need some self defense ideas

[little kicker]

ok well i need a ma point of view here.a man in my life tends to get out of control a lot (violently)and tends to push and hit me around and my mother.he's quite a big bloke but then again im a ma fighter i should defend myself and my mother.thing is he just grabs my wrist stopping any punches and pushes my to the ground.he holds me at arms length with brute strength so kicks are outta range.even though im suppposed to deal with things like this he always wins.my minds tends to go so blank thoguh i cant think right go for arm bar like in a match.

any advice would help a lot.

thanks

[cross]

ok well i need a ma point of view here.a man in my life tends to get out of control a lot (violently)and tends to push and hit me around and my mother.he's quite a big bloke but then again im a ma fighter i should defend myself and my mother.thing is he just grabs my wrist stopping any punches and pushes my to the ground.he holds me at arms length with brute strength so kicks are outta range.even though im suppposed to deal with things like this he always wins.my minds tends to go so blank thoguh i cant think right go for arm bar like in a match.

any advice would help a lot.

thanks

The best advice i can give is call the cops. Anyone trying to tell you otherwise is setting you up to get hurt again and again. There is only so much that you can do in terms of self defence. The best one is remove yourself from the situation, unless you can think of a way of doing that other than involving the police then thats your smartest option.

[cross]

though im suppposed to deal with things like this he always wins.my minds tends to go so blank thoguh i cant think right go for arm bar like in a match.

The dreaded adrenaline dump. Something most martial arts training doesnt prepare you for. The answer doesnt lie in working harder on technique or use this technique when he does that. He is obviously physically larger and stronger than you, what happens if you do pull off an "arm bar" will it stop him from attacking you in future, maybe. Will it make him angry and want to attack you more until it spirals out of control. maybe.

[bushido_man96]

Get yourself and your mother out of that situation. If your mother is unwilling to get herself out at your request, then get out yourself. Things like this go on and on, and begin to escalate. If he is holding you like that one day, he may be striking you the next. The best thing you can do is get yourself far away from him.

Call the police, and report him, even if it is against your mother's will. Believe me, you would rather have her mad at you than have her in ICU, or worse.

Don't be an enabler. Get away, and get safe. Don't think twice about fighting him.

[cross]

Get yourself and your mother out of that situation. If your mother is unwilling to get herself out at your request, then get out yourself. Things like this go on and on, and begin to escalate. If he is holding you like that one day, he may be striking you the next. The best thing you can do is get yourself far away from him.

Call the police, and report him, even if it is against your mother's will. Believe me, you would rather have her mad at you than have her in ICU, or worse.

Don't be an enabler. Get away, and get safe. Don't think twice about fighting him.

Thats solid advice.

[lordtariel]

Get yourself and your mother out of that situation. If your mother is unwilling to get herself out at your request, then get out yourself. Things like this go on and on, and begin to escalate. If he is holding you like that one day, he may be striking you the next. The best thing you can do is get yourself far away from him.

Call the police, and report him, even if it is against your mother's will. Believe me, you would rather have her mad at you than have her in ICU, or worse.

Don't be an enabler. Get away, and get safe. Don't think twice about fighting him.

That's really the only thing you can do. You might even consider getting a restraining order. That way the cops will haul him off, even if your mother is unwilling to report it.

[Havoc88]

That´s a pretty bad situation you have there man, I´m sorry to hear it

As written already, I advice you to go to the cops asap. You shouldn´t see that as a sigh of weakness from your side or anything nor that you are not capable enough as a martial artist. The way I see it, it is your ´job´ to make sure you and your mother are safe. In my opinion, and that of many others, you can finish that job best by going to the cops. They have experience with this kind of situations.

I would like to point out the thing BM said before me again, because it really hits the nail right on the top.

Call the police, and report him, even if it is against your mother's will. Believe me, you would rather have her mad at you than have her in ICU, or worse.

Good luck.

Tom

[username8517]

Get yourself and your mother out of that situation. If your mother is unwilling to get herself out at your request, then get out yourself. Things like this go on and on, and begin to escalate. If he is holding you like that one day, he may be striking you the next. The best thing you can do is get yourself far away from him.

Call the police, and report him, even if it is against your mother's will. Believe me, you would rather have her mad at you than have her in ICU, or worse.

Don't be an enabler. Get away, and get safe. Don't think twice about fighting him.

Ditto

[pegasi]

Like the others say, I wouldn't suggest trying to fight someone that much more physically imposing, just get away. If you haven't been taught them, ask your instructor about the breakaways you can use if someone grabs you by the arm, shirt, etc, or pushes you.

We regularly train how to get away from someone who's grabbed you by the arm, clothing, hair etc. The focus is on getting away, and if you happen to be able to incapacitate your attacker in some way in the process, that's great, but not essential. The trick to making breakaways work is to react the moment you feel contact. If you let the aggressor get a firm grip, it gets harder to get loose.

My regular partner in class is a guy a lot bigger than me, he's like 5'10"-6', where I'm only 5'4". He makes me work to get away, and sometimes I come away from class sore and sometimes a bruise or two. I'd rather that, than not know how to get someone to let go of me.

[stejitsu]

One of our best self defense reactions is to have our 'wits' about us. I have to agree whole heartedly about all the comments, already made. You need to break this cycle of abuse, its not healthy and you shouldn't have to put up with this any longer. On a note of techniques you could have in your arsenal if things could possably get worse are

scratching eyes/thumbs in eyes, no form just get yr fingers stuck in

squeezing mens groin are as hard as you can

stamping down shins/kicking shins

groin kicks

knee kicks to groin

slap to groin

football kick to groin

These are show stoppers OR could give you that vital second to escape. That 1 second maybe all the chance you have, take it and exit.