jaymac Posted February 18, 2007 Posted February 18, 2007 What gets me though, is it is those types of people who give the school a bad name. They are bad advertisement for the owner. If they are a drama queen in the dojo, just imagine the negative things they say outside of the training facility. "I got hurt by so and so while we were sparring..." Potential newcomers to the MA may be afraid to go to a place where they fear they will get injured by other students (even if this couldnt be further from the truth). A great martial artist is one who is humble and respectful of others.
baronbvp Posted February 18, 2007 Posted February 18, 2007 That's a great point, jaymac. Only as good as I make myself be, only as bad as I let myself be.Martial arts are like kinetic chess. Your move.
NightOwl Posted February 18, 2007 Posted February 18, 2007 I guess it depends on who they tell it to. The average joe? They want a MA class that gives them exercise and some SD tips, but they don't really want to fight. If they told that to someone who spars a lot, than the response might be different. Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft.~Theodore Roosevelt
learning kempo-karate Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 Hello, You should talk to your Sensi about this (In private). Suggest that both of you do not sparr with each, 2. have the Sensi ask the other person what is the problem or problems is and what he can do to help solve this? Have the Sensi ask this other person what he wants do about sparring with you? This guy might have an ego problem, not your rank but because he is bigger and feels shame to be hit by you! Since he is in close rank.Be the mature person here, everyone around you are aware of this guy since it has happen more than once...(acting in front of others too).It will not be easy since you train together often. Be the strong minded and act like an adult on this.....people will notice who is being childish....Simile and always be nice...say " did I hurt you? and simile some more.....Aloha
Sibylla Posted February 19, 2007 Author Posted February 19, 2007 What gets me though, is it is those types of people who give the school a bad name. They are bad advertisement for the owner. If they are a drama queen in the dojo, just imagine the negative things they say outside of the training facility. "I got hurt by so and so while we were sparring..." Potential newcomers to the MA may be afraid to go to a place where they fear they will get injured by other students (even if this couldnt be further from the truth). That gets me as well. I think our dojo is very good and tries to make room for all sorts of people, but that can be taken advantage of by the wrong kind of people who likes to use it as a stage for their antics. The drama queen is already badmouthing me and others. But the sensei knows it now.
Sibylla Posted February 19, 2007 Author Posted February 19, 2007 Hello, You should talk to your Sensi about this (In private). Suggest that both of you do not sparr with each, 2. have the Sensi ask the other person what is the problem or problems is and what he can do to help solve this? Have the Sensi ask this other person what he wants do about sparring with you? This guy might have an ego problem, not your rank but because he is bigger and feels shame to be hit by you! Since he is in close rank.Be the mature person here, everyone around you are aware of this guy since it has happen more than once...(acting in front of others too).It will not be easy since you train together often. Be the strong minded and act like an adult on this.....people will notice who is being childish....Simile and always be nice...say " did I hurt you? and simile some more.....AlohaI have been able to avoid sparring with him so far. I've salso had a little chat with the sensei. I think he is aware of the problems and he does keep and eye on the guy.
baronbvp Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 I think our dojo is very good and tries to make room for all sorts of people, but that can be taken advantage of by the wrong kind of people who likes to use it as a stage for their antics. This is why dojos have the right to refuse to train someone or ask them to leave. If someone is creating a dysfunctional training atmosphere, and the instructors can't control it, they can refund the balance of their money and ask them to find another, more suitable place to train. That, of course, requires the lead instructor or dojo owner to decide. Your personal option is to find yourself a more suitable place to train. Only as good as I make myself be, only as bad as I let myself be.Martial arts are like kinetic chess. Your move.
bushido_man96 Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 I think our dojo is very good and tries to make room for all sorts of people, but that can be taken advantage of by the wrong kind of people who likes to use it as a stage for their antics. This is why dojos have the right to refuse to train someone or ask them to leave. If someone is creating a dysfunctional training atmosphere, and the instructors can't control it, they can refund the balance of their money and ask them to find another, more suitable place to train. That, of course, requires the lead instructor or dojo owner to decide. Your personal option is to find yourself a more suitable place to train.These are good points. Hopefully, now that the instructor is aware of the antics that are going on, he will be actively evaluating this individual, and get set to make a decision to either chat with him about what is and is not appropriate in the dojo, or to discuss the possbility of furthering his training elsewhere.It sucks losing students, but sometimes, it is necessary in order to keep the good ones that you have. In my experience, students like this one don't tend to stick around for the long haul, anyway.Have you stated what rank this student is? If so, I think I missed it. https://www.haysgym.comhttp://www.sunyis.com/https://www.aikidoofnorthwestkansas.com
bushido_man96 Posted February 19, 2007 Posted February 19, 2007 You could give him some real hard contact, and then smile at him. See what he has to say then!Though Bushido_man96 may have been joking (I can't tell for sure) I agree with this. If he sees what real contact is, he'll shut up. Otherwise he simply shouldn't be there.Nope, not joking, really. I have seen this done, and, well, maybe been involved in "lessons" such as these in one aspect or another from time to time. Although I do not advocate learning in the martial arts this way, I do think that at times lessons like this are appropriate for students that act in such a manner.Jaymac: I agree with you, I think my instructor shouldn't allow it. But the other day, a sempai gave the drama queen a real work over during fighting. It was quite a spectacle, I could see the guy looking suprised and offended at the same time, while the sempai took no notice and just continued.. This "special treatment" might have been planned..this sempai is big and strong, and I have never seen him go so hard on kohai before. I hope it sorted the queen out!Yes, kind of like this! He didn't seem to bark out any drama queen antics when sparring the sempai, from what I can tell in your post. This will end up in one of two ways: 1. he has learned his lesson, and will continue to learn in an undisruptive manner....2. he has discovered that either this school or the MAs in general are not for him, and he will move on. Either way, this should work out well for you, Sibylla. https://www.haysgym.comhttp://www.sunyis.com/https://www.aikidoofnorthwestkansas.com
Sibylla Posted February 19, 2007 Author Posted February 19, 2007 I think our dojo is very good and tries to make room for all sorts of people, but that can be taken advantage of by the wrong kind of people who likes to use it as a stage for their antics. This is why dojos have the right to refuse to train someone or ask them to leave. If someone is creating a dysfunctional training atmosphere, and the instructors can't control it, they can refund the balance of their money and ask them to find another, more suitable place to train. That, of course, requires the lead instructor or dojo owner to decide. Your personal option is to find yourself a more suitable place to train.These are good points. Hopefully, now that the instructor is aware of the antics that are going on, he will be actively evaluating this individual, and get set to make a decision to either chat with him about what is and is not appropriate in the dojo, or to discuss the possbility of furthering his training elsewhere.It sucks losing students, but sometimes, it is necessary in order to keep the good ones that you have. In my experience, students like this one don't tend to stick around for the long haul, anyway.Have you stated what rank this student is? If so, I think I missed it. He is first kyu. Quite experienced in some other art, but it doesn't show in his behavior. I haven't heard of any being told to leave before, but then I haven't seen such behavior in the dojo before either.
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