What should I do?

[the undead shall feast]

I've been looking into and reading all about martial arts latly and I plan on taking jiu jitsu once I've learned a little more about it. My big brother who is around 250 lbs. , a violent drunk, and a good fighter, wants me to teach him what I learn. This guy flys off the handle over nothing sometimes, and if i tell him I'm not gonna teach him jack he'll prolly fly off the handle about that too, if i teach him one of the main purposes of my learning self defense will be in vain. what can i do to avoid these sort of conflicts with him. btw, he's the type who feels he has to be the alpha male all the time as well.....

[ninjanurse]

Do not teach him...invite him to class. If he declines, enough said. As far as domestic violence goes there are laws in this country to protect you and you should take advantage of them...for both your sakes-it sounds like your brother needs help!

[RealWingChunKuen]

I've been looking into and reading all about martial arts latly and I plan on taking jiu jitsu once I've learned a little more about it. My big brother who is around 250 lbs. , a violent drunk, and a good fighter, wants me to teach him what I learn. This guy flys off the handle over nothing sometimes, and if i tell him I'm not gonna teach him jack he'll prolly fly off the handle about that too, if i teach him one of the main purposes of my learning self defense will be in vain. what can i do to avoid these sort of conflicts with him. btw, he's the type who feels he has to be the alpha male all the time as well.....

When you do take your jiu jitsu classes and if he wants you to teach him you can be "diplomatic" and tell him that you haven't learnt anything that he doesn't know already. Whatever you do don't teach him any techniques as people who are violently inclined will be more likely to make any technique work for them.

This is because such people will enter conflicts with a lot of INTENT. Intent on its own can win you fights. Intent combined with technique can be a powerful weapon which in the wrong hands can cause a lot of damage/suffering.

[KarateEd]

Do not teach him...invite him to class.

I agree with ninjanurse. If he presses the issue do as RealWingChunKuen and AikiGuy suggest, be diplomatic, stall him, and, if you feel that you have to show him something, do it very incompetently with the excuse "hey, I just started, I haven't learned much."

Ed

[AngelaG]

If you are really worried about it and think that he won't attend class then you could try showing him stuff that doesn't work. He may get the view that what you study is rubbish and give up. Of course he will probably ridicule you for wasting your time, but as long as you don't rise to it (after all you know better) then he won't ask you to teach him any more.

[G95champ]

If your just taking it for the first time you won't be able to teach him. Yeah you can do what you do in class but you won't be able to teach him.

[danbong]

Many good ideas so far. You can also tell him that you will get introuble and kicked out of the school if you teach without being authorized.

[ps1]

Here's a couple of ideas.

Tell him you're not allowed to teach him. ie: the instructor doesn't allow it.

Tell him you're not good enough at the techniques to teach him.

Tell him you don't remember the techniques.

Teach them completely wrong, so he sees it doesn't work and stops asking.

Start teaching a technique and act like you can't remember it properly. You know say things like, "no wait, it's like this, no...like this...I just can't seem to get it."

[bushido_man96]

Do not teach him...invite him to class. If he declines, enough said. As far as domestic violence goes there are laws in this country to protect you and you should take advantage of them...for both your sakes-it sounds like your brother needs help!

I agree with this sentiment. If it is possible, seperate yourself from him. If it is not, then find someone you can talk to about it, and see what you can do about it. Stay safe.

[jaymac]

Good replies. As others have said, do not teach him. In most dojo's /dojangs, it is one of the rules that what you have been taught, is not to be shown to any non-student outside the facility, for the exact reason you are saying. Your brother would use it to hurt others and not to just defend himself. In doing so, you could be expelled from the training facility indefinetely. Tell him, if he is interested in learning, take classes from a trained instructor.