Ultimatum, join or leave?

[RichardHangHong]

I spoke with my senior students last night about what had happened with the instructor and they, like me, didn't like it just one bit.

I've made my decision and next week I'll be speaking with the instructor at class and will have 3 main things to say.

1) I'm happy to/I'd like to join as an individual in order to continue my training with the instructor and will retest my nidan grade with them in their system if it is required of me to do so. I am also doing this with the other style that I train in and will be retesting my nidan at some point too (I told the other instructor about the situation with this club and he felt just as offended as I did and thinks its all about money).

2) Under no cicumstances am I going to bring my entire club over to just their style, it is not fair on the students or me to put me in that situation in the first place, especially after everything we've put into creating/building the club over the last year. Another big change like that would see the club disappear. If the students want to train in their style seperately, they can do so if they choose to, not to be forced to.

3) I was quite offended by the insults that the assistant chief instructor made towards me and what I'm doing. The comments were unfounded and uncalled for.

I'm going to think about and plan exactly how I'm going to say all of this as I don't want to offend the instructor, although if I offend the ACI I really couldn't care less as they have never given me any reason to respect them for anything other than their karate skills. On a personal level, the ACI certainly won't make my xmas card list.

Thank you everyone for your points of view, they have certainly helped me in understanding the other club's point of view and in making my decision.

RichardGregory

[kreza]

Good luck.

[RichardHangHong]

Just thought I'd let you all know how it went last night.

Well, I spoke with the instructor after class and told them that none of my students wanted to change over to their association. I respectfully mentioned that I thought the comments by the ACI were unfounded and uncalled for and that I was happy to join as an individual and retake my dan gradings if necessary. We spoke a little about his reaction towards our non-black belts who teach and he understood my situation that most of them had been teaching for between 1-4years so I could not take that away from them.

After a long discussion I found out that his main concern was that the knowledge wouldn't be passed on correctly, considering that their lineage to the founder is VERY short and therefore the most accurate. He assured me that none of it was about money, just about knowledge and he is happy to let me continue to train provided I am actively encouraging my students to attend his open seminars so that they get even more correct tuition in their style, I have been doing this anyway and am always edifying him to my students whenever I show them things I have picked up from his classes. I said I would also start adding their open courses to our club calendar and he was fine with that. He finished off by saying that he respected me for coming back to his dojo (in his words) "considering I took quite a pasting the other week" and is happy to let me stay and train with him regularly.

Thank you everyone for your advice, it helped a lot. It's amazing how things can be so easily misunderstood. I'm glad I sat down with the instructor last night and just talked it out. It would've been a real shame if it had gone the other way.

Regards

RG

[powerof0ne]

I'm glad that it worked out for you, so well and that it had nothing to do with money.

Keep us posted every once in a while if things are still going good or bad because this is an interesting situation. The closest way I was ever in something like this was a few years ago I had a group of Muay Thai students that I tried to merge with a more knowledgable Muay Thai, Kickboxing, and Knockdown karate master. He wanted to be looked upon as the "main guy" is what he told me which I had no problem with because I wasn't used to being an instructor yet, and like I said this individual has years of experience on me.

Anyhoo, to make a long story short he wasn't dependable on showing up to teach and had a pain pill addiction. It's really sad because this individual has a wealth of knowledge but has too many personal problems. I even thought I became his friend, trained with him privately, worked with him outside martial arts in a business that was just being started...Then, when I went to St. Louis for a few months on work and had him watch my car, my car stereo is supposodely "stolen" and so is his, supposodely. Funny thing is, is that his car stereo is maybe worth $5 on the street and after I come back and get my car I find out he's talking behind my back.

It's really sad because this was someone I really wanted to learn from, I hate all this drama in the martial arts.

[Fairfax_Uechi]

Just thought I'd let you all know how it went last night.

Well, I spoke with the instructor after class and told them that none of my students wanted to change over to their association. I respectfully mentioned that I thought the comments by the ACI were unfounded and uncalled for and that I was happy to join as an individual and retake my dan gradings if necessary. We spoke a little about his reaction towards our non-black belts who teach and he understood my situation that most of them had been teaching for between 1-4years so I could not take that away from them.

After a long discussion I found out that his main concern was that the knowledge wouldn't be passed on correctly, considering that their lineage to the founder is VERY short and therefore the most accurate. He assured me that none of it was about money, just about knowledge and he is happy to let me continue to train provided I am actively encouraging my students to attend his open seminars so that they get even more correct tuition in their style, I have been doing this anyway and am always edifying him to my students whenever I show them things I have picked up from his classes. I said I would also start adding their open courses to our club calendar and he was fine with that. He finished off by saying that he respected me for coming back to his dojo (in his words) "considering I took quite a pasting the other week" and is happy to let me stay and train with him regularly.

Thank you everyone for your advice, it helped a lot. It's amazing how things can be so easily misunderstood. I'm glad I sat down with the instructor last night and just talked it out. It would've been a real shame if it had gone the other way.

Regards

RG

Glad to hear that it worked out for you. I think your situation shows that if you take your time and reason things through that things can work out well. Imagine if you would have flew off and told them off? The outcome woud have been very different. IMHO, the way you handled things is exactly how a martial artist should go about things. Stay calm, hear the other person out, take your time and think things through, treat the other person with respect, and stand up for your beliefs. Use your training as part of your life and benefit from all of your hard work. To me it seems that you students are very lucky to have a great teacher, and keep up the good work. And congrats!