broken spirits

[Jkoko]

about four or five days ago the assistant instructor made me fight a person in are academy, I did not want fight that person but he made me. I already new in the back of my head this was going to be a realy tough fight, but i had to fight . i got beat plane and simple really bad, to the point that i ( it pains me to admit this) i went into the basement and cried. manly because i thought i was a really good fighter but i lost soooo badly. to the point that i have kinda been in excile for the past few days. i have basicly have been confused and don't know how to fight anymore.

i dont know if i should use form techniques alot,

2. use tournament style fighting techniques( punch and kick combos esd.)

3. or if i should get in there and use alot more grapple and traping.

this lose has made me so confused please someone reply to one of the above. or tell me what u do keep in mind my style is Tan Tui style kungfu. respond

PEACE

I know how you feel,well kinda,I though I was really good in grappling,I got the moves as soon as we were taught,but the instructor made a class match between me and a blue belt,I knew I was dead meat,but I didnt give up,oh,and this was also the same time I broke my arm in an armbar,I was relaxed but the guy just pulled too hard too fast and I just screamt at the top of my lungs ,that was so damn painfull,I felt like I wanna stomp him in the face