putting back on my white belt

[Shizentai]

I didn't know what time it started so I arrived at quarter to six o'clock figuring that is the earliest most could reasonably arrive from work. No one was there but the door was open, so I entered and sat with no shoes in a chair near the edge of the floor. The expansive room smelled of pinesol and old wood and was silent save the scuffles and passing conversations from people on the street. On the wall were several photos of my old sensei and my new sensei standing together in groups of other people.

Five, ten, twenty minutes passed as I sat alone. It was a strange way to come to know a place. I began to wonder if it was safe to leave the dojo open like that. I began to wonder if there was a person in this neighborhood who would dare to break into a karate school. I went over in my mind what I would do in the drastically unlikely event that someone did come in and decide to rob the place while I was the only one sitting there in the corner, with a letter I couldn't read in my hand, and a gi with two belts in my bag.

Then all at once in the far corner of the room I saw a grey-haired man enter and shuffle into the office across the training area from me. No sooner did I rise to my feet than did a senpai enter right behind me. After introductions, I was escorted downstairs to the locker room where I donned my favorite training gi and examined the two belts I brought with me. Two surgeries, eight months, and a 1300 mile move later, I felt as though my black belt had better wait for another day.

As I tied my white belt, I was surprised to see that for the first time it fit just right. Either in my illness or in my recent attempts to feed myself on a graduate student's budget I must have lost more weight than I realized. Dressed all in white, free of labels or expectations I ascended the steps to the training floor. For a moment I felt pure and new... Upon seeing me enter another senpai promptly pulled me into the utility closet to prepare rags for cleaning the floor.

Through the ringing out of rags, the scrubbing, getting pulled into place and being chastised for hesitations and errors in formality, I knew that wearing a white belt was the right choice. In life, I have found that the best way I can get respect from others is to give it first. Soon my senpai would come to know me, but first I want to belong here, in this hall where people shout, where I am a floor washer, where I get advice freely given to me, where I can be part of something bigger than myself. After kihon we were asked to perform our tokui kata while facing a large set of mirrors.

Despite my inadequacies, in a white belt my kanku sho never looked so good.

[JusticeZero]

It's good to hear from you! Where in the world are you now, and what good things have you been achieving? I was worried that like so many others, you had drifted away, always to leave me wondering whatever happened to you, like a good book from a trilogy that you can't find the others to.

[Shizentai]

Hi Justice!

Yes, I moved to the east coast to try to get a PhD (=_= long road ahead though). I've been pretty busy with moving and proposals and teaching and what not, but I'm finally starting to get settled into a new state of normal now. I'm still missing New Orleans a fair bit though. How have you been?

[JusticeZero]

Good, trying to get finals dealt with. Need to figure out what class not to take next semester, since they're all good but I need the comp prep IS too. Trying to get input on when to schedule training for next semester.

[bushido_man96]

Welcome back to training!

I have to say, that opening post was so well written, I thought I was reading the opening chapter of a novel. Seriously, awesome. Now, I want to read the rest of the book...

Ever thought of being a writer? Welcome back.

[Lupin1]

I was thinking the same thing-- beautiful writing. You should tell us more as you go! There aren't enough good karate novels out there. At least not that I've found.

[Dobbersky]

OSU, I think everyone should put on a white belt every now and again to give that humbling experience as to where they came from and what they've achieved

[Shizentai]

Thanks guys! I like to write, so that mean's a lot to me.

A novel seems very different from the comic books and poetry I'm used to writing. This was mostly kind-of a "spirit-moved-me" type situation, but I'll see if I can keep it up.

[bushido_man96]

OSU, I think everyone should put on a white belt every now and again to give that humbling experience as to where they came from and what they've achieved

Yes it is. When I put on the white belt for Aikido, it was just great for me. I was a student again.

Thanks guys! I like to write, so that mean's a lot to me.

A novel seems very different from the comic books and poetry I'm used to writing. This was mostly kind-of a "spirit-moved-me" type situation, but I'll see if I can keep it up.

You're very welcome. So well written. Now you've up the ante for your post quality.

[DWx]

Great post Shizentai

Look forward to reading more