I hit too harshly...

[conrad665]

Hi,

I tried hard to be calmer during sparring in these two weeks,and it worked-partially.I started to work against a column in the sports hall without protection:if I can't control my attacks,it causes harm on me,so I work out more carefully.And deep breathing really works. But now there is another problem:Our trainer(a senpai,sensei is not coming these days) always treats me as if I am an uncontrollable,dangerous beast although he knows I'm trying to overcome anger.He's always warning me while we're working as pairs or sparring-'Don't be too harsh,we don't want injuries,be careful..' Now he is my new stress factor.He drives me crazy!I hope I won't be like before.

[Throwdown0850]

Hi,

I tried hard to be calmer during sparring in these two weeks,and it worked-partially.I started to work against a column in the sports hall without protection:if I can't control my attacks,it causes harm on me,so I work out more carefully.And deep breathing really works. But now there is another problem:Our trainer(a senpai,sensei is not coming these days) always treats me as if I am an uncontrollable,dangerous beast although he knows I'm trying to overcome anger.He's always warning me while we're working as pairs or sparring-'Don't be too harsh,we don't want injuries,be careful..' Now he is my new stress factor.He drives me crazy!I hope I won't be like before.

The solution is simple, be calm, pull your punches...

[joesteph]

If I might refer to it from my own experience, Conrad, the bright spot is that at least you have contact sparring. My sparring is non-contact, so I got into a load of trouble in the past (from white belt [10th gup] to orange [8th gup]), not for contact but for being too aggressive. I know that "too" may seem odd, especially when it's non-contact, but it does turn out that the adults who take Soo Bahk Do with me really want sparring to be sports-oriented, not a form of self-defense. To my teacher's credit, she does include truly self-defense exercises every so often, which isn't in the official curriculum, but these are things that I believe she learned (and is still learning) from her studies in Vee Arnis JuJitsu.

You obviously have the skill, the technique, and are working on the emotional. I can tell from your last post that you're making headway. It's possible that an admonition to you may actually be meant to be heard by your sparring partner, who might be apprehensive about sparring with you. If your senpai seems to be talking to both of you while supposedly directing his caution to just you, the possibility is more plausible.

[tallgeese]

Don't let the comment stress you. Remember, he just has to look out for the safety of everyone It's a professional admonishment, not a personal one.

The less you focus on the stress of it, the more likley you are to reel in your emotions.

[WireFrame]

conrad665, it's great that your working on physical control (good method too, I've used it myself), and when the trainer said this, just take it on board and not as a slight on you, because it shouldn't be. If he sees that you become aggrivated by just that then it'll take longer for him to treat you otherwise. If you just take it on board, agree, and get on with controlled sparring without giving the comment any negative reaction, the trainer will relax more.