Dating in the dojo

[CTTKDKing]

I don't have any problem with students dating other students, but instructor dating students seems very unprofessional. If the instructor and a student of the opposite sex click and want to try dating then I think the student should no longer train there. It could make things very awkward in the studio for other students, as others have acknowledged, especially if the relationship were to end. This is of course just my opinion. If you believe differently don't listen to me. I do believe there are exceptions to every rule, but there is a certain edict that I believe should be followed in a martial arts studio.

[Blade96]

I think it can be a bit of trouble but - and i thought i still believed dojo relationships wouldnt work.

I still think the teacher/student dating is a can of worms. I dont have anything to do with my sensei's like that.

That said, there is this sandan in my dojo......and he's been my bf since april

and of course they all found out about it, the senseis and stuff because we were always together.

although they told sandan a warning something about getting involved with kyus.....they wont interfere. Personal relationships are not sensei's business. They can only control what goes on in the dojo.

[still kicking]

I dated another karate student, years ago. We were peers, pals, dojo buddies, both brown and then black belts. I was madly in love, I didn't know what happened, The point is...no one wanted to leave, we each felt it was our dojo and didn't want to leave, refusing to relenquish a place that had been so important to us. I ended up leaving first, but in the end we both drifted away because it was too hard. (Though I did come back 20 or so years later.)

My point is dojo relationships will happen because we are human. However, it is good if we can take the time to weigh out how this new relationship might impact our training. Just a thought

[evergrey]

What if the couple was already established in a relationship, and the girlfriend of the sensei decided that she had an interest and wished to train under him?

[sensei8]

What if the couple was already established in a relationship, and the girlfriend of the sensei decided that she had an interest and wished to train under him?

Imho, that's fine just as long as the floor is seperate from the relationship!

My wife and my daughter train under me, but, when I'm on the floor, I'm not honey or dad, no, I'm the instructor and they're the students. It's just that simple.

Can a instructor seperate himself/herself from the relationship long enough to teach effective martial arts effectively? I can and I do!

[Blade96]

My wife and my daughter train under me, but, when I'm on the floor, I'm not honey or dad, no, I'm the instructor and they're the students. It's just that simple.

Can a instructor seperate himself/herself from the relationship long enough to teach effective martial arts effectively? I can and I do!

with my bf and i its the same. In the dojo we dont know each other. 'Oh i dunno this guy' He is Senpai and i treat him as such. and call him senpai.

and he's not our sensei so I avoid the can of worms, whooo!

[xKITAx]

I think it could work within certain relationship dynamics, and work quite well. But there is, of course, potential for disaster as well. I'd try to look at it on a case by case basis.

^ i agree ^

but 1 thing I can say is atleast they both have at least 1 common interest...

[Akikazeninja]

I just say no because one of my friends ( a girl) was dating this guy in her dojo so when they broke up she said it was really awkward and she quit so it kinda ruined her MA for her

[bushido_man96]

I just say no because one of my friends ( a girl) was dating this guy in her dojo so when they broke up she said it was really awkward and she quit so it kinda ruined her MA for her

This is just something people have to get past. If I quit everything I ever loved because someone I took issue with was involved with it as well, then I probably wouldn't be doing very much. Hell, I wouldn't have the job I have now if I quit because someone I didn't like worked there, too. Its just the nature of things, and if one enjoys the activity enough, they'll figure out a way to tolerate it and stay with it.

[etali]

The dojo I train at is ran by a husband and wife team. The lady is 3rd Dan, and the man just got his 2nd Dan. Originally, the man was the higher belt, but he was ill for many years and had to stop his training - he continued teaching, but wasn't able to really practice himself.

There are lots of other couples within the school, and lots of families that train together.

I don't see any problem with dating in a dojo as long as the personal life is left at the door, and as long as gradings are done by a different instructor.