A question

[Patrick]

Hello,

We removed a post in error. It is quoted below. I apologize for the confusion. Thanks.

I wonder how it would be like to be a mother who was a serious martial arts fighter (bloodsport, ISKA, etc). Even though I am a man, I figure there would be some socal stigma attached to such a woman.

I wonder what it would be like to be a father who is a serious martial arts fighter? To me it is the same - other than the fact some men don't like to see women (especially pretty women) get beat up.

To me, the issues of being a parent and a serious martial arts fighter would be the fact the fighter would have to train almost every day - they'd live, eat, and breathe martial arts, do a lot of travelling to and from competitions, which may - or may not - include their spouse and child(ren). It may also involve endorsement deals, and lots of self promotion.

If the spouse is not supportive of this, then (male or female), then they'd have a lot to talk about.

As for the issues of social stigma with a figthing woman - there is social stigma for all sorts of women - we face critcisms if we choose to work full time, have hobbies of our own, or even if we decide to stay at home and raise our families, have plastic surgery, or whatever we want, we face criticism. As a woman, if I spent all my time trying to make sure everyone was pleased with my decisions, I'd never make a decision without being so wracked with guilt that someone might be offended!

By the way, I'm also aware that men face social stigma as well - stay at home fathers, men in non-traditional professions or hobbies, too wimpy, too aggressive, make less money than their spouses - I think you get the point.

I think an approach to these social stigma issues is we all have to find our own answers, by following our own consciences and experiences and making well planned decisions that consider the implications of the paths we are contemplating; there isn't much more we can do.

Well said, very well said. Women are often criticized for not being passive enough. Even with the breakthrough of having female protagonists in the media, they are often portrayed as passive and non-initiating, with all the bad things "just happening" to them and their heroic role to overcome them. The female archetype in today's society is a woman who can please everyone.

Just think of the issue of mothers with young children who often feel guilty of not working enough in the office and at the same time feel guilty of not spending enough time with their children. The mixed messages of society needlessly creates a dichotomy in two aspects of life that would otherwise be complimentary for men.

Men are criticized, too, if they aren't masculine enough or if they break out of the traditional role, as karate_woman said.

Ultimately, people who pursue martial arts to enrich their lives usually don't give a damn about what other people think because they know what they are getting into and they know what they are getting out of it. Those who are not quite sure of why they join or join just because they think it is "cool" may not shield against societal pressures as well. It really shouldn't be a problem.

[Kajukenbopr]

My Sensei's wife was one strong girl in Kajukenbo. Most people only thought she could defend herself; noone criticized her. And trust me, she could beat up guys back when she was trainning.