Pair Works......Am I being too dramatic?

[nanook660]

I was wondering if anyone here could offer me some advice.

When we do pair works and we do Ippon Me #1 (Jodan Uke) and Nihonme #2 (Gedan Barai) since we are a small number at the 9th Level (there are 3 of us and I am the only girl) we are paired with 8th and 7th Kyu. I always seem to get paired with this big strong guy and he tends to be a bit rough on me. He twists me really hard and his punch to my back really hurts. Last week he wedged his knee into my knee and pushed it at an angle and it did hurt

Should I continue to suck it up and bear it or should I ask Sensei not to pair me with him?

Thanks

[AlwaysInTraining]

This situation has actually happened to me but the other way around as I was the guy going too hard. Im my situation the only mitigating factor that I have was that the person in question never ever said anything to me at all thoughout the entire time meaing that I was completly unaware that anything was wrong until it was too late and it left me very surprised and upset.

Subsequently when it was too late and I realsied that I was in the wrong I appolgised profusly to the person in question and to my instructors and to anyone else that it may have happened to (I was feeling very very guilty) and then I changed how I worked and am now much aware of what im doing. I have never wanted to be associated with that sort of attitude in martial arts and I have always maintained an attitude of no malice throught all my training (Ive always wanted to just have fun and train well).

My advice to you would be first to tell your partner whilst you are training that he is going too hard and to modify himself but remember he may also be unaware that he has been so treat it kindly but firmly so theres no room for missinterpretation. Secondly if he ignores you (which i doubt he would) then alert the instructor and change partners. Finally also be aware that these things do happen. We are all in a situation where we are training hard and want to do well and with adrenaline and endorphines pumping through our bodys we can all lose track of what we are capable of and we dont want issues and problems dogging us in the dojo. Good luck in your training and hope it all goes well.[/u]

[tenshinka]

Talk to the person about it...If they are unresponsive/rude etc. or pose a risk to your health, talk to your Sensei about it...If it continues...Find a new place to train...You are not their to be hurt....some discomfort is part of the package, but not abuse.

best wishes,

[bushido_man96]

My advice to you would be first to tell your partner whilst you are training that he is going too hard and to modify himself but remember he may also be unaware that he has been so treat it kindly but firmly so theres no room for missinterpretation. Secondly if he ignores you (which i doubt he would) then alert the instructor and change partners. Finally also be aware that these things do happen. We are all in a situation where we are training hard and want to do well and with adrenaline and endorphines pumping through our bodys we can all lose track of what we are capable of and we dont want issues and problems dogging us in the dojo. Good luck in your training and hope it all goes well.

This is good advise here. I think often times we are too stuck on not wanting to look like the weeney in class, complaining too much about contact levels and whatnot. However, we all need to remember the adage: "check your ego at the door." By doing so, we can prolong our training time much more. We should all try to train hard, but also train smart.

As above, give this guy a chance before speaking with the instructor. Some poeple don't know their own strength, and this could be a case of that.

Its great to be able to see both sides here. Thanks for sharing your experiences, both of you.

[Fish]

If he's 8th or 7th kyu, he probably is a little clumsy or doesn't realise his own strength, and hasn't yet learned how to use control. The others are right, have a word with him first - he may be completely unaware.

[nanook660]

If he's 8th or 7th kyu, he probably is a little clumsy or doesn't realise his own strength, and hasn't yet learned how to use control. The others are right, have a word with him first - he may be completely unaware.

I thought I would let you all know that I did talk to him tonight and he was unware that he was being a little rough but glad I told him. Tonight was easier.

Thanks everyone for your input. It is very helpful.

[AlwaysInTraining]

Glad it went well. Happy training.

[white owl]

I'm Glad it well, I am also the only woman in my class until recently but she is hardly there and she is a lot older than me and lower in rank than me and I'm afraid of hurting her. I prefer to work with the men because they make you work harder, but sometimes they do not know there own strength and tend to be rough I let them know and usually they are ok with it and tone it down.

[BDPulver]

Glad it worked out. Usually in situations like yours I always ask the person I'm training with if we are going to hard/fast/slow ect......

Even if the person out ranks me but doesnt have the years of exp. In that I am still the same rank since 93 but then I always move around but still train. Sometimes with other styles, sometimes by myself but still when I go home and attend class those that know me do respect my knowlegde of MA.

Alot of times just a simple facial expression if the other knows how to read it will let those you are pair'd with to know how there doing.

It just goes to alot of communication and understanding to let those you are with to better see how theres and your training is going.

[bushido_man96]

I'm glad it worked out for you. A little communication can help out a bit.