of the pot if given enough time.

As the plant knows, only the strong survive, survival of the fitist or forest, in either case, it might not be you.

Therefore the time of internal conflicts, struggles and arguments, can be put to better use on becoming a more improved you instead.

How are you dealing with conflicts, struggle and arguments, inside and outside of the dojo?