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I know it is tough, but try not to think only about the gradings. Get to class, focus, and learn. Then, take something home from class to do as homework. Take your time. You will be surprised to see how many of those ahead of you are likely to fall away from training as time goes by. Then, what does it matter when they tested?

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CredoTe I really like your post! I definitely felt ashamed (of myself and of the verbal reaming I took), and ended up apologizing to the Sabumnim, and training as usual. I do often feel ashamed of having an ego that flares now and again. I also (stupidly, I know!) feel ashamed of always trying to be noble about this kind of stuff, i.e. after I apologised I felt like a gigantic pansy. I know I'm probably a bigger man than a 'cool guy' who would not have apologised, but...yeah.

I also should have taken the earlier bus for safekeeping, but that's two hours earlier.

Anyway, you're right!

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Cool guys apologise!

I'm not trying to give you a hard time or anything and I don't walk around acting like a doormat to people but I can still apologise when needed, in fact i apologised to a Brown belt on Tuesday after something I said before our grading on Sunday. Even as a new Nidan I still thought that I may have offended them so made a point of apologising. They said not to be stupid and it was fine, but i'm just trying to point out that it's natural to make mistakes and okay to admit it afterwards.

All part of becoming a better person which is normally a (good) side effect of MA training.

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Cool guys apologise!

I'm not trying to give you a hard time or anything and I don't walk around acting like a doormat to people but I can still apologise when needed, in fact i apologised to a Brown belt on Tuesday after something I said before our grading on Sunday. Even as a new Nidan I still thought that I may have offended them so made a point of apologising. They said not to be stupid and it was fine, but i'm just trying to point out that it's natural to make mistakes and okay to admit it afterwards.

All part of becoming a better person which is normally a (good) side effect of MA training.

Absolutely! :nod: There's a difference between being apologetic all the time (usually associated with self-esteem issues) and recognizing one's own faulty decision or action and apologizing for it (which is part of humbleness).

BTW, mal103:

They've done the long answers, mine is short and to the point:

Shut up and train!!!

...

You will only get out what you put in.

Sometimes short and to the point is best...lol And, "shut up and train" is great advice when one's mind gets all jumbled and distracted... Shut it up and train... :)

We sound like a broken record to our students with almost verbatim what you said: "you only get out what you put in." Rock solid! :karate:

Remember the Tii!


In Life and Death, there is no tap-out...

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You only get short answers when i'm supposed to be working....

:)

Hahahahaha..! Sneaky sneaky...

:rofl2:

Remember the Tii!


In Life and Death, there is no tap-out...

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Whenever I've had a student speak to me about rank in the manner of rank being NOW more important than anything within the MA, I've done the unheard of thing to that type of student...

If I test them, and they pass, they get NO certificate or new belt denoting new rank...they get nothing other than...Congratulations...now sit down!! I might or might not ever give it to them because they've demonstrated to me that the tangible is much more important than the intangibles within their MA journey.

"But that's not right/fair!!" How so? I allowed you to test, and I surely didn't have to, I passed your testing cycle; you earned that. I'm just not obligated to present you with the tangibles of a certificate and a new belt denoting new rank. Demonstrate to me that rank has a proper context within you, and I'll consider presenting to you the tangibles that you value, when and if you pass your next testing cycle. Until then, it would be easier for you to get those tangibles from a school of the MA that give them away like candy. Not me...not ever...not now!!

:)

**Proof is on the floor!!!

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Whenever I've had a student speak to me about rank in the manner of rank being NOW more important than anything within the MA, I've done the unheard of thing to that type of student...

If I test them, and they pass, they get NO certificate or new belt denoting new rank...they get nothing other than...Congratulations...now sit down!! I might or might not ever give it to them because they've demonstrated to me that the tangible is much more important than the intangibles within their MA journey.

"But that's not right/fair!!" How so? I allowed you to test, and I surely didn't have to, I passed your testing cycle; you earned that. I'm just not obligated to present you with the tangibles of a certificate and a new belt denoting new rank. Demonstrate to me that rank has a proper context within you, and I'll consider presenting to you the tangibles that you value, when and if you pass your next testing cycle. Until then, it would be easier for you to get those tangibles from a school of the MA that give them away like candy. Not me...not ever...not now!!

:)

That's pretty bold....and awesome :) :up: As a smaller dojo, we don't have the liberty to be that hard / bold... I wish we had the student body to be that way. We're as hard as we possibly can be without pushing students away....it's frustrating sometimes, but we'll get there someday.

Remember the Tii!


In Life and Death, there is no tap-out...

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I suppose those that keep asking for their next grade/rank shouldn't have it, just like those people who want to be politicians shouldn't be...

One of the books/stories i've read mentioned when being presented with a higher grade a MAist with real humility will just take a deeper bow, put the belt in a bag and go about their day as usual.

One of my students was told last week that they may have to wait to grade to Black belt as they have double graded and had an extra grade at our summer camp, within our association there is a minimum period of 3 years to Shodan.

They were absolutely fine with this news - as in their words they can still keep learning Karate and the next Kata etc.

I think after Shodan students need to break away from grade/rank/certs etc.

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