Doubt in skills/Pressure testing.

[Groinstrike]

I have been training 3-5 days a week for over 5 years now. I also have begun a career in law enforcement. I find myself having thoughts about getting into situations where my training fails me and wondering if i have trained hard enough or in the right areas to win a true blue knock down drag out brawl. I of course know the answer is yes, however i find myself still having doubts. I understand it is normal to have these thoughts. Lt. Col. Dave Grossman in his book "On Combat" stats that based on his research most warriors have initial doubts in there training. I think most warriors have the dream where they are in a fight and cannot hurt their opponent, or cannot pull the trigger on their weapon no matter how hard they squeeze.

I find myself struggling with these doubts, I have yet to be in a real fight in my life and i sometimes find myself bummed out after training if i feel i have not grasped the skills presented to me. I can think of no greater fear than failing in an engagment after years of training. Bujin Bugei Jutsu has been one of the few constants in my life in the past few years and I feel that it would not be the art that failed me but myself that failed the art.

My question is can we truly know ourselves and our arts until we have been thrust into the nightmare realm of combat. I think the answer in no. We can train, sweat and bleed but we cannot truly pressure test our skills until we have been exposed to the unpredicable realm that is a fight to keep yourself from great bodily harm or death. As a LEO I have already made the choice that if i must take a life, I will without hesitation. What i am struggling with is when the chips are down and you are losing the fight, have i worked hard enough at my training to pull through.

That is the real issue here, the concepts and the techniques that have been made available to me are without question effective. I doubt my fortitude, resolve and work ethic.

Sorry if these is less of a topic and more of a airing of my self-consiousness.

[JonWal]

Good topic, I think your feelings are natural. Although you also need to think about, what could succeed in one situation may fail in another. Nothing is guaranteed.

I'm only setting off on a martial arts journey and I often think how Id react in a confrontation situation.

Does the correct situational reaction become second nature over time? Or is this something that constantly evolves as you progress.

[MasterPain]

We need to sign you up for a fight. Give yourself the feel of fighting in an adrenal state without all the dangerous variables.

[kensei]

Groinstrike,

Your fears are justified in many ways. Their is NO perfect training experience to help you win every fight. Their will always be a fighter/opponent out their that is faster, stronger, has a better style suited for a specific situation or just has better luck than you.

Striking arts can teach you how to fight at a distance that you are safe from wrestling with a guy, but as an officer of the law...well you have to grapple a bit.

Wrestling will teach you how to lock up, take guys down and hold them...but imagine if their is more than one!

BJJ and ground skills will teach you how to defend yourself on the ground...but again think about two or three guys!

My advice as a former Second Lt. in the Canadian military with tones of experience working doors as a security guard...learn how to strategically and tactfully use your GUN! That is the great equalizer here mate!

If you dont have a gun but do have a batton, learn how to use that fast and also you have one other big advantage...No matter what gang of guys you face...You have a bigger gang backing you up! USE BACK UP. Thier is power in numbers!

As for your training, trust in the training that it will fail you once and a while so you have to be ready for when everything goes south on you, you need back ups and you need to be smart enough to realize that your training will not work in specific situations and have an idea of what the heck to do in that case.

One time while working a door I was confronted by five guys, all bikers and bigger than me. I knew I could take out about two or three on a good night..but not all five...and not if they were armed...so, I retreated to the bar and six of us came back out and tossed them off property. No shame in being smarter than the other guy!

[Groinstrike]

Groinstrike,

Your fears are justified in many ways. Their is NO perfect training experience to help you win every fight. Their will always be a fighter/opponent out their that is faster, stronger, has a better style suited for a specific situation or just has better luck than you.

Striking arts can teach you how to fight at a distance that you are safe from wrestling with a guy, but as an officer of the law...well you have to grapple a bit.

Wrestling will teach you how to lock up, take guys down and hold them...but imagine if their is more than one!

BJJ and ground skills will teach you how to defend yourself on the ground...but again think about two or three guys!

My advice as a former Second Lt. in the Canadian military with tones of experience working doors as a security guard...learn how to strategically and tactfully use your GUN! That is the great equalizer here mate!

If you dont have a gun but do have a batton, learn how to use that fast and also you have one other big advantage...No matter what gang of guys you face...You have a bigger gang backing you up! USE BACK UP. Thier is power in numbers!

As for your training, trust in the training that it will fail you once and a while so you have to be ready for when everything goes south on you, you need back ups and you need to be smart enough to realize that your training will not work in specific situations and have an idea of what the heck to do in that case.

One time while working a door I was confronted by five guys, all bikers and bigger than me. I knew I could take out about two or three on a good night..but not all five...and not if they were armed...so, I retreated to the bar and six of us came back out and tossed them off property. No shame in being smarter than the other guy!

Ive been training in firearms for longer than martial arts. Since i was about 12 years old. Once again the question isn't that i haven't trained the right things, its is will i be able to apply it in real combat. Paper targets or one thing, human beings are another.

I think this is when the use of simunnitions comes in handy in what Grossman calls "combat stress innoculation".

[sensei8]

Having doubt is natural, but imho, I believe that that initial doubt is replaced after one's experienced their first test by fire.

Fortunate or not fortunate is up to one to discern within themselves, and in that, I've experienced test by fire situations from time to time during my life.

We're taught and drilled endlessly, but until we're within the fires test, we doubt its effectiveness until we see that 'it' does work.

I no longer doubt because there is NO opponent, and if there is no opponent, then there is no fear, and if there is no fear, doubt cannot exist.

[kensei]

Groin strike,

I hear ya. I once read a statistic while in officer training in the army that more Canadian and American soldiers died because they had a German in their cross hairs and could not pull the trigger knowning that the "Paper target" was now human.

[tallgeese]

Concern is natural. The best thing you can do now is: a) continue to train realistically; and b) relax and accept that it's just a matter of time. Relax and let remote control take over. Don't over think it.

MP makes a good suggestion. One of the big leg ups I had was some full contact comps behind me that took that one step closer to reality before reality hit me. Consider it a training tool on the way to your goal of pressure testing your reactions.

Now, once you've considered all that, remember that controlled aggression is your friend when the hair on the back of your neck says "Go!" There isn't a situation in LE involving your use of violence that gets better by adopting a defensive attitude and posture.

[bushido_man96]

I've had the exact feelings you have listed here, and even the dreams where I couldn't hurt anyone. Those are so frustrating. I just try to use those times to motivate myself through, and every time there is something physical at work, I learn a bit more. I'm still far from getting past those feelings, though.

[yamesu]

I think everyone goes through these feelings. Me, I get them poping up every now and again.

One thing I do now know difinitively is - it does not matter how much bigger/better/more fit you are than another person. It can come down to timing, angles or even the wrong slip of a big toe that throws balance off enough to put you in a bad position. Small men can beat giants by pure luck alone.

Even when in control of adrenal response (which is a must to begin with), there are too many other variables to say "Yes, this skill of mine will work". Combat is chaotic, and there is no telling which way it will go until it is over.

In short - I dont think there is any one answer to this quandry.