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Losing the Love


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This post was originally published as an article in a dedicated KarateForums.com Articles section, which is no longer online. After the section was closed, this article was most to the most appropriate forum in our community.

It’s a proud moment: cameras flashing, parents and friends beaming, your heart pounding as your Sensei or instructor presents you with a new belt for the first time. You’ve just completed your first grading and you’re on top of the world. The martial arts have never seemed so amazing as they do at this moment. Perhaps you never thought you’d ever be able to kick like that or move your body that way. The confidence that has built up has completely changed you for the better. Yes, you feel wonderful all over. There is no way you can picture life without your martial arts classes, whatever type they may be. What happens, however, when the thrill actually begins to fade and going to class slowly turns into a chore rather than the event you count down to every other day?

This is something no one wants to experience and yet everyone, at some point, does. The moment that you actually feel your body resisting getting up off the couch or computer, packing your things and then heading for the door, rather than that pang of excitement that used to bounce happily in the pit of your stomach, can be a depressing one. You might wonder what is wrong with you or what is wrong with your dojo that has caused the magic to fade. You try to find a rational explanation for your disillusion with your formerly favorite activity and perhaps you do find one. The problem could, indeed, be with your dojo or dojang. If you find that you’ve, by accident, selected a “McDojo” for your martial arts training, you will realize (hopefully immediately) that the instruction there is not beneficial to you and that will press you into searching for a new and better place. If there is nothing wrong that you can see or feel with the place of instruction, then you may need to look deeper to find the real reason behind it.

If you’re a Gemini, like me, then you probably already know that we have a reputation for becoming bored with things quite quickly and easily. Now, I am not saying that we should all go by our Zodiac signs to discern what we should be feeling or how we should be acting, but it does have to do with one’s personality, which profoundly affects everything one says and does.

Maybe you are someone who must have something constantly new around, and cannot stand practicing the same movements and techniques over and over again. There is also the possibility that you have reached a sort of standstill because of where you are with respect to your belt level (ever heard of the “blue belt blues?”). I must admit, at this point in my martial arts training, although I received my blue advanced belt two days ago, I noticed that I was definitely not as nervous during the grading as I used to be. Even though blue advanced is getting to be up there with the higher belts and, at this point, I’d say it would be considered to be normal for the excitement to fade, it still kind of concerned me that I didn’t feel the same sort of pride and care for the achievement that I used to at lower belt levels.

Instead of thrilled, I was exhausted, and just wanted things to be over. This deeply saddened me. I decided, however, that this must be a phase. No matter how many assignments or readings I get, no matter the personal problems I have, I truly do love what I do at the dojo, and now that I know how amazing it is for one’s body, no other workout will ever suffice again. Just think of how great you feel after a particularly intense class. That should be incentive enough to help you drag yourself from the computer screen for a couple of hours.

When trying to determine the cause for a drop in enthusiasm, one must take into consideration any other responsibilities or activities that take up time in one’s life as well. That could definitely be affecting the way you perform on the dojang floor. Any events or issues that are occurring at the present time in your life, like a huge upcoming exam or the worry of finding a job, can easily invade your mind and swish around right when you are trying to remember the moves of a kata or are in the middle of sparring. This can seriously impair your technique, your mental state and your love and interest for the martial art you practice. The key, I believe, to making sure you can keep everything in check is to prioritize all responsibilities. This is certainly easier said than done, take it from me. However, if you are able to do this and set aside some time for some good ‘ol martial arts training, you’ll be able to stay sane, regardless of what may be happening outside the dojo.

Finally, there is, of course, the possibility that you are not interested in martial arts because... well, you just aren’t anymore. Maybe someone referred you to your dojang or told you to just try things out for a few months and you, having done all that, ultimately started feeling that this stuff, while incredibly interesting, is not for you. And that’s all right. Hey, not everything is made for everyone and at least you gave it a shot and are a bit more educated on what the martial arts really are about. Hopefully, if you are going through a dry spell at the moment, you will try to really discover why this is so before doing anything drastic. If you need a bit of encouragement, think of this as the calm before a storm. Nothing... nothing... then, everything.

Kool Kiais: ICE! DIE! KITES! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHH! KIAI!


"Know Thyself"


"Circumstances make me who I am."

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  • 2 months later...

Wow that is a great article it kinda made me sad,I absouloutly LOVE karate its the best thing in the whole entire world right now i'm a green belt but i cant wait to get my black belt,I'm proud of you for sticking to karate and not quiting.

Hi I'm Angela aka kicking queen 101 i am a green belt right now in Tea Kwon Do and i love it soooooooooooooooo much!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Great Article I'm glad that you didden't quit karate and you kept going even when you diddne't feel like going GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi I'm Angela aka kicking queen 101 i am a green belt right now in Tea Kwon Do and i love it soooooooooooooooo much!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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