I was asked to spar as part of a BB test.

[wagnerk]

...After a few minutes I walked over and gave the guy a hug and said he did a good job but he was clearly irritated...

It could be that he was more irritated with himself. I know that I've gotten really irritated with myself after not performing as well as I know I could (and should) have, especially when I went from my Shodan (while the exam itself was a blur, there are aspects that I remember).

[GeoGiant]

I've spoken with a few BBs since the test. Apparently more than one BB wanted to fail this guy but they didn't want to express their feelings because they knew that our instructor didn't feel the same way. I always knew that there was some animosity between some of the BBs and this person but I didn't know how deep it ran. Don't get me wrong, this guy has always worked hard and he has always been at class since I've been training there but he seems to have some kind of inside tract with the instructor. I don't know if its an age thing... older guy been training for years but something beyond his control always happens when he's finally ready to test ... etc, so the instructor has empathy for him... I don't know but whatever "it" is the other BBs don't share it.

I've spoken with the guy twice and made an effort to really chat with him, no heavy discussion or talk of (dare I say it ) feelings, but just general chit-chat and he seems to have moved beyond whatever his feelings were - thankfully.

I love my dojo and the people that train there, the last thing I want to see is some divide occur.

[yamesu]

This stuff is thrown at us all the time and sometimes it's not just to test the one being tested.

I agree. This is a very interesting point.

I am not one for going to hammer my training partners - we are there to better ourselves adn others.... but if someone wants to throw a heavy kick during a sparring match - well, Ill see your kick with one of my own This does not mean that I will lose my cool and revert to being a caveman, but sometimes meeting force with force can be a great teacher!

[sensei8]

This stuff is thrown at us all the time and sometimes it's not just to test the one being tested.

I agree. This is a very interesting point.

I am not one for going to hammer my training partners - we are there to better ourselves adn others.... but if someone wants to throw a heavy kick during a sparring match - well, Ill see your kick with one of my own This does not mean that I will lose my cool and revert to being a caveman, but sometimes meeting force with force can be a great teacher!

Both posts are solid.

The only mutual hammering I do is with Greg, our Kancho. But we don't lose our cools, and this is how WE train together. For us, it's a chess game, seeing who can best the other first, and trust me, both Greg and I know how to have our turns at the other...otherwise known as a receipt. Give me one hard and you're going to get one back and then some. This again, is a mutual hammering session that we wouldn't do with anyone else, in or out of the Hombu.

When I tested for my Rokudan-Hachidan, my Kumite sessions were with Greg and no one else per my Dai-Soke because we do hammer each other relentlessly.

[GeterDone]

I'm not a black belt yet but for the grading in the dojo I attend, the Sensei tends to pair the student being tested with someone who will offer more than just a small challenge. We often have brown and black belt students from other karate styles, mostly Shotokan, so they will spar with the student, although never to their full capabilities. In tests for higher belt levels, he sometimes has the student spar multiple opponents one after the other, although he ensures sparring is always toward the end of the test when they're warmed up and getting tired.

I've sometimes been angry after a sparring session. This never was directed toward my sparring partner, even if they are better than me because if I'm going to succeed, it's on my shoulders, not his/hers. I sometimes get angry that I didn't do my best and even if I were to lose regardless, I always feel I could've and should've done more. The only time I truly have gotten angry was when my sparring partner did illegal moves and cheap shots at me despite being warned for them beforehand. Accidents are of course going to happen but getting kicked in the boys more than 3 times and poked in the eye twice seems more than accidental to me.

[JusticeZero]

Apparently more than one BB wanted to fail this guy but they didn't want to express their feelings because they knew that our instructor didn't feel the same way.

Sounds like groupthink, which is how most mistakes happen. People have reservations, but nobody wants to say anything. This is the point where people need to say "I'm willing to go with whatever your final decision is, but - if it was my decision, I wouldn't do this."