Instructing your own children

[white owl]

I am getting ready to test for my dan, so I am starting or teaching the classes little more than I have been.

The question I have is how do you seperate the Mother mode with your child. Exspecially when you have to correct him (for techniques)it seems when I instruct he is more sluggish, like mom is instructing so I just give 35 0/0 instead of the 100 0/0. I try to ingore him, but I do not want to do that when sensei is watching me, and I do not want him to think I would let other students do that, which they do not (or any new students that come in the future), just my own does.

My husband when he works with our son says he has to make him mad to get him to do things I told him that is not right you should not have to that.

When sensei works with our son there usually is not a problem. But it is expected of us to be able to instruct and I am told to seperate being a mother to being a sensei in our dojo and not to get mad at my son which I try not to but I get disappointed when I know he can do better than he does. But I did get a little upset at him when I ask him what color belt he was and he told me the wrong color to be sarcastic or joking, I took it sarcasticly. And made him do push ups. I'm just puzzled when it comes to him and so is my husband. So any imput would be great and if others have experience the same problem and how the dealt with it would be great.

[tallgeese]

It's difficult. I teach my kid as well and it's not easy. More for them than us I think.

I easily seperate the two. My daughter has a harder time. I try to make sure that any diciplie I have to give out during class time dosen't spill over into the home. THis keeps it seperate better. Also, don't expect them to get it as fast as you think they should. I have to constantly check myself with wodering why she can't comprehend a certain movement.

Even so, it's been a very rewarding process for myself and she seems to enjoy it as well.

[bushido_man96]

Perhaps getting your child to take a class other than the one you teach would help both ways. It seems that kids think they can get away with more when their parents run the show. Don't let them think that. In the end, you just have to do with them what you would do with another who did the same thing. Perhaps sit him out, and see if he gets the picture.

[Throwdown0850]

well, have you sat them down and asked them if they REALLY like doing martial arts? they may be the reason they aren't giving 100%??

[marie curie]

Yeh, I've seen this before. Unfortunately, the only thing that I've seen help is to be in different classes unless you are their teacher from the very beginning.

To be perfectly honest, I have a hard time in a class that my husband teaches, because I've done MA longer than him. Have you and your child been doing MA the same amount of time? Maybe they feel that they're experience is similar to yours and don't think the class is teaching them as much as when it was someone with more experience.

Anyway- just a thought

[white owl]

Yes I have ask him if he likes doing Martial Arts, and he does, But he says he does not want to take all the time, when he wants to take it, (He is a kid he wants to sit in front of the tv all day if we let him which does not happen,) so we cut him back some but when he with us when he is not taking class, he wants to get on the floor and I tell he has to sit on the chair, he does not like that to much.

As for when we started, my husband and I and my son started at the same time.

For him doing another kids class there is only one choice and he is in it. We have always help out in instructing when needed so it is nothing new to him.

[Zanshin]

Perhaps getting your child to take a class other than the one you teach would help both ways. It seems that kids think they can get away with more when their parents run the show. Don't let them think that. In the end, you just have to do with them what you would do with another who did the same thing. Perhaps sit him out, and see if he gets the picture.

Bingo,

If your kids ain't performing with you, put them under pressure with someone else.

I don't teach my children (at the moment) because I believe they are a bit too young to start training.

But TBH I am not sure that I would jump at the chance to teach them anyway. When they get to an age when they really want to learn, I will start, but to be quite frank, I would rather pay someone else to waste their time on them until that stage.

Does that sound harsh?

[Zanshin]

BTW,

My missus would probably be one of them!

But I wouldn't pay her

[granitemiller]

I think you need to separate, in his mind, when you are "mom" and when you are the "instructor". So I think that talking to him first is important, and that he should behave just like he does whenever someone else instructs.

You will also need to be extra firm with him during class. A sarcastic remark from a student is grounds for sitting out, doing pushups, or other.

Not an easy task.

[white owl]

Thank you guys for all your impute. I appreciate it.