Instructor kicked my son as punishment - now what?

[KARATEKA911]

that's discipline , yeah of course as parents we don't like it , but that's something we all have to deal with especially in the M.A. ( your gonna get hit in way or another ) its part of the learning experience.

[bushido_man96]

that's discipline , yeah of course as parents we don't like it , but that's something we all have to deal with especially in the M.A. ( your gonna get hit in way or another ) its part of the learning experience.

That doesn't sound like discipline to me. It sounds to me like this instructor abused his authority. Accidents will happen in the dojo from time to time. That's the nature of a contact sport/activity. But to tell a child to basically assume a position in order to inflict pain on him, is over the top.

[KARATEKA911]

isn't that the way it was done before ?

[Hawkmoon]

that's discipline , yeah of course as parents we don't like it , but that's something we all have to deal with especially in the M.A. ( your gonna get hit in way or another ) its part of the learning experience.

That doesn't sound like discipline to me. It sounds to me like this instructor abused his authority. Accidents will happen in the dojo from time to time. That's the nature of a contact sport/activity. But to tell a child to basically assume a position in order to inflict pain on him, is over the top.

I agree with you Bushido_man.

As the head or senior in the room 'they' needs to control the rest of the room and that is done with respect & presence, not violence.

That is not a discussion that is fact.

In another thread somewhere in this forum I made a comment about kids yours and theirs and how emotional things can get etc etc, any parent will go to length they thought they would never reach when kids are involved.

This does include over active imaginations as to what actually happened, or was done.

I can honestly say, hand on heart, I have watched and even had to restrain persons from going to far because a kid was involved in something and was pulled up on whatever it was.

This to my point of view includes playful 'kicks' to the backside with a comment 'get a move on'!, to full on shouting at them saying "are you stupid what were you thinking?"

To my favorite, the arm grab to pull one child off another....... and guess why that had to be done?

A certain 'red mist' clouds peoples minds and there view, is this incident truly about a kick done with full on malice, the point of it to hurt/cause injury?

Or

maybe a kick to 'shock' ?

or

simply a small child kicked by an adult witnessed as the kick ended?

edit:

((some not all) Spelling mistakes corrected)

Edited October 2, 2013 by Hawkmoon

[kensei]

that's discipline , yeah of course as parents we don't like it , but that's something we all have to deal with especially in the M.A. ( your gonna get hit in way or another ) its part of the learning experience.

I think that we can all agree that an adult standing infront of a child kicking them is grounds for possible criminal charges. In my Country if the police were called and they could prove that this occured...no matter what feble excuse is given...the adult would be in jail at the least!

Their is no excuse for "disipline" like this, it shows a great charactor flaw and if it was my daughter getting kicked, I would be "disiplining" the heck out of that guy!

You can not demand respect or instill disipline this way. You get fear and you create children that live in fear of you. If you can not teach children these two aspects of karate with out becoming a bully then you have no place in teaching Karate to children!

[bushido_man96]

isn't that the way it was done before ?

I've been at if for 20 years now, and have never been disciplined like that.

[ps1]

almost 30 years of training...I've been kicked, punched and struck various times during testing and such. However, it was never done with malice or under the guise of punishment.

I agree, this was abusive.

[Aodhan]

almost 30 years of training...I've been kicked, punched and struck various times during testing and such. However, it was never done with malice or under the guise of punishment.

I agree, this was abusive.

Same here. I've been in martial for 28 years and never been hit/kicked/physically abused as a punishment.

Now, I will admit to "tuning up" an attitude in sparring class on occasion, but never in a malicious manner, and certainly never done to humiliate/demean anyone.

John

[IcemanSK]

Let me first say that what happened to your son was absolutely abusive & quite wrong for this instructor to have done.

In my more than 30 years of training, I've only seen one slightly similar situation. My first master (in the early 80's) was Korean-born. I was a teen at the time. We had one Korean-born teen who's father made him train because he was very disrespectful to, well, everyone. Our master would punish him for his constant disrespect toward everyone in class by sparring with him after class very hard, neither wearing pads. The master would kick him out of class often; only to have his father come to the dojang & beg him to take his son back to class.

In hindsight, as an adult, I see how abusive this was (by both master & father). But in the Korean culture (& time period) respect for seniors is paramount and that type of "lesson" was common. My master treated we Americans very differently. He had different expectations for us. I'm not excusing what this behavior, just explaining the "way it was."

BTW, this type of discipline did not have the desired effect. The student eventually left our dojang never to train there again.

[Hawkmoon]

.....The instructor (a black belt) called my son to the front of the class, told him to stand with his arms in the air and then kicked him in the stomach. My son dropped to the ground and was gasping for air after getting the wind kicked out of him. The instructor then yelled at my son and told him to stand up. I wasn't there - but this was the story I got from both my son and another adult. I am bothered not only by an adult, black belt physically assaulting my child, but by the humiliation he also inflicted.

........

JASmama, speak with the other 'adult' confirm the given details, then be clear with your reasoning for seeking that confirmation state to the other adult your desire to report this and have action taken to address this.

Ensure they understand that they as the witness will need potentially stand up in whatever forum the action leads and follow this through to its logical conclusion.

No one here (as complete strangers, from different ethical and moral backgrounds) supports what was done we all condemn it.