Girlfriend says Karate is taking over my life!

[Bluetulipx]

I do not have a significant other, but I have found the same type of issues with family and friends. Indeed, I lost some friends because of my change of interests.

To change from going down the pub for a drink to exercising frequently is one of the most drastic changes that people can make (in my opinion anyway).

If some of your quality time with your girlfriend was down the pub and you no longer have that then it is understandable that the 'other' person is going to resent it (whoever they maybe).

Perhaps things will even out once your girlfriend starts her 20 hours of study.

I try to limit the amount that I talk about the martial arts to non-MA people and spend more time chatting to people at the clubs that I attend. However, I am lucky being single because I can spend my time doing anything I want!

[Brandon Fisher]

I say its truly a lack of understanding of the martial arts. Of course her Judo experience would most likely be alot different then what she would experience in Shotokan. But sounds like she is just not into taking care of herself.

[Jacob]

Although I am not sure if this applies to your particular situation, some people will try to dissuade others who are doing good things for themselves and becoming happier and more self-reliant. It may stem from insecurity, jealousy, or the other person just doesn't have the same mindset as you.

I'm not saying your girlfriend is a bad person, but it seems like you are doing well and she may be in some kind of a holding pattern. Why not suggest that she do something she likes in the way of a hobby or activity that would take place at the same time you are doing karate? That way you each get your "alone time."

[Brandon Fisher]

Thats a good suggestion

[disarm]

I think as a couple we need to find something else to do together, that doesn't involve sitting in the pub or watching mindless TV. A few years ago she used to go Aerobics a few times a week but dropped out when friends dropped out (had to rely on their transport at the time). I think she just needs a bit of motivation and inspiration.

A couple of weeks ago she expressed an interest in a local running club and was going to make some enquires. I said at the time I would be interested in joining with her, as I think it would be good to do a bit of running during the week inbetween training days.

I think I'll remind her, that could be beneficial to both of us I reckon.

[disarm]

She has her own hobbies too (she makes jewrellery and cards etc) and goes out with her friends, etc. Also we don't live together (thankfully!) allthough she keeps asking me to, and saying that I am more comitted to MA than she is!

Hell, its not like I've moved into the dojo.

Damn, now it really sounds like a rant:(

[Brandon Fisher]

I am surprised she hasn't gone looking for someone else yet if it is this bad.

[ravenzoom]

Maybe she has!!

[ravenzoom]

Maybe she has!!

[jaymac]

I am in the same boat. I continue to train anyways. I do not want to sit at home and do nothing. I have asked "what would you like to do?" There was an interest in yoga, but when I suggested we go together, I got a "No" instead. I am not giving up making my life better because my spouse wants a couch potato partner.