Ah, help!

[KarateChick06]

I like his guy at my dojo, but he's my head and favorite sensei's son. Not a good mix. How do I stop liking him? Haha!

[taiji fajin]

Don't deal with him right after class. During a workout, your body releases chemicals to make you feel good. If you are with someone right at the tail end and after working out, you subconsciously attribute these good feelings to himm / her, and begin liking them. Find some other hot guy in the class and start talking to him at the end / after class, and who you like will change soon enough .

(yeah, sometimes I take a too biological / technical approach to feelings and cut out all the romance. Sometimes.)

[elila]

Get a crush on someone else outside of the dojo- then you can get your mind off him. You'll also do better in class if you're not focusing on him.

[RaidenTB]

I'd say go for it. But outside the dojo.

[Patrick]

There were a few posts that we removed in error. They are below. I apologize for the confusion.

Whoooaaa.... really? That's cool! I didn't know that! I mean, I guess I knew exercising makes you feel happy, but I didn't know it made you feel that happy. Thanks for the advice! *goes to find somebody else to talk to*

haha, yeah, no problem. And yes, I know I'm a bio geek

wow so does that mean if i keep talking to the pretty chicks at the end of my class then they will start liking me?....... looks like im going to be late home for dinner from now on

This isnt some love forums!

Joking..

I dont see whats so bad? go out with him.Its not like they are going to kick you out of the dojo.

[greenbelt_girl15]

What happens is that when you work out your body releases endorphins a.k.a. the feel good chemical so like tiaji fajin said if you're talking to that guy your subconsius attributes the good feelings to him/her.

No matter what your doing after a hard workout you will probably feel more cheerful about it.

[Chaz]

KILL HIM!!! Just kidding of course...

[jarrettmeyer]

Yeah - exercise, love & sex, chocolate - they all do the same thing. They ramp up endorphins and seratonin. (Of course, cocaine and exstasy do this too at a much higher level with much greater consequences.)

Endorphins are the bodies natural painkillers. Serotonins are the neural transmitters for the brain's pleasure center. Everything greenbelt_girl said is correct. And, if you do actually like the guy a little bit, that feeling will be amplified by the workout.

taiji fajin --- geeks rule!

[1985]

I'd say go for it. But outside the dojo.

i would like to second that.

dont let anything stand in the way for love

[Grenadier]

As long as you, and your mark, er, prospective friend, are both sensible people, then I see no problems with simply asking him out, as long as some common sense is applied:

1) Do not, under any circumstances, bring your relationship into the dojo. Both of you are there to train, and doing anything else other than training or instruction distracts both of you, and potentially anyone else in the dojo.

2) If you have a problem with each other, solve it outside of the dojo. A LOT of strife can be created if two people are arguing in front of everyone else in the dojo. Such events have even chased off other good students, or left bad images in people's minds.

3) If the relationship goes sour (and yes, this does occur), you must break it off cleanly. If you don't, and feelings still linger, then this is going to be a distraction to both you and other folks in the dojo will be uncomfortable seeing the lingering strain between the two of you.

4) If something catastrophic happens that cannot be reconciled, are you, or is he, capable of simply walking away from the dojo entirely? This is a difficult question, and the answers may not be to your liking, but it's necessary.

Finally, you need to ask yourself: Are you willing and able to do all of the above if push came to shove? If so, then by all means, go ahead. I've known a good number of folks who trained at the same dojo that ended up getting married, and it certainly can work. For some folks, having their significant other in the same classes worked out great, as both were able to "feed off" each others' work ethics and intensity.

If you honestly belive that you couldn't do all of the above if it came down to it, then it's probably not a good idea. I've seen various dojos lose good students because one couldn't handle the strain of having the ex in the same class, or even as an instructor.