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got jokes???


taezee

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:spitlaugh: some good jokes there gold!! :smile:

when you do your best it`s going to show.

"If you watch the pros, You will learn something new"

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:spitlaugh: some good jokes there gold!! :smile:

 

sorry my couputer was going slow and it posted again!!

 

[ This Message was edited by: kicker on 2001-10-16 17:04 ]

when you do your best it`s going to show.

"If you watch the pros, You will learn something new"

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hey KickChick where do you get all of those emails from??

when you do your best it`s going to show.

"If you watch the pros, You will learn something new"

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President Bush gave his prime-time news conference last Thursday night and a reporter asked what "regular people" could do to fight terrorism.

 

Bush got some unintentional laughs by saying, "If you see someone you don't know taking off in a crop duster that you don't own, contact the authorities."

 

After the cameras went off, Bush gave some more items to the press that got nixed in the papers the next day:

 

If you see someone making a bean burrito and you ordered a chili cheese burrito, contact the FBI.

 

If you see someone taking a 15 minute smoke break when they're only allowed 10 minutes, contact the CIA.

 

If you see someone making faces when they were ugly enough to begin with, contact local law enforcement.

 

If you see a Gilligan's Island rerun when you expected an episode of Seinfeld, *immediately* contact Kramer.

 

If you see someone dressed as a Klingon and there's no Star Trek convention in town, contact William Shatner.

 

And, if you see someone trying to give you one of those free 1000 hours with AOL CDs, coordinate a tactical nuclear strike with your local nuclear weapons representative.

 

 

Kung Fu Black Belt 1st Dan

GoldDragon Academy

-------------------------

Represenitive for Paltalk.com

*-*-*-*-Mouser (Palhelp)*-*-*-*-*-

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what kind of cereal does mike tyson eat????

 

eerios :lol: (evander holyfield responds) huh?

 

whad he say?..huh? :lol:

 

 

Javier l Rosario

instructor taekwondo/hapkido

under master Atef s Himaya

"whenever youre lazy enough not to train .someone, somewhere is training very hard to kick your *"

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lol taezee!!

 

i joke!! how much did you get air yesterday??

 

oh i got and 10 meters of air!!

 

:lol: get it!! :lol:

when you do your best it`s going to show.

"If you watch the pros, You will learn something new"

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This quiz consists of four questions that tell you whether or not you are qualified to be a professional. SCROLL DOWN FOR THE ANSWERS. There is no need to cheat. The questions are not that difficult. You just need to think like a professional.

 

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

 

...

 

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door.

 

This question tests whether or not you are doing simple things in a complicated way.

 

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

 

...

 

Incorrect answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the door.

 

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator remove the giraffe and put in the elephant and close the door. This question tests your foresight.

 

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

 

...

 

Correct answer: The elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator! This tests if you are capable of comprehensive thinking.

 

OK, if you did not have the last three questions correctly, this one may be your last chance to test your qualifications to be a professional.

 

4. There is a river filled with crocodiles. How do you cross it?

 

...

 

Correct answer: Simply swim through it. All the crocodiles are attending the animal meeting! This question tests your reasoning ability.

 

So......

 

If you answered four out of four questions correctly, you are a true professional. Wealth and success await you.

 

If you answered three out of four, you have some catching up to do but there's hope for you.

 

If you answered two out of four, consider a career as a hamburger flipper in a fast food joint.

 

If you answered one out of four, try selling some of your organs. It's the only way you will ever make any money.

 

If you answered none correctly, consider a career that does not require any higher mental functions at all, such as law or politics.

 

 

Kung Fu Black Belt 1st Dan

GoldDragon Academy

-------------------------

Represenitive for Paltalk.com

*-*-*-*-Mouser (Palhelp)*-*-*-*-*-

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