Defense against School Scuffles

[shogeri]

Basically you either stand up for yourself or you run away from (ie. avoid) the sitiation.

Choices and consequences...that's what life is about.

Get something out of them, regardless.

Learn and move on.

Focus on the positive things in life.

[Charlie]

There's lots of good, well-thought-out advice posted in this thread, but, much of it may appear to be conflicting. However, I don't believe that to really be the case, because the subject of dealing with bullying, harrassing, or aggressive behavior encompasses so many situations, environments, variables, and cultural norms and mores. What may work in one situation may not work in another. Perhaps if I can give some personal examples, it might help show what may have been more or less effective in one situation, but probably wouldn't have been in another.

In junior high, a group of kids were bullying me incessantly, to the point that whenever I saw them they would do something like throw something at me, push me, etc. I finally had enough and challenged the most aggressive of them to fight and we went where no adults would see us and then beat each other up fairly well. That being my first fight and having no martial arts or any kind of training, I took a lot of damage to my face, but no permanent damage. He took some damage too but I'd say I basically lost the fight. However, they never really bothered me again after that except for occasional taunts. In fact, I never really had to worry about them again after that. The teachers saw the damage to our faces when we showed up at school the next day, but didn't do anything about it beyond asking me if there was a problem that they needed to get involved with and I said no.

In high school my family moved to the Navajo reservation in Arizona. Frequently I was the target of pushes, foot stomps, and taunting. However, if I had decided to fight over it, I would have been in way over my head because I would have had to fight a good percentage of the school because I believe the bullying was due to racial animosity. I just ignored it and after awhile I was left more or less alone. One way I dealt with it was to have friends around me if someone I thought might want to give me some trouble was around.

Shortly after finishing basic training in the Army I was on a bus with other recent Army enlistees going to a different base to continue our training. Two of them who were sitting near me were harrassing me for several hours, saying what they would "do to me" when we got the next base and that I'd better watch myself, because they would be watching for me, etc. The bus stopped at a cafeteria for us to eat breakfast. After I got my food I saw that the two guys were sitting together with an empty seat next to them. Even though there were plenty of empty seats at other tables, I went sat down next to them. They looked surprised and said a few things to me, which I ignored, and then never said anything more to me after that. Whenever I saw them after that they just ignored me. If I had fought them I would have gotten in trouble with the military. If I had "told on them," I'm fairly sure I would have been told to deal with it myself if no actual violence was going on. I guess finding a way to "stand up" to them without using violence worked in that situation.

"Judo" throws, as mentioned previously, may also be an effective response to physical bullying, because it is a tough, but non-striking method of dealing with the situation. An acquaintance of mine told me about how he was physically harrassed in high school by group of students. In his case, he had some karate and judo training. One day he decided he'd had enough and when he noticed one of the bullys approaching to push him from behind, he executed an over-the-shoulder throw on the guy (is that called "ippon seoi nage" or something like that?). The guy landed hard, got-up and threatened him with retaliation, but he and his buddies never bothered my acquaintance again.

I guess my point is different things may work for different situations. If we're careful not to act too quickly or impulsively, we can probably find an effective resolution. Like Master Kano said, "Consider fully, act decisively."

[TaeKwonDo Afficianado]

I agree with justice zero almost totally.

Nonsensical zero tolerance policies... exactly.

I was bullied in school sometimes, even though I'm a big buy because I didn't really want to fight. Not even real bullying all the time, sometimes just verbal assault. I honestly don't really care that much... but I refuse to accept B.S. like that day in and day out, like every single class and between every single class, so I eventually taught a lesson physically.

And I did try talking to teachers, etc. One teacher did help me out one time when I was getting crap from some kid for no reason. However, later in the day of course" poor baby needs help... blah blah blah".

It never worked. They are amused... they want an easy target, and telling a teacher 98.7 percent of the time will do nothing.

Once in a while you have to fight fire with fire, because air is only adding fuel to the fight. Hit em hard once if you get a good chance, and hopefully that will be the end of it.

Thats pretty much how it worked for me, one punch and most of it stopped.

I don't want you to get in trouble though and I wish you luck. It's not an easy situation.

All the best,

Tom

[TheAnimal]

Well, IF you can get away with it, punch the guy in the nose, twice, and if need be follow up with a shot to the jaw to knock him out. If it was just you and him, he started it, you defended yourself. If your friends are around, they can back you up in your story. Woohoo!

[Jp656]

Those fights i start, But when someone helps me i turn on them, I dont like exepting help, I cant stand team sparring

[MizuRyu]

Back down when you can, when you can't, brace yourself. I found that what little BJJ I took helps me a LOT in school scuffles.. take them to the ground, lock em, and wait for an authority figure to take care of the rest. Striking is usually a bad idea... It can get you in a LOT more trouble...

[bushido_man96]

If there is a noticable leader that steps up, I would say take him out quick. Knock his lights out. Overwhelm him as quick as you can.

If I could go back to school, I would want to go to detention a few times, I think.

[freebird534]

id say just dont do anything, cuz pushing is ridiculous. even bruce lee said "pushing is a poor example of force". i guess if u really wanted to not get pushed, then tap theyre hands away.

[lordtariel]

Just twist your torso sideways and the push will slip right off. Try to grab their hand closest to your body as you twist. Now you have someone with locked or almost locked arms standing at a 90 degree angle from you where you have control of their wrist and your other hand is almost resting near their elbow... oh the possibilities...

[Samuel]

I'd come close to agreeing with "Running and telling the teacher", The less you do the better.

Dont really want to dabble in school exclusions and the such, you dont want to interfear with your education really.

Though, In the last fight I was in, I was pined up against a wall by two lads, while another lad threw punches at my temple, I wasnt suprised when all the injury I got was a red mark and a blood shot eye (such weak and poor technique he had) But when your pinned to the wall theres not much you can do apart from kneeing one in a stomach, socking the other in the head and making a hasty departure.

Heh someone was even so kind enough to hand me my glasses as they fell off when i took the blows to the head.

But like I said, I'd keep with doing the least damage you can, I got excluded for the day because of that incident, since I was in the wrong for doing the most damage you see?.

Shouting alot and making yourself the dominant figure, that works most of the time, If they think your a "psyco" or "well weird innit" theres less chance they will actually throw a punch, Just like the same group of lads tryed ganging up on my and my friends after coming out of the gym, I just let out a loud roar and screamed alittle, they soon dipped their head and went their merry way to drink cider no doubt.