R-E-S-P-E-C-T...what does it mean to us?

[white owl]

I am excited to meet more martial artists, but that doesn't mean I automatically respect them. Now, if I am at a tournament with my Sensei and he shows respect for a very high dan rank or someone he's trained with, I will automatically show my respect in that case, because I know my Sensei and so forth.

Something that grates me as a kyu belt, I at times feel like dan ranks look at me and feel "you're just a kyu" without seeing what I can do, or what I can be taught, especially given my disability. Dont' automatically DISRESPECT me either. Does that make sense?

I kind of do the same thing if I see my sensei show some one a lot of respect I follow suit, I kind of been doing tournaments for 3 years and have learned what to look for in people to know who to give respect and who not.

Erin with the regard of your peers hang in there all kyu ranks go through this until I do not know how to say this with out being miss understood but hear it goes until you earn it. I know you have stated that you have a disability they know this. The thing is they have probably seen so many people not hack it and they may think you are one of them so you got to prove them wrong. Erin do not take this the wrong way I am just going by what you wrote and I am not in your dojo to see it differently.

[Erin]

Oh no, don't worry I dont' take it wrong. I know it simply a fact in the MA world. I was just adding my two cents in. I'd rather earn the respect, I don't want anything handed to me by any means.

[white owl]

Oh no, don't worry I dont' take it wrong. I know it simply a fact in the MA world. I was just adding my two cents in. I'd rather earn the respect, I don't want anything handed to me by any means.

Good attitude and you probably all ready then have there respect and just do not know it I know that I feel this way sometimes to from my sensei's and my peers being in a all mans class and being the only woman(there is a another woman but hardly ever there) feel like he does not want me there sometimes. But I know he does but still the testosterone runs pretty high alot in class.

[bushido_man96]

I have respect for most martial arts teachers. There are some that I have no respect for because they teach things that are contradictory to what martial arts are supposed to be.

Could you give an example of what these things would be, in your eyes?

I am excited to meet more martial artists, but that doesn't mean I automatically respect them. Now, if I am at a tournament with my Sensei and he shows respect for a very high dan rank or someone he's trained with, I will automatically show my respect in that case, because I know my Sensei and so forth.

Even in this case, I would be leary. At times, we tend to get very caught up in how we view our instructors, and then how they view someone else. I think that it is important to listen, learn, meet, and then make our own decisions on who earns our respect and who doesn't.

Something that grates me as a kyu belt, I at times feel like dan ranks look at me and feel "you're just a kyu" without seeing what I can do, or what I can be taught, especially given my disability. Dont' automatically DISRESPECT me either. Does that make sense?

I agree here, but would replace the work respect with the word courtesy. Again, I don't feel that anyone has to repsect me right off the bat. I would appreciate the courtesy be shown to me, though.

[Traymond]

I believe it is healthy for us all to have a differant aspect of respect otherwise we would end up being something like a mass production or robots respecting all the same people and disrespecting all the rest.

I show a mutual respect to all people unless I am first disrespected but the Teachers and masters of martial arts always have a higher place in my terms of respect.

[The BB of C]

I have respect for most martial arts teachers. There are some that I have no respect for because they teach things that are contradictory to what martial arts are supposed to be.

Could you give an example of what these things would be, in your eyes?

My list of that is a mile long. Check it out.

I've had teachers tell me to move faster and not tell me how. I've had teachers tell me that I have a bad strategy while I was beating them with it. I've had teachers tell me to stretch and warm up on the same level as the rest of the class when I was easily twice as flexible as all of them. I've had teachers tell me not to use certain kicks when those kicks were in the curriculum. I've had teachers tell me that tag and step-sparring is a good way to develop self defense instinct. I've had teachers tell me that their style is "too deadly" and that's why they don't spar in class. I've had teachers tell me that simply because I was a lower belt I was physically incapable of doing things like breakfalls, handsprings, flips, splits, certain kicks, certain throws - in some cases of that I was already better than the teacher at it. I've seen teachers make students warm up way past their level and expect them to keep up (I'm all for making people work ultra hard but there's that and there's excessive).

There's more but I can't remember them off the top of my head. It's when I see and/or hear things like this that martial artists and instructors lose a lot of points with me.

[Traymond]

I've had teachers tell me that simply because I was a lower belt I was physically incapable of doing things like breakfalls, handsprings, flips, splits, certain kicks, certain throws

I went through that alot...

one teacher told me to do a straight up front kick, so I did it for a few times and the finally I decided to mix it up and did a double kick, well the teacher grabbed my ankle and twisted me around so I "instinctively" kicked him in the face.

Then he gets mad at me for defending myself so he wanted me to apologize, I told him that was impossible, and I left. I respected him until he disrespected me.

[bushido_man96]

I have respect for most martial arts teachers. There are some that I have no respect for because they teach things that are contradictory to what martial arts are supposed to be.

Could you give an example of what these things would be, in your eyes?

My list of that is a mile long. Check it out.

I've had teachers tell me to move faster and not tell me how. I've had teachers tell me that I have a bad strategy while I was beating them with it. I've had teachers tell me to stretch and warm up on the same level as the rest of the class when I was easily twice as flexible as all of them. I've had teachers tell me not to use certain kicks when those kicks were in the curriculum. I've had teachers tell me that tag and step-sparring is a good way to develop self defense instinct. I've had teachers tell me that their style is "too deadly" and that's why they don't spar in class. I've had teachers tell me that simply because I was a lower belt I was physically incapable of doing things like breakfalls, handsprings, flips, splits, certain kicks, certain throws - in some cases of that I was already better than the teacher at it. I've seen teachers make students warm up way past their level and expect them to keep up (I'm all for making people work ultra hard but there's that and there's excessive).

There's more but I can't remember them off the top of my head. It's when I see and/or hear things like this that martial artists and instructors lose a lot of points with me.

Thanks for the list. That clears it up for me.

[Blade96]

Bushido,

do you respect teachers in general?

I do...and most martial artists that teach do...and im sure you do as well.

We hold a high regard to teachers no matter what style they are because they earned it and they are our superior. Alot of people dont do that...if you look at the 50's and his decade it is totally differant the respect is gone...and I like to think that when parent's put their kids into martial arts it is helping them a bit.

and Either way whether their is verbal or physical conflict and if their isn't any all...still nothing good happens...nothing is accomplished. But I would prefer to make them know their mistakes if the outcome is the same no matter what.

Thats just my opinion on how things unfolded to me...but im just one so it is not meant to be taken to heart.

Well, I look at respect a bit differently than most would, I guess. I am not one to just respect someone because of some preconceived notion of stature or rank. See 9th dan, show respect....I'm not quite like that. Although I won't be disrespectful to them, I am going to have to know a bit more about someone before I offer some kind of blind respect to them. Now, this doesn't mean that I would treat them poorly, or say "sorry, I don't respect you yet..." or anything like that. I like to think that I am a generally nice person, and treat people as such when I encounter them. But, there is a difference in being nice to someone, and respecting them.

I am a big proponent of earning respect, not demanding or expecting it.

Blade96 likes this. =]

its my own belief that its a person's character and heart that determines how much respect they should get, not what pretty colored belt they wear. The reason why I love all my elders in my shotokan dojo is because they've got all that in addition to their black belts and Dan certificates. and they taught well, respect us all and don't treat me different than anyone else. They treat me wonderfully. That makes them excellent people. excellent leaders worth following, listening to and looking up to. (I do think they have favorites though, and I am one of them, my sensei pays more attention to me and even praises me up in front of the whole class, he never did that with the other 2 white belts.)

In contrast when I was in the royal canadian army cadets I had this officer who, though having the rank of lieutenant (leftenant in the canadian system, derived from britain) who was a total jerk. He put students on the spot in a bad way and used some of them, including myself, as examples of what bad drill was. (i never had bad drill but because I was born with a balance problem I stumbled a bit at times.) So although I followed orders well and was a great leader, was never late unless i was forced to be (though i joined late in the year of season 1995- 1996 I was promoted ahead of most of the other cadets who had been there longer when promotions were held in October of 96 which caused some jealousy) and even though this officer had the rank of lieutenant I could never respect him because of the way he treated some people.

btw *sings* R-E-S-P-E-C-T .... find out what it means to me"

Just kidding. cause the way the topic title is written reminds me of that old aretha franklin song. =]

[WireFrame]

See, alot of people read the word "respect" and translate it as "being polite and not being rude".

What Respect means to me, in the dojo, is this:

Knowing that the sensei, or your sparring partner, or the black belt, or even the beginner, work hard the same as you. Everyone in that room, at that moment is doing the same thing in terms of putting forth all their effort and energy to improve and perfect themselves in as much as they can.

Someone could be an expert at executing the perfect ushiro geri, or they may have just started to learn how to punch straight. Each individual's mastery of any technique or art is part of their own journey and it is their achievement that they own and have worked for.

You may be more experienced than another person, or they may be more experienced than you. But in that room, your effort is equal, and neither one of you is finished yet.

That is what respect means to me in the dojo, equality of character.