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Posted
Great post, AikiGuy. I'd love to hear what the women think of what you just said.

I think I agree with what he said. If someone's taking martial arts and is sparring, they can expect to get hit sometimes. I've gotten hit in the chest more than once. I just shrug it off. It wasn't intentional.

When I fight a beginning women, I hit softer. But only until she becomes proficient.

I can see why you would do this, espcially to the more "soft" women who might join ma. But, shouldn't this be done to anyone who's just started. I try not to go all out on a new martial artist.

External training without the training of the mind is nothing

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Posted

I'm a girl and I'm 24 now, but I started karate when I was 11, and so most of my fully-developed life I've been doing martial arts, so over the years I've come upon this a number of times with myself, my friends, and those I teach.

You don't need advice on how to spar with a female, you need to find another school. If the instructor does not inform you ahead of time, you should spar with the same rules and guidelines for all of your sparing partners.

I completely agree. In my experience, most guys who do repeatedly hit us in the lovelies- and many do and I'm not entirely sure why- if you stop and say "Hey dude- don't do that", then they are usually pretty good to stop themselves- no big, no need for a freak out

Yeh, they can in the way for chest-area punches that aren't particularly accurate, but if you are going to hit us in the chest- like where the do-dad on a necklace hangs- it shouldn't be a problem. The solar plexus should also be clear- but I think the issue comes with maintaining your original target when both of you are moving- something that comes with practice.

Anyway, the point is that it's going to happen accidentally. It's not unreasonable to try to avoid in practice (we generally try to avoid groin shots in sparring too) but it's something that happens. Which a chest protector, I don't know what her problem was. Were you really beating her and she was embarrassed and wanted to yell about something?

Also, what's up with the punishment? Accident's happen and if the teacher saw that you were doing something wrong he should have stopped you and corrected your fighting.

When I fight a beginning women, I hit softer. But only until she becomes proficient.

I would hope that this is the same for men and children as well :) Getting knocked in the head 20 times before you get your rising block down may impair your ability to learn anything else :)

I don't agree with hitting girls.

When I have to spar with them I work more on blocking and counters rather than the usual full-frontal attack which I usually use

When I strike back I pull my blows slightly, but with enough force to show I hit the target - usually head, back and sides

Ok, so everyone's entitled to their opinion, but this drives me nuts. Not at first- I understand that girls aren't all on the same level of "ok to be hit", but once I've said, "no, you can really hit me" then that's that. I want to get something out of the sparring as well.

Well my response is this:

There are plenty of other guys in the class she can fight if she wants to get the experience - it's just against my upbringing to hit girls

I think that 'hitting girls' and sparring in class don't really fall under the same category. Maliciously striking females is not right, I agree. However, this is hardly what is being done under the supervision of an instructor in a dojo. It is a learning environment, and everyone in the dojo should be subject to the same learning experiences.

Agreed

to keep 'equal rights' punch them wherever you'd punch a male. if she is willing to spar a male, then she should know what to expect

Well, equal force is acceptable, but, Symphony-X, this would be a good way to get me to ignore the groin as an off-limits area.

Side note- Symphony-X rocks - I saw them at Gigantour.

You suck-train harder.......................Don't block with your face


A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.

-Lao Tzu

  • 4 weeks later...
Posted

wow...when i'm in a fight I don't usually think like that...( first post)my mind would be too focused on the fight (spar/match thing)..I'm not too keen on the "don't hit girls rule" it actually comes from an old mid set that girls are weaker then men and have to be handled gently. One reason why I absolutely love to spar with men. I scare them. I am not weak. Also, if they have the mind set to go easy on me..I don't return the favor >.>

go ahead, kick my in the stomachHARD ...it doesn't usually have much a(e?)ffect on me :P (random but still)

but...you could varie your attacks next time...and remember that woman have TWO privie places so we are extra weary about it and tend to complain more *nods* um..shutting up

Strike first. 'Til then i will not fight you.


Everytime someone calls JKD a style, Bruce turns over.


Why do I love Bruce Lee? Not because he was an awesome martial artist- but because his train of thought overlapped with mine even before I knew about him.

Thank you karate forums, for introducing me to Bruce Lee

  • 2 months later...
Posted

There are two girls in my dojo where i study at. and one is awesome. And tells me not to hold back when ever we spar. I tend to be a head hunter but she is way to fast for a head shot to happen. So i go for side shots when ever possible but she notices when i see a open chest shot and not take it. (i tend to get yelled at for not taking a that shot by her) i so anymore i tend to take anyshot possible male or female.

Now the other ladie is about 20 or my age. She tends (not sure if its intentional or not) but if i hit her in the chest. and go for a head kick she tends to hit alittle lower than the belt. once heard enouph to break my protector. So i can relate to spareing women are extremely tricky. and can hurt very much to. I do think your instructor over reacted and should have gotten both stores. then made her do push ups but thats just me.

  • 1 month later...
Posted
how the h**l do you fight a girl? I couldnt! I punched her a few times in the chest during a class match,where everybody watches 2 randomly picked people fight (she was a yellow belt also,but had a chest protector,I used the instructors stuff since mine is coming next week) and she just threw her headgear off and yelled:"stop punching me in private places!!!" :o ,guess what,I had to do 50 burpies (push-up position,bring feet close while in push up position,jump,repeat) and 10 minutes in "horse stance" on the wall,then I had a good yell-at from the instructor for almost 5 minutes in the bathroom :( ,trust me,its the scariest thing in your whole life,so yeah,I need some advice on sparring with a female,can someone PLEASE help?

Hahah. Being a girl myself, I actually get stuff like that a lot... the guys say "I don't want to spar against you... you're a GIRL!" I promise, if the chest gear is good quality stuff, it doesn't really matter if you punch us. Sounds to me like that girl was A) inexperienced in sparring as she was a yellow belt (she may have mistaken pressure for pain or just not have gotten that a punch to the chest isn't meant to be a perverted move) and B) was just being weird.

Just make sure you control your power and sparring girls is a breeze, my man!

La voie. La vérité. La vie.

  • 3 weeks later...
Posted

Awww! I'm a girl, and to be honest, if i got hit in the chest then it's my fault for not protecting myself!!

As a black belt, and the only female black belt in my club, i spar with guys and I was taught to protect myself. (i don't wear a chest guard.... not gonna carry one in the streets! lol)

Frankly, it was her fault she was hit in the chest, not yours! She should know how to protect herself, if she doesn't then her sensei should teach her.

LIVE ANOTHER DAY, TO FIGHT ANOTHER DAY

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

I spar with women all the time at my school. 3 out of the 7 black belts right now are women.

One in particular always raises her lead arm, exposing the side of her chest, then complains about it when I punch her in the "boob". I just tell her not to leave herself open.

If she can kick me in the groin, I can punch her in chest.

"I'd rather have 10 techniques that work for me than 100 techniques that work against me." -Ed Parker

  • 3 weeks later...
Posted

sparring with a girl,

simple, be a gentleman,

some people may say I'm sexist for that, but oh well there will always be critics, it's my upbringing.

I've had only 1 girl complain about the way I spar she was a very well respected, and one of the few black belts in my style.

She got upset that I took it easy on her. I'd rather her get upset at me for that then mauling her too hard. It's my style.

Every other girl I've sparred with, has enjoyed sparring me and often times has told me so. Makes me feel very honored and happy.

Because I have developed a volume control on how hard I go, often times when I was training I was chosen to spar with women & children.

I try not to use any physical attributes like speed, strength, explosiveness, and purely only skill.

Then all of a sudden, it gets much more challenging. On the other hand,

I try to do this with ANYBODY that I spar, as much as possible, so in a way it's not sexist or prejudice.

Posted
how the h**l do you fight a girl? I couldnt! I punched her a few times in the chest during a class match,where everybody watches 2 randomly picked people fight (she was a yellow belt also,but had a chest protector,I used the instructors stuff since mine is coming next week) and she just threw her headgear off and yelled:"stop punching me in private places!!!" :o ,guess what,I had to do 50 burpies (push-up position,bring feet close while in push up position,jump,repeat) and 10 minutes in "horse stance" on the wall,then I had a good yell-at from the instructor for almost 5 minutes in the bathroom :( ,trust me,its the scariest thing in your whole life,so yeah,I need some advice on sparring with a female,can someone PLEASE help?

I just read danbong's response and I agree.

Not to say you should be aiming for her chest - the point of sparring isn't to beat your opponent to a pulp or severely injure them. But sparring requires contact and nothing is perfect. You receive pain or discomfort.

In general, I don't think males and females should be sparring anyways. I don't think any novice male should ever spar against a female that is better them him, most especially.

Posted
In general, I don't think males and females should be sparring anyways. I don't think any novice male should ever spar against a female that is better them him, most especially.

The only problem that I have with this concept is that females are more likely to be attacked by bigger, stronger males. By holding back too much with them in training, you do them a disservice. I am not saying that they should be mauled, either. However, they need to experience what it is like to deal with greater strength and speed at times.

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