How you cope with pain?

[Luigio]

Well, my friend recently died, and i'm trying to find ways to cope. Mainly, I play video games or write poems, or if nobody's home, I sit at my table and have a chat with him. Sometimes I also listen to music, or go hardcore bikeriding.

You guys/girls?

[Enviroman]

It's tough. I lost my brother two years ago (he was 19) to a sudden illness...I was lucky to have a great girlfriend and other friends...but it's just something you work through. It's hard to "give advice" as it's such a deeply personal issue. By witing your poems you are honoring your friend's life...truly a great deed.

[Kaminari]

Everybody deals with loss and grieves in their own way. Find out what helps you the most and do that, as what works for you might not for someone else. Maybe your poetry is your outlet. Continue to do that, as putting your feelings on paper is, for many people, a good outlet.

[kiba no chi]

yeah, exactly, and what was a good outlet for me when my father died was just wailing out on something, usualy i would do it on a wall or a door but theres two reasons why i dont recomend that

1) it causes damage the the wall or door that you have to pay for and

2) it can slice your hand open pretty good or get some bruises at the least, i had 12 stitches once >.<

so i would reccomend a punching bag, if you cant get one theres always a pillow, i did that a few times too

[Enviroman]

kiba,

i, unfortunately, had a similar reaction to my brother's death. i ended up putting a rather large hole in my apartment wall with my fist. i also ended up destroying a chair...it didn't make me feel better but it definitely caused me trouble later on.

a punching bag is probably better, indeed.

[aefibird]

Luigio, sorry to hear of your loss.

[karatekid1975]

When my father died, I just continued training (something he would have wanted me to do). I trained a bit more than I usually would. I also played video games (it sounds weird, but it worked). I was addicted to my gameboy for months. I did drink heavy for a few months (bad idea), but I found other "outlets" (playing on the computer, gardening, writing articles, ect). Now I just go about my daily life. My dad was never one of those that wanted to be the "center of attention," so I just don't make a big deal out of it. It's when I make a big "fuss" over him that it gets hard on me. So I just don't. Works for me, anyways.

[Goju_boi]

well when one of my best friends died people would just comfort me telling me that he's better there than here (because he had a very rare cancer).And I just accepted it because I know that theres a reason for everything in life and maybe that was just the way it had to be.

[ivette_green]

I went and trained the night I found out my grandmother died. It helped. We buried her body about three weeks ago. Yeah, I took to drinking a little more heavily the half-week before and after. Then I shook it off (the drinking) and went back to my normal routine.

[karatekid1975]

It's funny (well bad choice of a word), but I tested for 1st gup on the one year date from my dad's passing, and failed. I think it had something to do with it. It rained like mad like it did for his memorial. I happened to be outside cleaning (throwing broken boards away, ect) after the test and I was soaked (full dobok and all) .... I just had to share that. It's kind of depressing, but I was ok with it, though.