muttley Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Hi and welcome!I can't give you any advice on dojo's in your area I am afraid as I am UK based. HOWEVER I can understand exactly how you feel and what you are going through.I have recently returned to training (pretty much for the exact reasons you state) after a good 15-20 year hiatus. I had trained in Shotokan when I trained before and was eager to return to this style due to the level I got to, however on looking for a good Dojo in my area, I found that I just couldn't find a Dojo that I wanted to train at. There were too many "young black belts" which the CI's seemed to use and abuse, they were using 15 year olds as uke's and as co-instructors with no qualifications. This disturbed me, a lot! I too was annoyed with the high proportion of kids turning up in their gi's already, again, I used to change at the Dojo.There was too much messing about in lesson time, kids were not respecting the Sensei which to me was just unheard of.Anyway, after taking more time to find a Dojo, I literally stumbled upon one that was local to me, different style (Kyokushin) but had everything. As a new Dojo, it is small with often only myself and the Sensei there (there are other students). I love my new Dojo, it is a fantastic place for me to go and get lost in Karate for a few hours a week which is really helping me to unwind from my rather stressful work life.There are childrens sessions, yes they are more relaxed than the adult sessions, but they still are very much based upon "tradition", students bow when entering and exiting the Dojo, all students partake in reflection for a few moments at the end of the lesson and bow to the Sensei etc.In my new Dojo, I am seeing a lot of what I saw in my old Dojo's and it is fantastic.My advice, take your time, visit many Dojo's train in them for a couple of lessons, speak to the CI and see how you feel. But the most important thing is something that you have already done, you have made that decision to get back into Karate/Martial Arts and trust me, the feeling when you step foot back into a Dojo for the first time is just fantastic, memories will come flooding back and, if you are like me, all of a sudden everything just feels right again.Sorry for a long reply, I just started and couldn't stop.You could be my UK twin, except that I didn't study Shotokan my first time around. Way too many dojos here that I pass on my way to mine for many reasons. The similarities between my old system and current one got me to visit my current dojo. What was going on in there made me stay.I don't know if it's just me getting old (I'm 39), if I got lucky my first time around, or if the state of MA in general is taking a turn for the worse in regards to what is expected from students from a respect/protocol/tradition standpoint. Most schools out there are very, very different than I remember them being 20 years ago. Kids (and adults) have much less respect nowadays than when I was growing up; society seems to have changed, perhaps therefore reflected in dojos. Then again, my parents and grandparents said this when I was growing up too. Growing up, I guess.I like to think of choosing a dojo like choosing a pair of shoes - no matter how "good" or pretty they are, if they don't fit right, none of that is relevant. Find a dojo that fits you.Solid post! I think it could be a case of being a mixture us growing up (I too am 39 until March!) and the fact that society has indeed changed vastly since the time people from our era were in their formative/teenage years.Trust me, I have seen it all in my work. As a prison officer in a juvenile facility, I saw the very worst of how teenage boys can be, now in my new role in the judicial system, I see not only the teenagers, but also the younger ones who behave with no respect. It's as if (and in the prison, the lads used to state this quite frequently) the kids want us to respect them for being a teenage kid. It's like, because they got into a local gang, they deserve respect, well my answer to that was always that respect is earned and they had not earned my respect yet. Unfortunately now, I also see the parents of these kids and some times it is easy to understand.It is a shame that society is like this now, and I can only hope that people realise that change is needed. It is not only an issue in the UK, I am obviously aware that in the US in particular things are worse (aren't we about 10-20 years behind the US in society model or something?)Anyway, to the original poster, stick with it and keep going until you find that dojo that just fit's and feels right, trust me, it is out there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JR 137 Posted September 10, 2015 Share Posted September 10, 2015 Mutley - the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. As a teacher, I see it all the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muttley Posted September 10, 2015 Share Posted September 10, 2015 Mutley - the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. As a teacher, I see it all the time.My wife is a teacher, when I was working with the juveniles, our stories were VERY similar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bball197046 Posted November 30, 2016 Share Posted November 30, 2016 I would also prefer tradition. I also would prefer an all adult class. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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