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Hey all. A little help needed


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Thanks dude. Yes, JJ is still there. I love JJ. But my instructor is taking time to finish the season (he teaches snowboarding, also) before we start again. I can't wait. I'm just waiting on the word from him.

Laurie F

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I know how you feel about losing motivation. I LOVED my karate training, and then fell ill was off for a few weeks, then had to go away on an archaeological dig for Uni and was away for a few more weeks because of that, then went to visit a friend and so missed a few more weeks. Before I knew it, I hadn't trained for a couple of months and I just couldn't fire myself up to go back. I found the longer I left it, the harder it was for me to go back. I was partly nervous about going back in case I'd forgotten more than I'd ever learned, and I partly could never be bothered when training night rolled around. I hardly trained at all in 2 years, but when I got back into it, I really regretted missing out on so much training time.

However, I still always felt excitement when I thought about martial arts, and wished I had the guts to go back, and from what you say this doesn't sound quite the same with you. Maybe you've just reached a plateau and its something you either have to work through, or time when you throw in the towel. I've noticed at my dojo that most people seem to start to 'get stuck in a rut' around about your stage. I've noticed that a lot of people get to 2nd Kyu or 1st Kyu and drop out. There's some that hang around and get their Shodan, train for a while after that and then drop out. I think that most people just reach a stage of their training at this point where they begin to feel that they either can't learn much more, or can't learn much more quick enough. I don't think its just martial artists that experience this either. With many skills, people who start out on the journey, whether that be learning the piano or doing martial arts, are likely to drop out either when they start to meet hurdles in the beginning, or when the reach the half way or three-quarters way point in their development when they realise that from this moment in, they are going to have to work their butt off for even slight improvement, and things are getting really serious. Maybe you are realising that you are getting to this stage in your training and the thought of it is overwhelming you and making you lose motivation.

As for the dojo cleaning thing, I think if your Sensei teaches you for free or for a very small sum of money, then it is only right and decent that you do some cleaning. My family and I are very involved in doing a lot of voluntary work through our church and 9 times out of 10 we are the ones left with all the cleaning up in our hands at the end of the day. People like to be involved in something that you've organised if its fun for them, but the minute its over, they disappear, most of the time not giving a thought to all the work left to be done. It can get a tad annoying when you've already put out a lot of time and effort on people for them to just leave you with the mop and bucket tidying up after them as well. However, in my opinion, if this is a commercial dojo, where your Sensei charges people significant amounts of money in order to teach them, then he should be the one arranging the cleaning, or doing it himself if need be.

I think if he's charging you a money for teaching you and expecting you to clean up HIS premises for him, then he's being a tad cheeky, and if that's a requirement for rank, then you should probably look elsewhere for tuition.

I think you should try out some new places, train there and see how you feel in a few months. If you still feel that your love of the martial arts is gone, then I think you really need to just sit down and decide whether you want to work through your 'slump' even though that might mean forcing yourself to train for months or even years while not enjoying it, but then hopefully coming out the other end one day and being glad you stuck in, or just throwing in the towel with your martial arts.

Smile. It makes people wonder what you've been up to.

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We all have opinions and everyone goes through what you are. When we have a long break, I too sometimes think I enjoy the rest, catching up on reading etc... Then when i go back, I think "this is way too fun to allow myself to slack off." I think your real issue is the dojang itself. You are having second thoughts about stuff going on there. Give it some thought, but maybe finding another school or another completely different style might be what you are looking for.

A great martial artist is one who is humble and respectful of others.

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You are paying him to teach you Tae Kwon Do, not paying him for the priviledge to clean his dojang.

You said it much better than I did!

I personally think that with your previous experience and your current knowledge that you are at the level of black. You have been invited to test. I think you are ready or could be ready in a short period of time. So here's an idea.....

Option 1. Find a TKD instructor that would test you based on your skill and technique and not on politics or organizational mumbo jumbo. (If anyone knows an independent in her area, pass the name to her. Better yet, if you are someone who could do it get in touch with her. We know she's been training for a while and had switched systems.)

Option 2. Talk to your last instructor and be honest. Tell him your goals and go from there.

After thinking about your situation, I would like to see you explore #1 and at least get that on your resume. Maybe knowing that it's for real would give you the spark to bust your behind and start training. After that you could lay low and do your JJ/snowboarding thing.

Just my thoughts. What do you think?

I had to lose my mind to come to my senses.

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i went through a big slump with hwa rang do, which i got out of by playing capoeira. it was different enough that it was like starting over, but similar enough that there was stuff to take back to hwa rang do and apply. that said, i've since quit hwa rang do, as that passion never fully rekindled, and politics got in the way. but i'd advise you to train in something totally different and see if nothing comes back. worst case scenario is you come back here in 10 years and post "guys, i used to be really into the martial arts, but i got bored and quit, but lately it's really been interesting me and i want to get back in"... which really isn't so bad. better than dragging your feet through something you don't want to do and resenting it the rest of your days. just so long as you don't ask if you're to old to jump back in.... :wink:

"I hear you can kill 200 men and play a mean six string at the same time..."-Six String Samurai

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If you really aren't enjoying your MA anymore, give it a break. Do something you do love, and if you start to miss the dojo, go back and see if you can get back into it. Sometimes things come into our lives to make us better, but as we grow, we grow out of those things that made us grow and become better in the first place, and we grow into something else.

The cleaning thing...as a belt requirement, that's a little odd. As a common courtesy...that's normal. At my own school, we aren't required to clean for our rank. We are, however, required to clean as the adult class students. It doesn't bother most of us. Sensei gives us so much for such little money, we're all more than happy to clean, and with four or five of us cleaning some nights, it gets done fast.

I would think you could talk to your instructor and ask for other ways to give back to the dojo. I've made poster boards and things like that for my instructor before about tournaments and the like. It doesn't require much more than a half hour and some sort of artsy-color-matching skills.

I wish you the best outcome possible in this, whatever that may be.

He who gains a victory over other men is strong; but he who gains a victory over himself is all powerful Lao-tsu

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I don't know if changing is the ultimate answer, but I also don't know how you feel. Here is why I say this: I have trained for many years, I too have felt this lull. You just have to keep going. And either it is going to come back or not. If it does not come back where you are at, then how is it going to come back in another school. It maybe fun at first, but what happens when it gets boring there :-? Remember: the difference between a white belt and a black belt is the black belt never quit :karate:

In my school, cleaning up is all the doshi reasponsiblity. You use it, you clean it. You drop it, you pick it up. You sweat on it, you wipe it with the clorox wipes. That's that. However, making it a requirment for your belt. I don't know about that.

"Train HARD to be HARD"

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Hey all,

I want to thank you all for your help. I do have another question, tho. I'm starting to get the "itch" to train again. But I am a little reluctant about this school. Maybe I should just go back and train only ... no comps or cleaning, or politics. I'll just train, and explain to my instructor that is all I want. What should I say to him (other than just that)?

Or should I go elsewhere? It would be cheaper, for one.

Laurie F

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