Convincing the wife.

[Azmyth]

Hey, its been a while since I posted here. Its also been a while since I have thought about martial arts at all in months. Life can throw all sorts of interesting things your way that usually hinder you from doing things you'd like to do. I was taking Tae Kwon Do from my local center, starting at like age 15. I did it for about a year, made it to green belt and like most kids.. got interested in other things (girls, video games). Later on, I was about 22.. married and working. I gave it another shot. Went for about 6 months and then tragedy struck.. I lost my job and everything just went south. Now, we have things back in order.. but we just bought a new car and a brand new bedroom suite. Things are well, but I just don't think my wife is going to let me add another bill to our roster for TKD. I am 25 now, and I want to get my black belt before I am an old man. I'm about 3 belts away at this point, and I want to take it further than that.. but thats my initial goal. How can I convince her? I know we have the money.. its just making her see. She thinks I get everything and she never gets to do anything exciting.. so that has alot to do with it.

[Aodhan]

How can I convince her? I know we have the money.. its just making her see. She thinks I get everything and she never gets to do anything exciting.. so that has alot to do with it.

Take her with you, and see if they have discounts for multiple family members?

either get her interested in MA as well, or work out a compromise. Maybe there's a reason she says she never gets to do anything?

Aodhan

[Azmyth]

See.. I have done tons of stuff... because I am just really active and go after the things I want. I've done martial arts, been in bands, was a professional wrestler, and now pursuing acting. she takes piano lessons, but I had to kind of push her into doing that. She doesn't really have any dreams or aspirations other than having a family.

[Aodhan]

See.. I have done tons of stuff... because I am just really active and go after the things I want. I've done martial arts, been in bands, was a professional wrestler, and now pursuing acting. she takes piano lessons, but I had to kind of push her into doing that. She doesn't really have any dreams or aspirations other than having a family.

Well, it really sounds like you guys need to just sit down and talk. Find out what she wants to do that your other activities would cut into, and if she has anything she really wants to do (Other than pushing her into piano lessons.) I find it hard to believe that her ONLY goal in life is to be a mom.

And if it is, great, you just need to work out when.

Aodhan

[bushido_man96]

Setting down and discussing it with her would be great, and it would be better if she would do it with you.

Explain to her the pros and cons of MA training, and what your plans are. Maybe if she see what you would like to do, it would convince her.

[Azmyth]

well I'd love for her to do it with me.. and I even have tried. One of her reasons is having to start over with me already being halfway through the belts, she wanted us to be on the same level. I tried to explain that this doesn't matter. The other reason is because she is really shy and does not really like the idea of yelling in front of people, or having to spar strange males.

[hapkido princess]

I also agree with sitting down and talking about it. Also Taking her with you to a class is a great idea. I was also VERY shy about "yelling" and fighting with other people. Hapkido has helped me over come that. Now I grapple with whom ever my instructor puts me up against. Not every one at my school "yells" some people just do small key ups with breathing. I had a simular problem with my husband. he wanted me to quit because it took up to much time. We had numerous conversations about this. once he saw how important it was to me he now helps me. I'm TERRIBLE at kicks and he holds targets for me ever night, he learned what to watch for. So he's kinda like my coach. Our son is in JR. Hapkido and has been for about 8 months. I'm up to my blue belt red stripe and I owe a lot of that to my husband. So even if she doesn't want to join maybe she could help you at home. Everyone needs an outlet or hobby, she must have something she's always wanted to do.

[Zorbasan]

If it is one of your goals you shouldnt really have to convince her tho, she should support you cos its what you want to do. providing you have the money to do it and its not going to stretch the budget at all.

[Azmyth]

I talked to her yesterday and she's agreed to let me do it if nothing else, once she has a job secured. (She has one, but they just got bought out by a company and she won't have one come January). She said she might do it with me. I know the instryctor very well, and I can always make sure she is not put against the bullies or the heavy hitters. She had a bad experience when she took it before where the males would kind of be very rough with the female students. They don't want to do that while I am present, or things could get very ugly.

[bushido_man96]

I talked to her yesterday and she's agreed to let me do it if nothing else, once she has a job secured. (She has one, but they just got bought out by a company and she won't have one come January). She said she might do it with me. I know the instryctor very well, and I can always make sure she is not put against the bullies or the heavy hitters. She had a bad experience when she took it before where the males would kind of be very rough with the female students. They don't want to do that while I am present, or things could get very ugly.

Good for you! Hope it all works out well for the both of you.