If the confrontation cant be avoided....

[sensei8]

The National average Police response time to a 911 call = 3 minutes! Alot of bad things can happen in 3 minutes! Now, that's nationally, therefore, what is the normal response time for the Police to a 911 call in YOUR town/city? It could be 8 minutes or it could be 13 minutes or longer. That's alot...of bad things that could happen...to you...or to your friend(s)...or to your family.

When does something become unavoidable? Usually this is when it's way too late because whatever it is, it's already escalated to far! When it's too late...one better get it on or get on stepping! Recognize the unavoidable before it reaches that point. How do you know what that point is? You don't! Why? Because you don't know just how the other person(s) think; calm or trigger happy! What kind of day has this person(s) had? Many things stir the pot, but, what are the ingredients in the pot? This part is unknown! You know you...and...you know when you've reached the unavoidable...but...that's as far as it goes! Anything else...you just assume...and we know what happens when one assumes...it's worse when one assumes wrongly with their life.

[algernon]

In my way of thinking, an unavoidable situation is when you can't run away . . .

To me, it's when you shouldn't have to. There have been times that I could have avoided a fight by leaving, running, or giving them what they want (once something as simple as a seat in a park). I am a very slight man (about 5'6" and 125lb.), and each one took that as an opportunity to control me by force or threats. That is wrong; I am not required to yield to anyone who happens to have greater biceps. I will fight with fist, foot, tooth, and nail for what is right, and I am no less justified by the fact that I could have avoided causing or receiving injury. To bow to these brutes would be a worse consequence than my swollen lip or my oppressor's broken nose.

Edmund Parker said it well:

"Should it be a matter of life or death, of right or wrong, then here are my weapons . . . "

[JusticeZero]

To me, it's when you shouldn't have to. There have been times that I could have avoided a fight by leaving, running, or giving them what they want (once something as simple as a seat in a park).

You would rather save face and protect your ego than walk away and save yourself from a possible trip to the prison, hospital, or morgue? Not something that I would particularly want to see in one of -my- students, really...

I feel that it is more important to be left than it is to be right.

You may not be 'required' to yield to someone who feels that they can throw their weight around. Understand though, that they are not 'required' to refrain from pulling out a knife, gun, friend with steel toed boots, or lawyer/crooked police officer friend on speed dial if the resulting head butting clash of egos does not go in the way that they initially prefer, either.

[Nobodysaidbella]

I agree with JusticeZero.

Confrontation is avoidable up until the first punch is thrown (which should always be by them). Besides messing/sparring with my friends, I have no desire to get into fights. I don't want to show off and break off someone's arm or leg in the name of self-defense just because they shoved me. That's not why I train... to be the aggressor. Besides, martial artists can be liable in situations like that. If a girl tried to pick a fight with me, I could go to town and break every bone in her body, but who's at fault? (Obviously since I'm a girl, it'd be different if a guy tried to attack me).

I was told a story once about one of those little Buddhist monk/martial artists who was walking down the street at night, and was being followed by some thugs. Every time he asked them to stop, they'd laugh and harrass him. Having had enough, he kicked over a stop sign. THAT stopped them.

Edited September 17, 2009 by Nobodysaidbella

[bushido_man96]

In my way of thinking, an unavoidable situation is when you can't run away . . .

To me, it's when you shouldn't have to. There have been times that I could have avoided a fight by leaving, running, or giving them what they want (once something as simple as a seat in a park). I am a very slight man (about 5'6" and 125lb.), and each one took that as an opportunity to control me by force or threats. That is wrong; I am not required to yield to anyone who happens to have greater biceps. I will fight with fist, foot, tooth, and nail for what is right, and I am no less justified by the fact that I could have avoided causing or receiving injury. To bow to these brutes would be a worse consequence than my swollen lip or my oppressor's broken nose.

Edmund Parker said it well:

"Should it be a matter of life or death, of right or wrong, then here are my weapons . . . "

I can see where you are coming from here, and I can't say that I have never felt that way before, either. Being bullied isn't fun, nor should it be tolerated. There are times when discretion is the better part of valor, and there are times when action, or inaction to respond to rude requests, is the way to go, as well.