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Posted

My usual student's boyfriend is going to be visiting for a few weeks and being brought to class, so I was hoping to cover some self defense tips and suggestions for how to deal with situations where something happens while people are together and need to get both out.

First question might be, what are some situations where that actually happens? Second, what are some central points to pay attention to?

"Anything worth doing is worth doing badly." - Baleia

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Posted

There is nothing worse than getting into a self defense situation when you have your partner with you. Their instinct is to grab your arms and pull you away. This happened to a friend of mine, his girl friend grabbed his arms leaving him helpless in the face of the attack. I have warned my wife, if we are ever in danger of attack, "for God's sake stand back and give me some room."

Look to the far mountain and see all.

Posted

"There is nothing worse than getting into a self defense situation when you have your partner with you. Their instinct is to grab your arms and pull you away. This happened to a friend of mine, his girl friend grabbed his arms leaving him helpless in the face of the attack. I have warned my wife, if we are ever in danger of attack, "for God's sake stand back and give me some room."

WELL SAID - It also happened to a friend of mine - It's funny I said the same thing to my Wife.

Posted

The standard situational awareness, looking for exits and the like, would be the place to start. While boyfriend is distracting in a fence position, girlfriend should be looking for escape routs. From there on, positioning would be important. Boyfriend in front, fencing out, getting "big" to cover up the girlfriend. If backing away is necessary, it should be the girlfriend's job to guide the boyfriend in case there are some detritus that could be tripped over or anything like that. A light touch on the back, a quick word of warning, etc. (or roles can be switched, boyfriend doesn't have to be the hero...).

When it comes to techniques and tactics, I'll leave those to you. These are just some ideas that kind of popped into my head that might be useful. They might not, too. But maybe they'll give you a starting point. tallgeese might have some more to offer here.

As far as situations, I think an attempted mugging, bar scene with multiple people around, or even home invasion could all be passable scenarios.

Good luck, and let us know how it goes.

  • 1 year later...
Posted
"There is nothing worse than getting into a self defense situation when you have your partner with you. Their instinct is to grab your arms and pull you away. This happened to a friend of mine, his girl friend grabbed his arms leaving him helpless in the face of the attack. I have warned my wife, if we are ever in danger of attack, "for God's sake stand back and give me some room."

WELL SAID - It also happened to a friend of mine - It's funny I said the same thing to my Wife.

My wife already knows to stand back before the shooting starts.

Not ready for prime time signature removed.

Posted

I read this morning about a couple near where I live walking to their car. A guy approached them with a gun and forced them to an abandoned building and sexually assaulted the girl. The boyfriend wrestled the gun out of the attacker's hand and wound up killing the attacker. Sad situation, but it shows that it can happen anywhere, and you should be prepared everywhere you go.

Seek Perfection of Character

Be Faithful

Endeavor

Respect others

Refrain from violent behavior.

Posted
I read this morning about a couple near where I live walking to their car. A guy approached them with a gun and forced them to an abandoned building and sexually assaulted the girl. The boyfriend wrestled the gun out of the attacker's hand and wound up killing the attacker. Sad situation, but it shows that it can happen anywhere, and you should be prepared everywhere you go.

Sadly I can easily top that story. Don't read if you want to keep your faith in humanity.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2014/03/13/wisconsin-home-invaders-beat-blind-husband-raped-pregnant-wife-police-say/

Not ready for prime time signature removed.

Posted

I read that yesterday. And all I could think is that those people are a different kind of evil.

One can only hope that they one day experience the terror themselves that they put those people through.

Seek Perfection of Character

Be Faithful

Endeavor

Respect others

Refrain from violent behavior.

  • 11 months later...
Posted
I have warned my wife, if we are ever in danger of attack, "for God's sake stand back and give me some room."

Exactly the same thing I've told my wife..get behind me and away from me because I will be moving fast and don't want to accidently hurt her, or have to worry about her.

If you don't want to stand behind our troops, please..feel free to stand in front of them.


Student since January 1975---4th Dan, retired due to non-martial arts related injuries.

Posted
The standard situational awareness, looking for exits and the like, would be the place to start. While boyfriend is distracting in a fence position, girlfriend should be looking for escape routs. From there on, positioning would be important. Boyfriend in front, fencing out, getting "big" to cover up the girlfriend. If backing away is necessary, it should be the girlfriend's job to guide the boyfriend in case there are some detritus that could be tripped over or anything like that. A light touch on the back, a quick word of warning, etc. (or roles can be switched, boyfriend doesn't have to be the hero...).

I've taught this method as well (great minds!). The person in front presents themselves as a larger target while the person in the back immediately & quietly dials 911. This works best when the rear person is mostly shielded and no one can see what's going on back there. So I taught a simple swaying backing-up canter that allowed for a simple fluid movement. It creates distance from the potential attackers and the side-to-side movement in the rearward movement allows for the focus to go toward the front person. Upon connecting with 911 the rear person can hide their head if possible and speak their location before hiding the phone. Otherwise if violence breaks out that person can shout their location as they place the phone in their pocket.

As you can guess this method works well in establishing a fast, practiced response to a front-facing threat. Ideally it works with a minimum of potential attackers. e.g. 1-2. Any more than this and the additional people will likely be able to fan out and see what the rear person is up to.

In addition it helps the pair work together instead of performing random acts that could endanger themselves. For example one person grabbing the arm/arms of their companion.

It is best to use this as a foundational technique insofar as it teaches co-operation, gaining distance from attackers, responding fluidly & quickly to a potentially dangerous situation, and contacting help if possible. I'll encourage everyone who reads this to experiment with it, have fun with it, and you can come up with some creative things to do.

.

The best victory is when the opponent surrenders

of its own accord before there are any actual

hostilities...It is best to win without fighting.

- Sun-tzu

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