Important Question

[Chris05]

I am going to a highschool dance this week and it takes me a while to build up confidence to ask a girl to dance, but when i finally dance with a nice looking girl i get nervous and never follow through with my expectation(getting her number). and then i am really upset at myself for a while for giving up a perfect oppurtunity to get with a girl.

if you guys have any suggestion that can help me i would appreciate it.

[Orion]

take it from a man that knows, it happens to the best of us. In my youth and when I was free and single (which was about 9 years ago). It is the hardest thing to ask a girl to dance, even worse for me as I can't dance. If you don't ask then someone else will the worst thing she can say is no. Then just ask someone else. Girls (I think) find it cute that your nervous however they don't want to be the only one standing on the side without a partner.

[lordtariel]

I agree. High school can be tough. Just be confident in yourself and do it. Confident doesn't necessarily mean agressive, just self-assured. She might say yes or she might say no, but she's far more likely to say yes if you ask her than if you don't. As for getting her number... nothing says you have to do it at the dance. You could talk to her the day after and say you really had fun and wanted to know if you could do something again. If she says no, there's no real point in forcing the issue. You're young, there's plenty of time for relationships.(Geez that statment makes me feel old...)

[cathal]

I agree with lordtariel, displaying confidence is the key. Even if you don't feel it necessarily, you can definitely put on a show. The big thing is to relax and enjoy yourself, after all it's the whole reason you're there.

[bushido_man96]

All good points here. The worst they can do is tell you no. I wish I would have been bolder when I was younger, but I was always afraid of rejection. But, it happens to us all at some point, so we should not run from it. Best of luck, and just let it come to you.

[Chris05]

"nothing says you have to do it at the dance. You could talk to her the day after and say you really had fun and wanted to know if you could do something again"

i am attending this dance at a different school then mine so this will be the first time i see these girls i dont know if i will see them the next day if i wait toask the question.

[Syphax]

"nothing says you have to do it at the dance. You could talk to her the day after and say you really had fun and wanted to know if you could do something again"

i am attending this dance at a different school then mine so this will be the first time i see these girls i dont know if i will see them the next day if i wait toask the question.

If you won't see any of these girls after the dance, why would you be looking for one of their numbers? Why not look for a local girl?

[KarateK]

Best best best way to ask for a girls number is very cliche. I cannot say how it feels to have a guy who is trying to make you laugh and is being attentive - not sleazy. Nerves only make us realise how much you actually want to ask for our number. If a guy is too slick and practised we are put off by this and immediately on our guard. My advice is just to go for it - you don't need to practise lines. Try not to work youself up before hand - dance with lots of girls, and dont go towards each one expecting to ask for their number. Go to have fun and the rest will come naturally.

[Jeet Kune Do]

I am going to a highschool dance this week and it takes me a while to build up confidence to ask a girl to dance, but when i finally dance with a nice looking girl i get nervous and never follow through with my expectation(getting her number). and then i am really upset at myself for a while for giving up a perfect oppurtunity to get with a girl.

if you guys have any suggestion that can help me i would appreciate it.

Dont mean to be nasty, but I got 3 numbers without asking, I also wouldnt have expected them, oh well, I only talk to one on MSN now

dont worry buddy, I am sure you will one day find the courage, just say to yourself ;"just do it and it will be over soon".....

[Kieran-Lilith]

As a teenage girl, I can say I would probably give my number to a guy if he asked. Depends, though. If you're a guy from my school, who I've known for years and still don't like, the probability is very small. But other guys aren't bad. Well, at least, not all the time. The only conclusion I've ever reached about guys is that they're dumb. They completely miss it when we want them to ask for our number.

Oh, and if you do ask the girl to dance, hang out with her for a while afterwards, or that would be very akward. You want to at least have an idea if the person you want to go out with enjoys the same sort of things, etc, and girls don't really like it when guys make them feel akward. We like feeling like we're in charge, even if we aren't.