Dealing with Insane Strangers

[Johnlogic121]

I had an experience today in which I encountered a man at a McDonald's restaurant. He struck up a conversation while we were getting our food, so we sat together to eat our meals. I'm usually sociable, so eating with a stranger is normal for me. However, as we talked, it not only turned out that this guy was a single homosexual, which doesn't bother me too badly, but it turned out that this guy was clearly schizophrenic. He had delusions that were so bad that he told me he wanted to buy an aircraft carrier and start taking people to the moon on a school bus that was modified with rocket engines. Cautiously, I only made about ten percent verbal resistance to his outlandish ideas and I studied him carefully as we talked. I tried to project a totally calm demeanor and I avoided saying or doing anything that would have made him frightened, excited, or angry. I just projected a compassionate and friendly exterior as his stories got more and more wild. Finally, I said I had to meet my wife in about fifteen minutes and I politely excused myself after exchanging names with the man as though everything were perfectly normal. He seemed happy by the way I dealt with him and didn't show any signs of wanting a fight, even though I was worried that something like that might happen. How would other people have dealt with this situation? Have you ever met a truly insane preson before? Would talking to such a person make you afraid? What could I have done if he started to become hostile? Thanks, -JL.

[Ozpunker]

I have been in a similar situation. I was with a few friends and some guy started talking to us in a similar fashion. We tried to leave a few times but he didn't seem to want to let us go. In the end I just had to be very assertive and tell him that we were leaving. We were in a somewhat busy street so I didn't worry too much about him getting aggressive. It sounds to me like you handled your situation perfectly.

[NewEnglands_KyoSa]

I would have handled it the same way.

but depending on how fearful i was i might have even put my cell phone in my hand and under the table and made it ring and answered it like it was an emergency, apologized and go.

but from the sounds of it you are very knowledgable and you handled it very well.

[bushido_man96]

I try not to interact with those that I don't know too much. I don't think I would have let myself get too caught up in that conversation before I left.

[Daisho]

I had a guy on the subway sit behind me and talk about shooting up the train a few weeks ago. Everyone else sat so still as to not provoke him, but he was directly behind me, and i'll be damned if i'm not even going to see trouble coming.

So I got up, and stood across from him so I could at least face him if he was crazy enough to be armed. I kept my ipod headphones in my ears, but kept them muted the rest of the trip.

I was seriously hoping he was just talking crazy, but i was keeping in my mind to be as quick and violent as possible if I wound up in his crosshairs.

[tallgeese]

I'm with bushido man on this one.

I don't talk to stranges at all usually, let alone the crazy variety. Being unfriendly suits me real well in situations like this. It's up and walk away, I don't have the patience for it.

[bushido_man96]

I had a guy on the subway sit behind me and talk about shooting up the train a few weeks ago. Everyone else sat so still as to not provoke him, but he was directly behind me, and i'll be damned if i'm not even going to see trouble coming.

So I got up, and stood across from him so I could at least face him if he was crazy enough to be armed. I kept my ipod headphones in my ears, but kept them muted the rest of the trip.

I was seriously hoping he was just talking crazy, but i was keeping in my mind to be as quick and violent as possible if I wound up in his crosshairs.

This is just good awareness, I think. Especially by not letting him realize that you were listening in. These are the kinds of things that you may want to document for further reference, in case something bad like what he was discussion should happen.

[Daisho]

yea bushido, the most important part was to be able to hear if he was beginning to do something stupid. I kept the phones in to also keep him from speaking to me, considering i'd stood up and faced him. I didn't want to give him an opportunity to get himself worked up, and having the phones in allowed me to stand there and not acknowledge his craziness. I knew even by getting up I was breaking a NYC code of provocation, but he was in a seat directly behind me.

Thinking back now, I find it amazing the visualization that goes on in moments like that. I wasn't thinking about training, or techniques i'd use to stop him. The only active thought was to be fast, and not get frozen. Aside from that it seemed like I was preparing myself to kill someone. I saw blood, i thought about what it would be like if i was shot, and how hard it would be to keep fighting if the wound was in a really dangerous place.

Maybe the craziest part about this was the fact that he was getting off at the next stop. But for some reason the doors on our car wouldn't open at that stop. His irateness was through the roof at this point. But by this time he was up and standing right next to me. I felt pretty comfortable because other guys on the train were starting to regain themselves and lookin me in the face as if to say they would help out, and his positioning would allow me to have his neck from behind right away. Armed or not he'd be dead long before much damage could be done from that position.

[Rateh]

Personally I wouldn't be afraid, just more aware. But I work on a daily basis with people that others might term "insane" or "crazy". I've heard that people are scared of them. To which I say .... why? And my coworker said it's because they don't know them so they don't know what to expect.

[Tiger1962]

I had an experience today in which I encountered a man at a McDonald's restaurant. He struck up a conversation while we were getting our food, so we sat together to eat our meals. I'm usually sociable, so eating with a stranger is normal for me. However, as we talked, it not only turned out that this guy was a single homosexual, which doesn't bother me too badly, but it turned out that this guy was clearly schizophrenic. He had delusions that were so bad that he told me he wanted to buy an aircraft carrier and start taking people to the moon on a school bus that was modified with rocket engines. Cautiously, I only made about ten percent verbal resistance to his outlandish ideas and I studied him carefully as we talked. I tried to project a totally calm demeanor and I avoided saying or doing anything that would have made him frightened, excited, or angry. I just projected a compassionate and friendly exterior as his stories got more and more wild. Finally, I said I had to meet my wife in about fifteen minutes and I politely excused myself after exchanging names with the man as though everything were perfectly normal. He seemed happy by the way I dealt with him and didn't show any signs of wanting a fight, even though I was worried that something like that might happen. How would other people have dealt with this situation? Have you ever met a truly insane preson before? Would talking to such a person make you afraid? What could I have done if he started to become hostile? Thanks, -JL.

Wow, you handled yourself very well and very calm indeed. I don't know if I would have been able to stay calm as you did. When something like this happens or if someone invades my personal space, I tend to become very defensive --- but then I was held up at gunpoint in the past so that's where that comes from.

Good thinking though !